The Taint

What's wrong with you?

Sometimes I dream.

Dream? About what?

It's dark

there's a woman crying.

Do you wanna do it again?

OK

Phil!

Aw! Sick.

Still got it.

Stay back.

You, you killed him!

Shut up.

Who are you?

Who was that large cocked man?

That was no man.

That was something far worse.

What was it?

How the hell are you still alive ?

What are you talkin' about?

The water!

The water.

What water?

You don't know about the water?

What are we gonna do?

The first thing you gonna do is shut the fuck up and sit down.

Let me think what we gonna do.

Stay right here ladies.

Who are you?

Misandra

They call me Phil

Phil O'Ginny

It's Irish.

When did it happen?

Twelve days ago

Everything I ever loved...

Everything anyone ever loved...

It all went to hell.

We are so in love

To us,

Fuck anybody who's not in love like we are

Must be fags

Total fuckin' queers

Yield beast!

Hey babe,

Can you fix me a glass of water please?

Of course.

Thank you.

Thanks babe.

So how was your day?

It was good, it was good.

Hey you know that uh...

that picture I have of you in my wallet?

Yeah?

I totally beat off to it during my lunch break.

Ugh...

What's wrong?

I... I don't feel so good.

I don't...

I hate women!

Ugh... I'm so fucking thirsty

I'm almost out.

I know of a well,

It might be un-tainted.

You can come with me...

but you've gotta pull your weight.

If all shit goes to hell,

I will not hesitate to kill you and eat your dead body for sustenance. Understand?

You'll eat my corpse if you have to...

Good. Lets go.

That nice-boobed girl! We have to help her.

No!

No!

Nooooo!

She was so hot!

Damn you!

You son of a bitch!

Get some rest.

Ah!

Shut up Pussy!

Fuck! I'm so fucked!

How long until we get to that well you were talkin' about?

Soon, maybe a day.

I just really don't want to have to drink my own piss.

I'm going to look for food, stay here.

Phil? Phil O'Ginny?

Mr. Johnson?

They call me Houdini now.

Who?

Meet my crew!

Browneye!

Balloon Knot!

Chili Dog!

Suave Daddy!

Pink Sock!

and Alligator Fuckhouse!

It's nice to meet you.

I have proven my leadership abilities by excelling in various forms of hand to hand combat.

This fist is legend.

A legend in fisting!

Yes. This fist has gotten me out of many tight jams,

and into them,

repeatedly,

again and again.

It is a good fist.

So! How did a boy like Phil O'Ginny,

never suited up a day in his life,

possibly survive the end of society?

Ironic isn't it?

I guess

Must of been luck that's kept you alive this long.

Yeah? Well what about you?

Me ?

I've been training for this day my whole life.

Broken hearts and lonely eyes

are raining down from the empty skies

I didn't see the imminent demise

of our love once on the rise.

Lightning striking in the depths of my soul

cracking thunder waking ghosts of old

now the thoughts of the love you sold

are driving me crazy and taking hold.

I tried to tell you

but you didn't listen.

You can only push it so far

I'll bury you in the sky.

I fuckin' told you!

I can be a mean man.

You crossed me for the last time.

Again, I'll bury in the sky!

We'll meet

within the shadows of love.

Shirts and skins boys!

Shits and skins... Hey Anderson take your shirt off!

I said take it off!

Mmmm!

Mr. O'Ginny,

n o uniform again.

Do you know what grade you have in this class O'Ginny?

You have a zero,

a fucking zero.

Do you have any idea how insanely pathetic that is?

How many years you been held back now?

What the fuck is wrong with you?

Seriously, I wanna know.

You are a limp-dick pathetic husk of a man!

I just thought you should know that.

Hey Anderson I swear to god you chubby fuck

if you don't fix that corner

I'm gonna fucking ram my fist up your ass!

It's about time bitch!

Are we gonna be alright Papa?

It's ok son, we'll be alright.

But I'm scared.

I'm scared too,

but don't worry, we'll get out of here

You're mother didn't die just so we could be stuck in this...

No!

I have to get my son out of here!

I have to get my son!

No!

Papa!

Fuckin' stupid shit,

God damn ridiculous fucking... shit.

So did you like the movie ?

No.

What?

Yeah. It's your fucking grandpa.

I hate that asshole.

Hello?

Oh my god. Oh my god.

What's wrong babe?

Are you hurt?

My grandma died.

I loved her so much.

So you're not hurt?

No, why do you keep asking me that?

I just want to make you feel better.

But you're not...

What?

Hurt.

No, what the hell is wrong with you?

I know, I know what'll help.

What are you doing?

I'm gonna give you something to cry about.

Don't worry, don't cry I promise it'll make you feel better

I love you.

Get the fuck away from me!

Bitch!

If I fucking give you something to cry about you won't have a reason to cry anymore.

Daddy?

Daddy.

Are you hurt?

Why are you crying?

I'll give you something to cry about.

Look a girl!

Let's gang rape her!

Woh woh woh, she's with me.

You guys are joking right?

Gang rape is not a joke.