Red Sonja

In a time before history, the Hyborian Age,

there existed the land of Hyrkania.

It was a place of breathtaking beauty and pristine nature,

where people lived as one with the Goddess of the Earth...

...respecting her gifts and sharing her bounty.

It was a time of peace and harmony,

until the rise of the barbarian King Anzus,

who swept across the land, bringing terror and destruction wherever he went.

Okay, let's play rock, paper, scissors.

Just bad dreams, Vihur.

Time to move on.

We're heading west today.

I feel today is the day.

Bless your sacrifice.

Thank you, forest.

Goddess Asherah, please make today the day I find my people.

-Mm. -

-Oh, stop it. -

Your odor would fell a skunk.

They went this way! All men!

- Look, tracks there! Come on! - Get after them, boys!

- -

- Get after them! - Yeah, there! Come on!

I see their tracks! Come on!

On me! Don't let them get away!

Let's make some money!

-Goddess Asherah... -

...I pray you ease the suffering of this child of your forest.

And grant me the power to find those who did this.

You can't come.

You stay here.

I'm gonna cut some throats.

Vihur, are your ears still filled with water?

Vihur, I said stay here.

When I get back, I'm swapping you for a pony.

- - Pass me another keg!

I'm not nearly drunk enough!

- Looks like you boys had a good day. -

Fantatherium horn will bring real gold.

Aye. And there's more where that came from.

We're gonna leave this place rich men.

- Nothing left but vermin and scavengers. -

-Mind the claws! Mind the claws! -

Careful. Careful!

Move your feet!

In you go! Get in there!

- Careful! -

It's the emperor. The emperor's coming.

It's him and his machines.

Kneel before your emperor.

Down on your knees.

What?

Oh.

Thank you.

Thank you. That's very kind.

My Emperor, we have prepared a feast in your honor.

Oh, oh. Progress first, feast later, Commander...

-Artran. -Commander Artran.

I want to hear of nothing but progress.

Uh, progress is excellent.

We're clearing half a league a day.

Half a league? Uh, are my machines not working correctly?

Oh, no, no, no. Your machines are exceptional, my Emperor.

They're a wonder of invention.

A testament to your wisdom and vision.

Each one faster than 100 slaves.

I marvel at the brilliance of your mind

that you could even imagine them.

Without these machines, we would never be able

to cut the trees as fast as we are.

But the forest is vast, and we lose many workers

-to the beasts that dwell within. -Uh, Commander Artran, you see,

we need the lumber to fire the furnaces,

and the ore is building entire cities.

Homes for people. Places for people to live, to work, to trade.

Do you see? And there are secrets within

that I shall have.

You wouldn't deny me these things.

-You, you shall have everything you desire. -Good.

We've captured beasts for your arena, sir.

Sabertooths, volkhunds, a mortiferum even.

I am getting a cyclops, though.

Isn't that right, Minister Coltar?

-Oh, yes. Yes, Emperor. -

We have hunters in the forests of Nordheim

-and Brythium right now. -

They will not fail you.

Now, that is real progress, Commander Artran.

Now, who do we have here, General Karlak?

The last of the Turan rebels, my Emperor.

Move it. Move it! Down, on your knees!

Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah! Have a care.

This man was once the greatest king of Turan.

Your Majesty, off of your knees. You were royalty.

Show some dignity in defeat.

You know, we once met before, when I was

a little slave boy pouring ale in the service of King Anzus.

We did. Oh, yes, yes.

I recall you had the promise of greatness about you even then.

-Really? -

Because I recall how you spat on me.

-Ah... -But, but, ancient history.

Perhaps we can make amends.

-Amends? I'm-- -Yes.

-I am at your service, Emperor. -Yes.

Yes, you are. Your lands bordered the Hyrkanian Forest.

And it's said to be as wide as the world itself.

You know I'm looking for something there.

The missing half of your Book of Secrets?

Do you know where it is?

Glorious Draygan, uh, the Hyrkanian Forest is

endless and full of monsters.

What of the tribes who live there?

There are no tribes, Emperor. It is too dangerous.

What of the Hyrkanians?

The Hyrkanians were all slaughtered

by your predecessor, my Lord.

Anzus, who you defeated

with your machines and your brilliance.

Only the gods dwell within,

and only they decide who may pass through.

You think that your gods can stop me

from conquering the world beyond?

Even you cannot defeat gods, my Lord.

Is that right?

I will defeat your gods.

Do you want to know how? Hm?

It's knowledge.

Knowledge that allows me to control the world

like I control those savage beasts.

It's knowledge that brings civilization to the barbarians.

Have any of your gods ever done that?

-No. -No? Why?

Why?

Why?

Because your gods are not real!

They don't exist, and yet you continue to believe.

And that is why you and all of your kind

are relics from the past, and I am the future!

-Karlak? -

-What is your judgment, Emperor? -

He's of no use to me.

What do we have here?

Is this machine not working correctly?

- -

- -

- Good to see a king get his head cut off! -

Don't let the emperor hear you say that.

He'll have that ape man cut your head off too.

Nah, we got him a nice beastie for his arena.

- -

You came into my forest and left death and suffering.

You have nothing but cruelty in your hearts.

Whores are supposed to be in that tent.

I'll come by later.

You look as if you clean up good.

- -

- Murderers! -

-Easy, my friend. -

I'll have you and your kin back in the forest soon.