The Return of the Condor Heroes (神鵰俠侶)

Grand Tutor

These four?

Grand Tutor, they lost the royal standard They are going to be executed

Reverends, please wait here

You are just stupid

How could you lose my royal standard?

Your Highness, what is it?

These useless fools lost my royal standard

Your Highness, please don't be angry l have got it back

Grand Tutor you are just marvelous

l seem to have one arm less when you are not round

Your Highness, you are too kind

Your Highness, l have a request

Just say it

Could you spare them their lives?

No, they lost the royal standard They should be executed

Your Highness, the royal standard was stolen by Chow Pak-tung

They didn't know about it...

Even if they had known it beforehand

They still could not have stopped him

That Old Mischief again

Grand Tutor, a country of such grandeur

How can l not conquer it?

That's why Your Highness spent so many years preparing for this invasion

But one mistake and we are stuck

Your Highness, you have everything thought up

You ordered me to take the leadership of the martial world

But l failed you

Grand Tutor, you have done your best

There are just too many talents in the mainland

Like that Chow Pak-tung, he is so elusive

Old Mischief doesn't have a brain

He can be dealt with

l am not worried about him

l am worried about Kwok Ching in Xiangyang

lt is not so easy to take Xiangyang and our advance is stalled

Your Highness, have you heard of the saying

Use the barbarians to contain the barbarians

lt is the Han people's policy of turning one foreign tribe on another

We can borrow it

And use established martial arts force to contain other martial arts talents

You mean Quanzhen School?

Yes, Quanzhen School is powerful with a huge following

lf the school comes to our side

The martial world will split

But Kwok Ching has a special relationship with that school

He is practically a disciple

Quanzhen Seven are all patriotic

l don't think we can control them

Now we have a good chance

l have the two leading second generation disciples with me

They seem to need my help

And they can be our pawns?

Your Highness, Chiu Chi-king is already our pawn

Good, we use Quanzhen School to take on the martial world

All right, it is all my fault

Now l have known about it You want to kill me to silence me?

Where are you going?

l am going to see her l have to explain to her

You want to get killed?

lt is better than what l am

When l see her l just think l deserve to die

But if you are dead You can't see her again

Say that again and l will kill you

Amitabha, Taoism and Buddhism are two different schools

But we both pursue eternal life

Who in flesh and blood doesn't make mistakes?

Abbot...

So Reverend Wan, you are agonized by the mistake you committed

l don't know what mistake you have committed and l don't want to know

Abbot, thank you for your concern

Brother-in-arms Wan, we are guests here

l don't want to stay either

Reverend Wan, l wonder if we have the honour

l come here on His Highness' behalf

He invites you two to stay for a few days

Our pleasure, Abbot

l have a story in my mind

l wonder if you care to hear the story of Buddha making up for his mistake

Actually our founder was a precedent

Grand Master Chungyeung made a mistake too

He had wronged Lam Chiu-yang

He was different, it happened before he became a Taoist monk

And he was a frank and open man

Unlike me, l am a shameless scum

Please excuse me

Let me see you out

Why don't you let Dragon Girl finish him off

lf he dies, my chance of becoming abbot will be even more remote

Because you have a bad name Or you have too many enemies?

No, because my uncles-in-arms are not impartial

What if l finish Dragon Girl off?

Then l can use this secret to control Wan Chi-ping

But Quanzhen School is not that friendly to Mongolia

Because the old men are too stubborn only

But if you are in power...

Zhongnan Mountain is in Mongolian jurisdiction

Chungyeung Monastery of course has to abide by Mongolian rule

All right, l will kill Dragon Girl for you

How stupid, why not steal the royal standard tonight?

Over there

Grand Uncle-in-arms

What about a full moon?

Amitabha

Baldy, isn't it cool?

Excuse me, let us settle it some other day

l really am sorry, lass lt didn't occur to me you are here

Hey, can you teach me how to sleep on a rope without falling down?

l saved you, you should teach me for return, hey...

We were this close And that old rascal ruined it again

Don't worry, he won't stick around her forever

But Abbot, he means to learn the rope sleeping trick from her

He won't go if she doesn't teach him

Wait till he comes to steal the royal standard tomorrow night

Then everything will be solved

How come you can be so dour And so unresponsive?

lf you don't teach me how to sleep on rope l won't play with you

l am mad now and l am leaving

l really am leaving

You are worse than that shrew Wong Yung

She has a sharp tongue but she plays along

You seem to be mute

Who wants to play with you?

l can skip the play part

You teach me how to sleep on rope and l will go

l will never play with you again

l beg you, come on

Whatever it is in your mind, you say it Let me handle it for you

Then we can have fun together

l got it, you keep looking at the two Taoists

They must have bullied you

l got it right the first time

That's easy, let me catch them for you

Hey...

Don't you look like a rice dumpling now?

Or a crab?

Neither actually, you look like a bundle

Pity you are still useful

Now that you look so pitiable l should set you free

But don't worry l only borrow you for a while

You will be all right in no time

And will always be all right l promise you

l am back

Wan Chi-ping?

l got him back

You can do whatever you want with him

But before you punish him

Let me show you my masterpiece

My handwriting not bad?

He angered you, you can do whatever you like with him

You want me show you how?

l don't want to see him

Let me break his legs for you No!

You tell him to go

How troublesome you are

This is not right, that is not right

What really do you want?

What do l want? What do l want?

l always say women are just troublesome

You are lucky this time Don't be naughty again, just go

Hey...don't go, you have not taught me yet

l have followed you for so long

Can't you give me some response?

Cute, cute, now you have to play with me

Hey, give it back to me

lt is not yours, how did you get it?

Of course it is mine

You took the thunder ball from my hand Of course it is mine

Thunder ball?

Sure it is, its full name is the llluminating, Out-of-the-Blue, Thunder Ball

lt took me 49 days to find it in the Fiery Mountain

lt was not possible, l gave it to Gor

Gor? Gor who?

Gor is Gor, why should l tell you?

l mean what is his full name?

He...why should l tell you?

He is Yeung Gor?

How did you know?

l got it now, you stole it from him

Of course not, he gave it to me l can swear

All right, go ahead

l Chow Pak-tung now swear lf l stole the Thunder Ball from Yeung Gor

Let me be hit with shit, all right?

Bird dropping?

So you really stole it

You listen to me, this was what happened...

That day l felt hungry, so l stole a fish...

That's what happened

And he gave me the Thunder Ball

Have you seen him since? No

Oh yes, they call me the Old Mischief

Yeung Gor is a young version of me

l should have taken him as disciple How stupid of me

He sure is like you Yes

He is playful, but when he is tender He is very nice

He cares about me, and is good to me

He does everything for me

How corny

He sure doesn't like me in this aspect

l am scared of women, they give me creeps