Benji's Very Own Christmas Story

One of the best things about making movies with Benji

is getting to travel around with him

on personal appearance tours after the movies are made.

We were in Europe on just such a tour

when this little village in Switzerland

invited us to be grand marshals at their Christmas parade.

It sounded like a great side trip,

so off we went to this wonderful little village

in the mountains, with snow, and sleighs, and jingle bells.

And I remember saying at the time,

"There couldn't possibly be a more Christmasy place

in all the world."

Little did I know how right I was.

-

Ah, welcome! - Thank you.

And look at that face!

Welcome to Zermatt, and a merry Christmas to you.

Thank you. - Thank you.

And may I say how privileged and proud we are

to have you in our Christmas parade.

And we are so happy to be here.

Good.

Are you a priest? -Priest?

I'd rather not.

I am Kris Kringle. - Kris Kringle?

You don't look anything like our Santa Claus.

Well, of course not.

Kris Kringle is what Santa Claus looks like

in Germany.

Rather, what Santa Claus used to look like in Germany.

But there is a movement afoot to bring me back, exactly

as you see me now.

Bring you back to Germany with a British accent?

Uh, well, as Kris Kringle, Santa Claus and St. Nicholas,

I must endeavor to be everything to everybody,

and I should not be caught showing any favoritism

in any one direction, at any certain time.

No, no, no. Yes, well...

What accent would you prefer?

An American accent!

A southern American, if my guess is correct.

Texas. -Texas.

Well, I'm as happy

as a hen on a June bug,

to think you all came all the way from Texas.

Which reminds me, I have some friends

who would sell their boots, sell their boots to see Benji.

But they can't come to the parade because

they're working.

So, I wonder if we could go there before the parade starts.

Only take a few minutes, I assure you.

Are you sure we'll be back in time?

What did he say? -I haven't the slightest.

Come, come, we have little time.

Five minutes.

Up here.

Here we go.

Doesn't that mean "forbidden"?

Not in Russian, my dear. -Oh.

What does it mean in Russian?

Hmm? Absolutely nothing.

Ah.

Hold the door. This way.

Hurry, hurry. We haven't much time.

Now, come along.

Now, come along, my dears.

We must not dally.

Where are we? -Ah, where are we?

Yes, well, somewhere exactly between here and there,

which is halfway between sooner or later,

and very nearly up and down.

Now, do come along. We haven't much time.

Hi, boss!

I'm afraid things aren't working well at all.

Well, they simply must!

We have no choice, you know!

Do come along, this way.

Ah, thank you so much for coming, Mrs. Garrett,

Ms. Smith.

We all love Benji so much.

But then what difference does love make

if the boss doesn't go?

It's all for naught, and naught for all.

Have you never seen an elf before?

Now, do come along, please. We really must hurry.

Well, I'm afraid we're a little confused.

Oh, that's certainly nothing to be afraid of.

We all get confused, because it's a confusing world.

Not just here, but there.

Though it shouldn't be, but it is, isn't it? Or is it?

But where is here?

Where is here?

Well, yes, where would you like it to be?

Switzerland, Texas, the North Pole?

What?

Please, don't confuse us any more than we already are.

We would just like to know what's going on.

My dear-- - Look out below!

Oh dear.

Whatever it is, it's obviously

not going very well.

But I'm sure they'll be ready in time.

You see, my little people are going in my place

this year.

Going where? -Everywhere.

You see, I fell into a bit of bad luck,

and I doubt that I could get down

even the largest of chimneys with this.

Look out!

If he can't handle the sleigh by itself,

how is he ever going to handle it with

flying reindeer?

Flying reindeer?

Oh, no, no, no. Not always.

I have several modes of transportation.

In some countries, I ride a camel.

A camel?

Yes. Sometimes, it's a horse

or a donkey.

But believe it or not, in England, I ride

a white goat.

A white goat. -In England.

Do you get the feeling he wants us to believe

he's really Santa Claus?

My dear, I only want you to believe one thing,

and that is that we're very late,

and if we don't hurry along, you'll miss the parade.

So, do come, please.

Where are your reindeer?

Reindeer? Oh, uh...

There they are.

But that looks like a birdcage!

Well, of course. We must keep the lid

on them somehow.

They have a tendency to flit about, you know.

Well, where's Rudolph?

Rudolph, oh, I'm afraid he's in the shop

getting his batteries recharged.

But, Dancer, well that's another problem.

Out again?

Oh, dear.

Get Cupid out here, and let Blitzen nuzzle her ear.

That'll get him down.

Dancer's a very jealous reindeer, you know.

I don't believe this.

But you're supposed to be at the North Pole.

Why aren't you at the North Pole?

Ah, well, we were actually for a time,

but it's frightfully cold up there,

and this is so much more centrally located.

Well, where's your red suit?

In the United States, Santa Claus wears a red suit.

Does he?

Of course I do.

It's right there in the wardrobe,

which, incidentally, is our first stop.

But several years ago, my parents told me that he--

I know.

So did mine.

Anybody home?

Anybody home?

Ah, come in, come in.

I want you to meet the elves who make

all my different outfits.

How many outfits do you have? -How many what?

Oh, I'm afraid I have no idea.

You see, people in different countries all think of me

in different ways, so I have to be different.

That is to say, however they want me to be.

Now, where could those two be?

Needles, Pins, I have a surprise for you!

A surprise?

Don't tell me,

your leg is healed, and you're making

the Christmas Eve trip yourself.

And we can stop working 24 hours a day

making clothes for Santa Claus substitutes.

Right?

Wrong.

I have brought someone to see you.

What do you think?

Well, the one on the left would do okay for Scandinavia.

But the one on the right... Mm...

I don't know.

Maybe Iceland?

Well, let's get to work.

No, no, no, no. Not them.

That is to say, I did bring them,

but them is not who I was talking about.

I mean, them are not who I was talking, I mean--

Oh, we know what you mean.

But we still don't know who you're talking about.

Oh I think he's talking about Benji.

Benji?

Yes. That's it, of course!

Benji!

Benji, in person.

Or should I say, in dogson?

No, I suppose not.

What a pleasant surprise.