Casual

Previously on "Casual"...

Why are you giving my nine-year-old a music sermon?

We're trying to find Alex's sister's dad.

Oh. Is your mom still alive?

- I think so. - Could you ask her?

There's something toxic in the air

that no one wants to talk about.

I just think you're making my generation pay the price.

Please vote yes on the moratorium.

You're not poison. You know that, right?

Casey, Pete Nako has office space in Sacramento.

Can you take a look on Friday?

- What's in Sacramento? - The next battle.

Good news, I found your half brother.

This is my thing.

You can't just fucking insert yourself.

This is when you leave.

- Can we talk? - Yeah, why don't you, uh...

go to your hotel room and give me a call?

When somebody says they're gonna be there for you,

they have to actually show up.

I'm here now.

That was a good date.

- Hai! Hai! Hai! Hai!

I was afraid he was gonna get kicked in the head.

You know, in a way,

karate is the original yoga.

Eastern tradition appropriated by white people in crisis?

Who are you?

Do you think that we'll ever have sex?

Presumably? I was banking on a spontaneous,

- passionate romp. - Oh.

People singing and dancing while we do it.

No? That sounds right to me.

Spontaneity dies at childbirth.

- Libido does not. - Hm.

- Let's make a plan. - We can do it in the office.

- I prefer to keep my job. - Huh.

- Oh. - Hey, buddy.

- Look who I ran into. - Yo.

Jake's mom said I could go over before dinner.

- Can I? - Sounds like a plan.

Sounds like a plan.

Great, let's do it.

Do you think people in the 12th century were guilted into hiking?

I feel like preindustrial guilt was probably

- a little less exercise related. - Oh, wow.

Fuck you, cotton gin.

You still up for the spa later?

I am totally up for that spa later.

- Is that Alex? - Who's that?

- What'd he do? Steal a family? - I know. Weird.

- Okay, buddy. - Uh, can we go say hi

- for a second? - Yeah.

- Hi. - Hey.

Hey.

- You're sweaty. - Yeah, we hiked.

- Hi. - Did like... What we do?

- Like, six, seven miles? - Probably two miles.

Okay. Felt like six or seven.

I wanna sit down. My limbs hurt.

- Okay, bug. - Oh, uh, sorry, Judy,

- Valerie, Jack. - Hey!

- That's Clark. - Hi.

Oh! You're... You're Alex's sister.

Yup. How'd you guess?

Gypsy blood. Mom was a two bit psychic.

Ran a booth at the county fair. You know the story.

He told me about you.

Yeah. Right.

So what's been going on?

Um, I don't... Yeah, not much.

A lot. We should catch up.

We should do dinner at my place next week.

- I'm in Dubai, remember? - Oh.

But let's, uh, let's go to the phones and...

Let me see. What about next week?

- The week after? - I can't do Monday or Thursday

- of that week. - Tuesdays are bad for me.

- Wednesday? - I can't do Wednesday, sorry.

- All right. - Friday.

- Friday. - Friday.

- Great. - Thanks.

- Yeah. - Okay, well, we should probably...

Yeah, we gotta...

Bye, kiddo.

- It was great to meet you. - Yeah, really nice

to meet you guys. See you in a few weeks.

- All right, bye. - Bye.

See ya. Great to see you.

Yup.

That wasn't weird at all.

Hey, you with me?

- We have our plan. - Our plan.

Yes.

All right, buddy.

Let's go. I bet you're starving.

Get up.

A spotless table tells no story.

- Now it's got character. - Oh.

Oh, you think this is funny?

Or that I wouldn't notice that all my wine is gone?

Sorry. I had some work friends over.

It was six bottles, Laura.

We were celebrating.

We won.

Okay, all right.

Well, this website says make a paste

of rottenstone? What?

Wait, no. No!

This... This is on you.

Remove the stain.

I don't want character.

Alex?

Can you come up here, please?

What?

Okay, I need you to take a look at something.

Oh, no! He's...

Sorry. Yeah. No.

Uh... I-I-I don't know, it's...

it's like a... it's a lot of skin.

- Like so much skin. - It's the same amount of skin.

Right, but you... You know when you see someone

who wears glasses without their glasses?

It's like that, but worse.

Why would you shave it?

The constant bombardment of messaging to conform

to unrealistic and arbitrary beauty standards?

- But you're a dude. - I know!

I know. I thought I was immune,

but then I saw that fucking Armani billboard on Sunset.

- Oh, the David Beckham one? - Yes.

Can you close your fucking towel?

Fine. Yes, the David Beckham one.

- Yeah. - Who I don't even like

and he sucks at soccer now,

but he's got that, you know, the tattoos

with the pose with the white underwear

- and the sex muscles. - Fine. She won't even notice.

- It'll be dark and you'll be... - Rae, it's gonna be 4:00 p. m.

And we'll be sober.

Good luck.

He should come with a warning label.

- She's a grown woman. - Yeah, with a kid.

And he's never had his hands

on that kind of technology before.

Well, should we go back in time and stop him?

Like the X-Men?

- Jack? - Hi.

Actually, I booked with him. If that's okay if we switch?

Oh, uh... Yeah.

Hey.

- Ready? - Yeah.

- Hey. - Hey, so does Judy

have any dietary restrictions? Is she a vegetarian or...

Do you order food by mail? It's two weeks away.

Um, listen, when a man goes to get a massage,

- does he usually get a... a... - Happy ending?

Yeah. Would a fancy spa do that?

Or is that more of a... seedy strip mall

in Glendale kind of thing?

We're a capitalist society, Val.

Only difference between fancy and seedy is the opening bid.

- So anywhere? - I don't know.

Google it. Oh, I gotta run. Bye.

- Hi. - Hi.

We don't do that sort of thing here.

Oh, yeah, no, I know.

Of course.

So...

off to scenic Sacramento?

- I'd like to visit. - You should.

Or, I don't know, screw it.

Come along and unpack some boxes?

You need bodies, right?

No, I'm serious. I can make it work.

Laura, I can't pay you.

I mean, I can't feed you, I can't house you.

I don't even know where I'm sleeping yet.

- But I wanna help. - Help here.

I mean, there's Skid Row,

- immigration, housing... - I want to help you.

I mean... you were my favorite intern.

You're gonna do great things here.

You okay?

Can we maybe close the curtains?

They are closed.

They really are just for aesthetic purposes, huh?

Ooh, somebody's smooth down there.

Yeah, well, typically I'm trimmed, not shorn.

Have you thought about blackout shades?

- Shh. - Okay.

What's wrong?

Intellectually I know this isn't a big deal.

I promise it's not.

Right, but millennia of masculine bullshit

is in our DNA. Virility is like...

the center of the male psyche.