Scream

It's a time-honored enforcement of the food chain.

The weak are outed and then eaten.

You are a mean drunk tonight.

Please. You agreed that clip was too good to trash.

Officer, she made me do it. She makes me do a lot of things.

My God.

Twitter's all over it. Audrey's totally trending.

It already has 500 views and counting.

Then why don't you make me a drink

while we break the Internet?

I know your parents are still out of town.

Aw. No.

I only needed your tech savvy tonight,

not what's in your pants.

Hi, baby!

Yes. The love of my life.

Come on.

Music on.

Aw, you want to come in the hot tub with me,

don't you, Sage?

You can't go in the hot tub.

That would be gross.

Aw, you want to come in the hot tub with me,

don't you, Sage?

Tyler, you are skating on restraining order lake.

Tyler!

I swear to God, if you are in my house,

you are dead!

Sage is a trained attack Pomeranian,

and she will gut you on command!

Well, maybe you should grow up!

And when you do, I'll be outside!

No. Stay inside.

Outdoor speakers on.

Tyler?

I may have underestimated you.

Then get over here and do something about it.

My God.

Call 911.

Calling pottery barn.

Help!

Help!

Somebody, please help!

Please!

Oh, God!

No! No, please!

1x01 - Pilot

Okay, come on, Will. Focus.

But, Em, your hair smells so good.

What is that, lime?

It's mango.

My gosh, and this delightful

wood-pulp-smelling thing is your Calculus book.

I don't get why I have to pass Calculus to play basketball

to get a scholarship to take more calculus.

Whatever. Because, will, your good looks

are only gonna get you so far in this world.

And if you'd shown up last night like you were supposed to...

I told you,

my phone died, and my charger's in my gym bag.

Okay.

Come on.

"Which of these equations best describes the relationship

between 'X' and 'Y'?"

Well, "X" is a moron who didn't call

the incredibly drop-dead gorgeous "Y"

to tell her he couldn't make it last night.

And "X" is very, very sorry.

Just don't do it again.

I won't.

I don't deserve you.

No, you don't. No.

- No. - No?

Do you want to stay for breakfast?

I got to go. Tell your mom I said hi?

- Okay. - Okay.

Emma, was that will I heard?

Yeah. We had to cram for a calc quiz.

Pre-dawn?

I thought teenagers were supposed to sleep till noon

and rot their brains on video games.

Well, maybe I got a defective one.

Yeah.

How's Clark?

That's Sheriff Hudson to you.

What are you getting at?

News flash... he likes you.

We work together.

Often over dead bodies.

I just...

I think you deserve a second chance.

Well, now that I have your permission,

I'll make sure I fall deeply in love.

Don't act like it's impossible.

You're a Coroner. You're not dead.

Get your stuff. Let's go.

Nice!

The lady of the of the hour.

Today is going to suck exceptionally hard.

What? No. You love taco Tuesday.

Come on. Let it out.

It's just, Rachel?

Seriously? The socially awkward

catholic-school film geek is your lesbian lover,

and I have to find out on Youtube?

I call a best-friend foul.

- I didn't make the video. - Yeah,

lack of production value made that pretty clear.

But if we could just move right on back

to the whole lesbian thing.

Okay, not a lesbian. Not discussing it.

Okay.

Right there, you guys.

My gosh.

Tell me what I can do to help.

Can you take the video down?

Well, it's already been yanked.

Probably flagged for content.

I tried tracing who sent it,

but the e-mail from the link is just a dummy account.

Thanks for trying.

Screw 'em, right? Come on.

I thought we agreed to trash that video?

She was bound to come out one day.

- Look at her. - What's the big deal if she is a lesbian?

Okay, the big deal is it wasn't her decision to tell the world.

Jake?

I wasn't the only one on that group thread.

And I did delete that video.

After I sent it to P.J. Girl-On-Girl is his demographic.

Riley?

Sorry. Zoey saw it on my phone.

Do guys even understand the term "viral"?

I don't see Nina anywhere.

You know she did the wide release.

Of course it was Nina.

She's a spoiled sociopath with no impulse control.

I mean, she's probably ditching right now

to avoid your good-girl wrath.

Em, your little friend will be fine.

We're not really friends anymore.

Just give it 24 hours, okay?

Someone will text and drive their hybrid into a tree

and we'll have a new headline.

Maybe Audrey will Taylor swift her anger

into creative energy for one of her little films.

Emma, she'll be fine. Okay?

Cavemen made fires.

Those fires cast shadows, and those shadows created fear.

Men have been obsessed with scaring each other ever since.

His name's Kieran Wilcox.

He just moved here from Atlanta.

I thought you weren't into high school guys?

No, that was just you.

Brooke.

Would you please tell us which genre originated with "The Castle of Otranto"?

The Castle Genre?

The Gothic Genre.

Thank you.

Guys, look, I get it.

Nobody wants to sit around reading 500 dusty pages

about monks and curses.

But nobody's forcing you to watch "The Walking Dead."

- Is "The Walking Dead" on the midterm? - Zombies are not literature, Jake.

Why not?

George Romero, Horace Walpole,

it's all the same bones.

Or the same rotting flesh.

Kieran's right.

Gothic genre is all over TV right now.

You have "American Horror Story," you have "Bates Motel," "Hannibal."

What about "Texas Chainsaw" or "Halloween"?

Those are slasher movies.

So, you can't do a slasher movie as a TV series.

Well, think about it.

You know, girl and her friends

arrive at the dance, the camp, the deserted town, whatever.

Killer takes them out one by one.

90 minutes later, the sun comes up as survivor girl's

sitting in the back of the ambulance

watching her friends' bodies being wheeled past.

Slasher movies burn bright and fast.

Hi, Sage! Hi!

TV needs to stretch things out.

Nina, are you home?

You know, by the time the first body's found,

it's only a matter of time before the bloodbath commences.

Nina Patterson's death is a great shock.

Once you've seen the grief counselor, you're free to return home.

Classes will resume tomorrow.

This Wi-Fi sucks. The cops aren't saying much.

Her mom found her body. The victim of foul play.

I need gory details.

Hello?

Miss? Why am I here?

That's the "mandatory" part of mandatory grief counseling.

No, but seriously, I feel shock, mild interest,

but not grief.

Guys, Nina was murdered in cold blood.

Do you not even care?