PariWar

-What's your name? -My name is Naman.

Naman, any experience?

-Yes, I've acted in a play before. -Okay.

Do you remember the lines I gave?

-Yes, I've memorized them, sir. -Then go ahead and recite them.

Mercy befits the serpent that is venomous.

None care for the mercy of the timid one without any venom.

Son, understand the situation first.

What's the situation?

The situation is that Lord Rama is sitting on the seashore

and asking the ocean to make way.

How will he ask for it?

"Mr. Ocean, please let me squeeze through so that I can go to Lanka."

Well...

He's not going for a bath. He's going to Lanka!

Lanka!

-Show some fervour, some courage. -Yes, sir.

-Okay? -Yes, sir.

-Show him. -Okay, sir.

Mercy befits the serpent that is venomous...

Serve tea to both of them.

What's up, Munna?

How is the rehearsal coming along, Dad?

Yeah, it's pulling along.

Boys these days lack passion.

Timidly muttering... all the time!

In life, whatever you say,

say it with passion, got it?

When are you saying it?

Saying what?

I'm your father, sonny.

Oh, you mean Guddan.

Well, listen...

Get Guddan's signature on this paper.

While you're munching fries with her,

just gently slide the document towards her.

Dad, I've been watching you since yesterday.

You've been acting strange.

-What's going on? -Oh, really?

When I'd hold your willy to help you pee,

you never asked me what's going on then.

But you ask me that today, eh?

Come on.

-At least tell me what this is. -It's an NOC.

No objection certificate.

The land that Kashi donated to me for building a widowers' home,

suppose something happens to him tomorrow,

remember he has two hyenas for sons.

If they lose their minds and put me in jail,

would you like it?

-No, I wouldn't like it for sure. -That's it then.

It's no big deal.

Of course, it's a big deal. Guddan isn't a kid to sign blindly.

And what's with these tall tales about Asia's largest widowers' home?

You've never told me about it.

We barely get to talk, son.

You're busy with your life and I'm busy with my business.

Your mother used to keep us bonded.

Isn't it?

But how do I make her sign?

Keep a rose in the middle and hand it to her.

Women give their hearts in return for roses.

This is just a signature.

Go on.

Gotcha! It's my turn!

-Dad, is this a toy? Can I play? -Hey, wait...

It'll break, son. It's feng shui.

Go and play.

Sir, I wanted to ask you a question.

Go ahead.

When you started losing your hair in your youth,

did Kadambari call off her engagement with you?

No, Kadambari was willing.

But her family members,

father, uncles, brothers, all of them were against it.

"The groom is going bald.

"He won't look good if he's completely bald."

But Kadambari Shukla refused to marry after that.

She was a very stubborn woman.

-A pretty solid relationship, eh? -Shut up!

Dear Lord!

In my next birth, give me a few fingers less,

but make sure that I have a head full of hair.

The house has gone to the dogs.

Washing bedsheets was like a double cardio session.

Do you know about the cement factory proposal for that land?

I also heard about it yesterday.

And he wants to donate that land to a shelter home.

Living alone has driven Dad crazy.

Stand right here. Don't move.

Cigarette?

Sister, you smoke?

It's not a cigarette.

It's just spices, good for digestion.

I still chew carom seeds for digestion.

Dad has a lot of money. He has kept it hidden.

That's why there was a burglary at home last month.

They stole jackfruit.

Damn!

There was a time

when their family would first name an estate for the newborn,

then name the newborn.

Yes, boss, sorry, I couldn't talk earlier.

There were people around and the matter was confidential.

Now tell me, boss. You can speak freely.

Shishupal, you fucker,

on which horrible site did you post the matrimonial ad for my nephew?

Do you know what kind of women are coming?

-Yes, boss, I am-- -Don't "boss" me.

I'll look into the financial matter.

These girls breathe less and smoke more.

Sorry, boss. My wife was listening in on our conversation. I'm sorry.

Good. Let her listen in.

His boss has made his life hell.

I've told him so many times to quit this job and apply elsewhere.

Can't wait for my modelling career to take off.

Sister, isn't it a bit late for modelling?

Why?

Check how many bags are there.

-Seven. -Seven?

On three of them, stick labels marked "Banaras, Badke."

Dad!

I found this old jacket in your wardrobe. It's very nice.

See, it looks so good on me.

How dare you open my wardrobe?

Where did you get the keys?

Fine, fine, I'll keep it back. No need to get angry.

Are you going to take it to heaven?

-Manju. -Yes?

Is it left to right or right to left?

Move it clockwise.

This is clockwise?

Move it from left to right.

Okay, listen. A four-letter word.

Name an animal with really long nails.

Crocodile.

C-R-O-C-O-D-I-L-E.

That's nine letters, sister.

Dad, tell me a four-letter word

for an animal with really long nails.

With really long nails...

A mole.

-Like Mahipal. -Come on, Dad.

-Dad? -Yes?

Are Babloo and Rinki really...

-Are they really siblings? -Why do you ask?

I sense something fishy.

No, he's a very cultured boy.

He has an entire family plan in place.

He has the picture of Lord Hanuman

as a wallpaper on his phone.

Greetings, brother Kashi!

Gangaram is here.

Still on top of everything, eh?

What's going on, kids?

Take his blessings, boys.

This is Mahipal's and this is Shishupal's.

-God bless. -This is for you all.

-Sister got chocolates for us! -Yes.

Not sister, boys. Call him brother.

-Yes, what will you call him? -Sister!

Scoot now. Go on!

Brother, a minute.

I wanted to tell you that...

I'll show it to you.

Guddan is nowhere to be seen.

-She's in the shower. -Okay.

I'll wait.

No need to wait.

-Sometimes she sleeps off. -In the bathroom?

Hello? It's her wish.

Whether she sleeps in the bathroom or on the terrace, it's her wish.

-Who are you? -I'm Munna, I mean...

I'll call her.

What the hell!

Brother, as I was saying,

I met the doctor.

He was saying that you've been discharged,

but he was hesitating to send him the bill.

I told him that I'll pass it on. I mean, what's the big deal!

He doesn't need to hesitate.

You'll not want to leave behind debts at this age.

Gangaram, I truly want to

atone for the sins of this life--

-It's Rs. 1.5 lakh. -Rs. 1.5 lakh?

I don't have so much cash, so...

Badke, will you clear this?

Dad, I... I mean...

There's some issue with the bank.

I'm able to deposit money, but not withdraw.

I don't know why.

Yeah, that happens.

Well...

Shishupal will pay it. Shishu!

Dad, actually...

Since we left in a hurry,

he forgot to bring the bank card.

Oh, my!

-Guddan must be having-- -Guddan will do it.

-All right. -No.