Anniversary

Mr. and Mrs. Taylor, it's lovely to meet you.

What a wonderful party.

I almost forgot. I almost forgot!

I almost forgot.

Happy anniversary.

Wow, 25 years. It's quite an accomplishment.

"I am neither liberal nor conservative.

I prefer to be a free artist, and nothing more.

Free from violence and lies."

Chekhov wrote about the human condition, the absurdity of it.

The pain that arises when people who have...

clung to their habits and their delusions...

are forced to confront a reality

that contradicts their world view.

Does that sound familiar to anyone in here?

- (WOMAN) Yeah, I think it does. - (MAN) Of course.

- America today, perhaps? - (CLASS LAUGHS)

Table for four.

Welcome, gentlemen.

Afternoon, Senators Coyle, Hunt.

Paul, you studied in Lyon under Bocuse, so this should be good.

We're deadlocked. Settle this. Old school pizza joints.

- Chicago vs New York. - Malnati's or Patsy's?

But choose wisely, a floor vote hangs in the balance.

- Malnati's for the sauce. - Bring on the filibuster.

Patsy's for the crust. Food is the great equalizer.

Yeah, I got you. This one's going in the kitchen.

Two more and that's it, yeah.

Babe, why can't we sit with your parents?

I told you, babe, it's literally one long table.

- (PAUL) Hey, guys, come on in. - Hi!

- Ellen, a minute? - Oh, hi. Walk with me.

I want to get out before L Street's a clog.

Listen, um,

Dean Scanlin wants to address this hysteria...

about Ivy Leagues being bastions for radicalized liberalism.

We're not Ivy League.

This is why he feels

our university is best positioned to comment.

I feel a trap coming on.

The Sunday morning news shows.

I know it's a big weekend and the kids are all coming,

but the shows can do it remotely.

Just don't hand me talking points, Jim, okay?

I'll speak in my own words, okay?

How are we doing with the catering, Rana?

Everything is on schedule.

- (PEOPLE LAUGHING) - So, how's the speech coming?

Turns out menu writing is where my talent ends.

Ladies and gentlemen,

- Anna Taylor! - (CROWD CHEERING)

Oh, my God!

Hello!

Hi, everybody. How you doing?

You sexy motherfuckers, look at you.

Hello! Sit the fuck down.

- (SHUTTER CLICKS) - Okay, got it?

- Thank you. - Okay.

Oh, my God.

Oh, hey, come here.

Come on. Come on, don't be shy.

Thank you. How you doing?

- You okay? You sure? - Yeah. Yeah. How you feeling?

- Yeah. - Ready?

- Do I look okay? - Yeah, you look beautiful.

- You're not nervous, are you? - No. You?

No. No, it's gonna be fun.

Yeah.

You all right?

I'm glad we went with the jacket.

Yeah, me, too.

- (SIGHS) You excited? - Kind of. You seem nervous.

No, I'm okay.

- I'm gonna get us some drinks. - Okay.

I'll be right back.

Bird girl, are you here?

- (LAUGHING) - Hey!

- Oh, my bird girl! Hi! - I missed you!

I missed you, too. You look great.

I got you something. Here, check it out.

- (MURMURS) - (GIGGLES)

Mmm.

Okay, so this...

is one of the most subversive satires ever written.

It is a "fuck you" to the system,

if you couldn't tell.

- The reason I do comedy. - It's so sick.

- You like it? - I love it.

I think you need something else

on your walls besides like anime and...

You have so many leaves, Birdie.

Got some pictures.

So, what's happening?

What's going on? Tell me everything.

Josh brought the new girlfriend.

And, um, Aunt Paula is not here,

but she just got out of the hospital, so...

- Was she sick? - Eh, I mean, kind of.

She had a nervous breakdown

after Uncle Tommy watched an octopus documentary

and moved to a kelp forest in Tasmania.

- Wait. What? - (WHISPERS) That's her.

I gotta write this shit down.

Hey.

- Ready to go? - Yeah.

- (CLEARS THROAT) - (OLDER WOMAN) Hello!

Mama! Hi!

- Oh, I missed you. - Look at you! Wow!

- Mom, you look fabulous. - Come here.

Hi, Dad. Oh. How are you guys?

See your sister?

- (MOM) Did you see the sign? - Happy anniversary!

- Love it. - Love the sign, Bird.

I gotta get one of those. Hey, hey, hey!

See ya! (LAUGHS)

- Hi! How are you? - Hi!

- Hi! Hey. - Hi.

It's an interesting...

- weapon you're wearing. - Weaponry.

Have you met the girlfriend?

Yosh's new girl?

- He's making a move. - She doesn't blink.

- (ANNA) That's unsettling. - Hi.

Honey...

- I didn't see you come in! - Mmm. Hey, Mom.

- How was the commute? - It was fine.

- Hey, Dad. Good to see you. - How are you? Good to see you.

- Guys, this is Liz. - Ha.

It's lovely to meet you, Mr. and Mrs. Taylor.

Uh, very nice to meet you, Liz.

- Uh, Paul and Ellen, please. - Oh.

It's a wonderful party.

Yeah, you guys killed it again.

Oh, I almost forgot. Happy anniversary.

Thank you.

25 years is quite an accomplishment.

She tolerates me on most days.

Well, you have a beautiful family.

Only child here, by way of a nasty Midwest divorce.

- Mmm. - Mmm.

It's fine. The rage fuels the writing.

- So, you're a writer. - Yes, that's-that's how we met.

Yeah, we have the same agent. Christmas party.

She seems nice...

if you get past the Seventh Day Adventist vibe.

Just think, seems like only yesterday

he was so mad at us he ran away to the International Spy Museum.

- Nobody told me that. - I forgot about that.

Yeah. Remember that?

What sort of writing do you do, Liz?

Oh, well, I've been working on a self-organizing guide.

Our new world through a fresh prism.

That sounds important.

She's being modest, too. It's brilliant.

It is.

I'm, uh-- I'm looking forward to reading it.

I'd be honored, Ellen.

But I can't take all the credit,

Josh brought so much to the project.

Not really. Mostly editorial stuff.

- Not true. Not true. - It's more editorial stuff.

He's, really, he's an inspiration.

No, it's all her.

What happened to the sci-fi trilogy?

Ellen.

Uh, I haven't been working on that for a while.

I've been meaning to tell you

how much I enjoyed your short story.

Your short story.

It's a character study.

I haven't worked on it in a while. Never finished it.

Well, it was beautifully written, Josh.

Not really.

- It's old stuff, anyway. - Old stuff?

Oh.

I'm gonna top this one off.

You wanna go make the rounds a little bit?

- Yeah. - Yeah?

We're gonna--

I'm gonna go check on the catering.

Yeah.

I am the most easygoing person you'll ever meet.

Mind you, this neighbor comes onto my property with a chainsaw

and cuts down the tree.

- Invasive roots, he says. - Wow.

We're at a party. We're not talking about the tree thing.

Yeah, but we got a case, right?

Um...

- That's, um, small claims. - Yeah.

Rob and I do environmental law.

The moment has arrived, honey.

Speech time!

How are we gonna do this?

- (PAUL) I don't-- - Hello. Hello, hello.

I'm not gonna use this thing. I don't think so.