Abbott Elementary

Oh, Nina,

excellent sentence structure.

Let me see. "My favorite movie is Toy Story,

and my favorite character is Woody."

Good. Mine, too.

Well, more of a Buzz girl. I love his ambition.

- Right, guys? - Yeah.

Okay, let's see. Brittany.

"My favorite movie

is American Gangster,

and my favorite character is Frank Lucas."

Okay. That is a great sentence.

And I will be having a third talk with your mom

about what you're watching at home.

Ow! Ms. Teagues, Andrew hit me!

Andrew, apologize.

One, two, three, four...

I'm Janine Teagues.

I've been teaching second grade

here at Abbott Elementary for a year now.

...eight, nine...

And as a product of the Philadelphia school system,

I'm proud to say I survived and now teach here today.

All right, guys, so there have been three presidents

since this one, okay? It's an old book,

so here's where I taped in the others.

I'd say the main problem in this school district is,

yeah, no money.

The city says there isn't any,

but they're doing a multimillion-dollar renovation

to the Eagles' stadium down the street from here.

But we just make do.

I mean, the staff here is incredible.

They're all amazing teachers.

I really look up to them all.

Please, sit down!

Why?

Well, I look up to the older ones.

We younger teachers are still getting the hang of it

if we don't end up leaving.

Look, I know this school is rough,

but I became a teacher

to make sure students come out alive.

And after learning a lot in my first year,

I finally feel on top of things.

Jamal, what are you doing?

I had to go, and the toilets don't work.

And the rug was plan B?

Janine, why are you putting that rug away?

Erica, I told you to call me Ms. Teagues.

I'm an adult, though we are almost the same height.

And there's a little bit too much pee on it.

Yeah, but where do we sit for story time?

I will figure something out, okay?

Losing the rug is a big deal.

For primary classes,

rugs are like a calming space for the kids.

It's like a Xanax.

Like a huge Xanax for kids to sit on.

Janine. Turn that down, please!

I'm trying to teach my kindergartners the letter "C,"

and they are distracted by this song.

It's like "Back That Azz Up" for kids.

Hey, guys, could you sit down, please?

Guys, I'm gonna count to 3.

One, two...

And I am not counting. Sit down!

I'm Barbara Howard, woman of God.

I do my work, I go home.

I get my nails done every week.

And I love teaching.

That is incredible, Ms. Howard.

I can't wait to get on that level.

Where is your class, by the way?

Out in the hallway in a single file.

Really?

Good morning, Ms. Teagues!

You know, Ms. Howard, you remind me so much

of my favorite teacher from the third grade, Ms. Elliot.

She was well-dressed, good with kids,

a wizard with a glue gun...

Thank you, Janine. That is very kind of you.

Yeah, I wanted to be just like her, actually.

I was, like, obsessed with her.

She wrote in my report card note,

"Needs friends her own age." "A bit clingy."

- She was a hoot. - Yes.

Anyway, hey, did you get my e-mail

about the two of us hanging together after school or...

No. It must have gone to spam.

It's so crazy how my e-mails

do that with you and nobody else.

Class, turn around.

Bye, Mom... I'm sorry. Ms. Howard.

Bye, Ms. Howard.

Janine, Janine, you're not gonna believe this.

Rachel freakin' Maddow just retweeted me.

- Wow! - So I basically work for MSNBC.

I'm Jacob Hill.

I like to say I teach history,

but I live in the present.

Jacob and I came in together last year

with 20 other teachers.

We're two of the three left.

So, trauma bonding, I guess?

Hey, do you want cheese steaks

from the corner store for lunch today?

Not from there.

The guy behind the counter, he calls me "white boy."

Well, it's like a term of endearment,

and, like, if you don't like it, just ask him to stop.

No way.

There's an entire chapter in White Fragility on that, okay?

Robin DiAngelo, she says,

"When you start policing people who have..."

Hey, Melissa, can you please tell "Ta-Nehisi Quotes" here

that "white boy" is a term of endearment

from the corner-store people?

For Zach Ertz, yeah. For him, it's an insult.

Melissa.

Schemmenti. Second-grade teacher.

What's half of 100?

50!

Also, $100, known as a C-note.

You Sicilian?

Italian?

You from South?

Okay, you guys working with the cops?

'Cause you gotta tell me.

Guys, I need a new rug.

Mine is officially done.

Me, too.

I shook mine out, and all of the asthma kids

had to go to the nurse's office.

Yeah, mine's busted.

And you can't class up a rug

like you can a couch with a nice coat of plastic.

Hey-yo! What it do, baby-boos? What y'all think about

this little film crew I brought in here?

Distracting, makes our jobs harder.

But exciting. We about to be on TV.

Because they are covering underfunded, poorly managed

public schools in America.

No press is bad press, Barb.

Look at Mel Gibson. Still thriving.

Daddy's Home 2? Hilarious!

Ava's our principal.

She has a unique take on her job.

She's bad at her job.

What's unique is that she's bad at her job.

There you are. Ava, can I talk to you?

I need an aide.

I'm outnumbered in there. The kids are crazy.

One of them told me to mind my six this morning.

I don't know what that means, and I need help.

Calm down. They're just kids.

And, besides, aides cost money, and we don't have that.

- Right, but I just... - Do you want to split

- your salary with somebody else? - No.

No, no. I didn't think so.

Well, if we can't get aides, maybe we can get new rugs?

All I'm hearing is, "New, new, new, need, need, need."

And, yet, Barb,

one of our best and most senior teachers here,

she never complains. What is your secret, Barb?

Knowing there's not much you can do, Ava.

So understanding.

Be like Ms. Howard, people.

But I'm not Ms. Howard.

Oh! Tina, look, just try some counting exercises.

Somewhere between 1 and 40, the kids calm down.

Oh.

You know, a little support

might help make things happen, ladies.

My support was gonna do about as much

as that five-year-old bra you've got on right there.

Hey, it's not impossible to get things.

Melissa asked for those new toy cash registers

for her classroom and got them.

Yeah, those aren't toys.

I know a guy who worked a Walmart demolition.

I got a guy for everything.

I know a guy right now working the stadium build.

- Need rebar? - No.

Melissa is resourceful, capable.

Well, I think the younger teachers are capable.

Really? Then why is it

that Ms. Schwartz's hair is falling out?

Why does Jacob here need a smoking break

every five minutes?

I switched to an herbal vape.

And why can't any of you stick it out

longer than two years?

More turnovers than a bakery.

Ouch.

You know what? Hell, I think we should still try for rugs.

Yeah.

You know, before I taught here, I was in Zimbabwe.

I was doing Teachers Without Borders,

- and what I learned... - Jacob,