Young Sheldon

What are you doing here?

Apparently, the head of the college

wants to talk to us.

I'll just get right to the point.

I would like you and your son

to meet with a very important benefactor of the college.

Why us? Sheldon is

an impressive addition to the physics program,

and-and we like our donors to feel really good

about where their money's going.

No, thank you.

Can I speak to you alone?

Will you give us a minute?

Very well. But if you're looking to see

if my father will be a potential donor,

you are barking up the wrong tree.

People often ask why I was so resistant

to getting a driver's license.

My spotty history with motor vehicles

was certainly a factor.

Please slow down.

I'm going eight miles an hour.

A cow just passed us.

You're gonna hit it!

Make it stop!

It's just a car wash.

Do something! It's just a car wash.

We're gonna die!

Just a car wash.

Why did I agree to this?

I don't care for this at all.

My God.

Are you okay?

Yes, I think so.

Tow truck's on the way.

You sure

we shouldn't call an ambulance?

I'm fine. Sheldon?

I feel fine.

What happened?

A cat ran in front of me.

You couldn't stop?

I tried, but the brake just gave out.

Well, thank goodness it wasn't worse.

I should have aimed for the cat.

Looks like your car's gonna be out of commission for a while.

If you need a ride, the church offers a shuttle service.

I'm not getting on that geezer bus.

It's just for people who can't get around.

That's 'cause they're so shriveled up,

they can't even see over the steering wheel.

That's not nice.

I've driven that van... it is grim.

If Meemaw doesn't have a car, who's gonna drive me to college?

I guess if we leave early, I could take you before work.

Hey, when you take the shuttle, bring hard candy.

They gobble it up.

I can't believe

you and Meemaw almost died tonight.

I wouldn't say we almost died.

Well, that's what I'm saying at school tomorrow.

Why? It's called good storytelling.

But it's lying. They don't know that.

You weren't even in the car.

Doesn't matter. Shay McElheney's dad

had a kidney stone... she got out of homework for a week.

I can't believe you'd use my traumatic experience

to manipulate people.

Really? I can.

Hey, did the engine catch fire?

No!

You're in shock. You don't know what happened.

I might be a little late picking you up tonight,

so you can wait in the library.

All right. I didn't have time

to make lunch, so

are you okay...

Okay.

What's going on?

I can't do it. What's wrong?

What if there's another crash?

Baby, that's not gonna happen again.

You don't know that.

Sheldon, if you don't get in right now,

you're going to miss school.

True.

I know you don't believe in it,

but I'm gonna say an extra special prayer right now

to keep us safe.

Lord,

please look after me and Sheldon

on our drive to school

I'll get back to you.

You see Sheldon? That way.

What's going on?

He's having some sort of panic attack.

Man. My story just keeps getting better.

Baby, you can't go the rest of your life

never getting in a car again.

Before cars were invented, people did it all the time.

Well, I'm not gonna force you.

Thank you.

I can't get him in the car.

So what now?

So he's not going to school.

You know, on The A-Team, Mr. T is afraid to fly,

and they give him special milk to put him to sleep.

Ooh. No!

Aw.

I don't care what your guy says.

Have him check it again.

Sorry, I'm cranky.

No problem. I like when you yell at people who aren't me.

Stupid mechanic said the brakes are just fine.

Well, you probably stepped on the wrong pedal.

I didn't.

I'm just saying, it happens

with people our age, you know.

I've been driving my whole life.

I know which pedal is which.

Now you're yelling at me.Sorry.

What do you think about letting me borrow your truck today?

I don't know. Why not?

'Cause I like my truck.

Not funny.

It is. You're just cranky.

Fine.

Maybe I'll just ride my bicycle to the salon.

You ride a bike?

Is that amusing to you?

An old lady riding a bike?

No.

Shut up.

Okay, will do.

My goodness. Was anyone hurt?

No. But now I got no car for a while.

You could ride your bike.

An old lady on a bike? That's not cool.

Really? Then I won't ask how I look on one.

You look great.

I know.

I just wanted to hear you say it.

So, there's no one who can lend you a car?

There is the church shuttle,

but that just feels like it's the end of the line.

I wouldn't say that.

There's all sorts of depressing steps before the end.

You've got full-time

nursing care.

Bye, John.

Assisted living.

Bye, John.Hospice.

Bye, John. Life support.

Bye, John!

Pulling the plug.

Bye, John. Then

you make a miraculous recovery!

Great! But

the hospital bills

leave you destitute! Bye.

Bye.

Grant Linkletter.

Dr. Linkletter, Sheldon Cooper.

I wanted to let you know I won't be in class today.

Is everything all right? Yes,

but in the interest of self-preservation,

I've decided to avoid traveling in motor vehicles.

I'm sure there's a story behind that.

There is. I don't want to hear it.

So, how shall we handle today's class?

Well, I'm sure you can get notes from another student.

Or you could give the lecture to me right now.

That's preposterous.

Why? We could be creating a new model of education

where students could learn remotely.

It could be the wave of the future.

Sheldon, it's your responsibility

to come to class, not mine to bring the class to you.

My meemaw gets cranky like this when she's hungover.

Is that what's happening here?

First Baptist of Medford. How may I bless you?

I thought Peg answered the phones.

Mom?

Yeah.

Something I can help you with?

No, it can wait.

You want the number to the shuttle, don't you?

Yes.

Let me get that for you.

Um, looking under "G" for "geezer bus,"

and it's not there.

That's hilarious.

Maybe it's under "O" for "old fogies."

You know, you're not being a very Christian person right now.

I have enough prayers in the bank, I can coast for a day.

Just give me the number!

All right. Now, remember when you call

to let them know if you need any help getting up stairs.

Dr. Linkletter wouldn't give me what I wanted.

I couldn't tell on him to his mommy,