I Am Norman

I think we've all been there.

I think we've all been there at some stage in our lives.

You know, when things get bad.

You feel they'll never

never get better.

Ever!

I've been living in my car for about four years.

About four years yeah.

I love it!

It does get lonely though I'm not gonna lie.

I think I may try and sell them one day.

I'm sure someone out there would like them.

I like it here because it's peaceful.

It's my peaceful place.

And in the car

no one can touch you.

They can't really hurt you

they can't get to you, nothing.

They can if you don't park it in the right spot.

I know where all the best spots are.

Because I drive a lot.

I was gonna be an actor.

But my

penis wasn't big enough apparently.

They're very sizeist in the audition.

Size queens.

I had big talent but tiny cock.

And it is very off-putting.

You know, you try doing the words, with a CD round your knob.

A CD's a casting director by the way,

not a compact disc.

They do shoot dogs out here by the way.

That was her.

Rosie!

My little dog.

Run straight out of my car,

up into those fields

and I never saw her again.

Rosie!

Rosie!

Rosie!

Woo-hoo!

Girl!

Rosie!

Rosie Rose!

Rosie!

Woo hoo!

Rosie!

Rosie!

I miss here yeah.

And I still try and look for her.

I still have that hope

that I will one day,

one day find her.

Although it has been three years.

Actually instead of you coming over with me,

do you want me just to,

I can just point, in the sort of direction

and then you can just

edit it together.

Is that OK?

Is that alright?

Yeah, OK so...

I'll just...

If you film my finger

and then that will be,

you can edit that in your clip.

To point to where I'm going to take you,

cos erm, it's quite far.

You... you won't like how far away it is.

It's really far.

Erm!

And I, I don't actually want to take you there today.

So, if you could just follow my finger,

all the way.

Then that'd be great.

Alright?

OK.

Cos I know how filming works,

cos I've got my own camera and everything so,

I know how it works.

They get you to wear this

backpack full of rocks.

To fill the physical burden of being gay.

And they get you to

face a wall

and they'll just add more rocks,

and more rocks,

and more rocks.

And they wouldn't start taking the rocks out

until you'd given up.

And there were these two other guys there.

They were younger than me.

And they used to have to

wrestle each other,

to show how manly they were.

And if they weren't

hitting each other hard enough,

then,

the guy who ran the camps,

the one who helped out,

he'd go in and physically...

throw the punch!

Like that!

Like...

like that!

It's more like, like,

probably like, like that.

Or, or he'd hit me right there, right up there.

They deserve to feel the pain.

They deserve to feel

that guilt for the rest of their lives.

For what they've done, you know.

I will never understand how someone can disown

their own child, you know.

Their own flesh and blood.

Baffles me.

Which way are we going.

cos it's a bit,

I just get a little bit anxious if it's too close.

I love cameras.

Because they capture things you'd never know about.

If you didn't have a camera.

I don't know what I'd do without it.

I'd be lost.

A lot of people would say what I do is, sick!

But,

they don't know me.

So, how can they say

what I do is weird.

Cos...

they don't know me, erm.

It's always people that

you know, they don't really

know you and they judge you, and all that, and

they're the one that get on my nerves.

You got two down there as well.

But I'll show you those

afterwards I think.

So I film suicides.

People would probably call me the suicide watcher,

if they, if they knew what I did.

They never would because I'm very good

at what I do.

Erm, never get caught.

And that's the secret to it.

You, you never get caught.

Erm,

so yeah.

So basically I have a contracted servicing place.

To help assist

people, in their, in their suicide.

So I'll film them, you know,

sort of swinging,

suppose we could just say swinging, erm,

and er,

I will then

capture that

with my camera

and I will send that on to...

to the relative, or family member that, that disowned them.

Suicide is a very personal thing.

But, some people want it witnessed.

They probably just don't want to be alone I suppose.

You know.

When they do it.

And that brings me peace,

makes me feel,

that I'm, you know,

giving back to them and making them

carrying out their wishes to

get a message across.

I like the secret part of it.

Being an eye witness.

My mum used to say to me

"Stop reading those creepy books you know...

you'll make yourself not very well!"

But I wasn't reading the books.

I was just looking at the pictures.

The number you have dialed has not been recognised...

please check and dial again.

My girlfriend

erm, ex girlfriend,

she made me go.

She found inappropriate

pornography on my phone.

Man and man.

She said "You better not embarrass us!"

So I...

I went and

the guy who runs the conversion,

showed himself to me.

And that just confused me even more.

I did, I did wait outside a house once,

after a drop.

The guy was very handsome.

His eyes had come out of their sockets.

And I just couldn't wait for them to see

the footage.

I've ever heard