Guns & Moses

Hi, um...

after a long life, Morry Goldberg

lies in the dirt-- no, on his deathbed.

- Is he here yet? - No.

And your job is to VIP Alan.

Alan wants to know where the mayor is.

Well, I confirmed with his office.

I confirmed with him. I checked the traffic.

I confirmed, I checked, meanwhile,

- I can't get my speech right. - Moyshe,

you're gonna be great.

- Okay. - Okay, I'm going back inside.

- Okay. - Okay.

- Ten-thousand steps. - You cheated.

- There he is. - Ahh.

Welcome, Mr. Mayor.

Ahh, shalom, Rabbi.

Shalom.

Rabbi Mo.

- Mr. Fassbinder. - My wife is shivering.

You have got to turn up the heaters.

Excellent idea, Mr. Fassbinder.

You are now officially in command of the heaters.

You there,

turn up that heater.

Turn up all the heaters.

Well played, Rabbi.

Ba-ba-ba, there you go.

Jerry, how are you?

Reed, congrats on Brandeis, very nice.

- Mayor Kirk. - Alan.

Mayor Kirk, I'm sure you know Alan and Liat Rosner.

Oh, do I know Alan.

I know that he married up, and he cheats at golf.

At least I don't cheat at the things that count,

Mr. Mayor-- how many ex-wives

- are you supporting? - Huh.

How many offshore accounts have you been hiding

from the IRS, Mr. Rosner?

How many votes did you forge in the last election?

Alan, Mayor, do we have to get into this stuff tonight?

- I mean-- - How many insults do we have

to throw at each other before the rabbi knows

- we're kidding? - Come on.

Okay, okay.

Mr. Mayor, do tell me about those offshore accounts.

Oh, attagirl. Rabbi, you're a good sport.

Well, I'm just honored you guys feel

comfortable enough to pull my leg like that.

- Of course. - Can we get a picture?

- Yeah. - Yes, of course.

Johnny, come in, come in.

Oh, yeah. So glad you could come, Mayor.

Anything for you, pal.

- Perfect, thank you. - Great.

Why don't we take a seat?

After a long and productive life,

Morry Goldberg lies on his deathbed,

and he says, "Is my Sarah here?"

"Yes, I'm here, my husband."

"Are my boys Max and Bernie here?"

"Yes, we're here, Dad."

"Are all my grandchildren here?"

"Yes, Morry,

all of us are here," says Sarah.

And then Morry Goldberg

leans forward one last time

and says,

"Then why is the light on in the kitchen?"

That was for you, Alan.

A green joke for our green hero.

Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Alan Rosner.

Okay, Esty, roll the video.

Roll the video.

Many people talking about ending

our fossil fuel reliance,

but Alan...

Alan makes it happen.

Rosner Energy powers

over 100,000 homes

with pure sunlight every day.

And now that Alan's vision includes a building

for the High Desert Jewish Center,

that too will happen.

Mazal tov, Alan...

for your hard-earned award.

Take it away, Devorah!

Daddy, you taught me how to drive

and how to negotiate.

I'm honored to bring your vision

of the solar future to social media.

And now that I've reached over 20,000 followers,

I'd like to renegotiate my deal.

Daddy, you're my bestest.

Mazal tov on your big honor.

Take it away, Mom.

Ten years ago, the kids and I were

living in a one-bedroom in Van Nuys.

I was working nights.

You changed our lives, Alan.

You're going to change the world.

We're so proud of you.

Mazal tov, my darling.

Take it away, Koby.

Yay, Alan.

Uh... take it away, Jeff.

Yeah, uh, congrats, bro.

Dad would be proud.

Cheers.

Congratulations, Alan.

You're a generous man,

and your family is very proud of you.

Mazal tov on building the new temple.

Lahaim!

Esty, Levy, great job on the video.

That was great.

Ten years ago, Hindy and I opened

the High Desert Jewish Center in our living room.

At our first public event, all of seven people showed up.

But one of them...

was Mayor Donovan Kirk.

And a big hand for Rabbi Mo, everyone.

And to the High Desert Jewish community, I thank you.

But it is now my honor

and my pleasure to award Alan Rosner

a key to the city

for bringing high-tech,

large-scale solar farming

and hundreds of jobs to our city.

I'm also proud to call him my friend.

- Ahh. - But Alan, next time we golf,

I'm still taking all your money.

Ladies and gentlemen, Alan Rosner.

Oh-- but for the record, I let him win at golf.

Six months ago, Rabbi Mo called

and said that he and Hindy would like me

to be the guest of honor at the gala this year.

So, I immediately said,

"How much is that gonna cost me?"

It's true. Now, it's no secret

that I have a soft spot in my heart

for the High Desert Jewish Center.

I'm just a little tired of attending services

- in a strip mall. -

You know, I promised to give a bigger gift this year,

and Rabbi, I know you're waiting for a number.

- - Well, here it is.

I hereby pledge to help the High Desert Jewish Center

build a synagogue with a gift of $2 million.

Thank you, Rabbi.

- -

Get down! Get down!

- - Get down! Get down!

You all right? - Alan!

Alan!

Alan? Alan?!

Daddy!

Alan! Alan!

Alan!

Please call for help!

- Daddy! - A man's been shot.

Come to 51673 High Desert Highway! Now!

- Alan! - Down!

There's been a shooting!

Help!

Wake up!

Wake up, please!

- No. - Daddy.

Mr. Mayor.

Detective Nestor. This is Wallace.

Can you tell us what happened here?

Alan was... was up there,

and...

bullets came from that... that direction.

I handle security. It was the Nazi.

I called 911 on him twice.

Hundred.

- - Hundred.

That is a sick joke, you need

- to get away from us. - Hindy.

- Get away from us. - Hindy...

Go, go.

- Please, ma'am, let me. -

People who stick out their fingers,