Marmaduke

High school.

Look familiar? Yeah.

Being a teenager, it can be rough,

I'm not gonna lie to you.

But if you're a teenager, and the world doesn't fit you,

you're totally hosed!

Oh, Mr. Pit... Oh, Mr. Pit...

Mr. Pitiful

Who let you down?

Who let you down? Who let you down?

And the harder you try to fit in,

the more awkward it gets.

Oh, Mr. Pit... Oh, Mr. Pit...

Mr. Pitiful

Who let you down?

Look at this poor guy.

Brutal!

Who let you down? Who let you down?

But if you think being a big, awkward teenager

is about the worst thing that can happen to you,

try being a 200-pound teenage dog

with a radar dish wrapped around your neck!

Oh, yeah, that'll make me real popular.

Luckily, they're easy to take off. Watch this.

Marmaduke! Told you!

Where are you?

Hold your horses.

I'm Marmaduke, by the way. I get yelled at a lot.

Come on, let's meet the fam. The two-leggers.

You're gonna love them.

Here I come!

This little Padawan here is Brian.

Like most kids his age, he loves to hang out with me.

Come on, buddy. I can't see!

Yeah, I'm pretty busy myself. I'll catch you later.

And this social butterfly here is Barbara.

She loves to play ball with me.

Okay, Barb, you throw and I catch.

He can be like that.

Not like that.

Is somebody cooking?

Food!

Debbie's pretty cool, and my main food hook-up.

She slips me a steak here, some turkey there.

Which is why I think she doesn't even care when I help myself.

Come to daddy.

Ahhh! Hot cheese! Oh, hot cheese!

Marmaduke!

The little one's Sarah.

How cute is she? And she's my biggest fan.

You know, it's important for them to get exercise at this age,

so I try to take her for a walk every day.

She's got a great laugh, doesn't she?

Then there's my owner, Phil.

He's a marketing guy for a local pet food company.

I call him Doctor No sometimes,

'cause it's nothing but rules with him.

No slobbering.

No barking. No tackling the mailman.

Here, let's see if he says no to this awesome hole I'm digging.

Marmaduke, no!

See? Doctor No in the house.

Why don't you just give it a chance?

I will find China!

What you're doing is cruel and unusual.

I hate water. Come on. Sit.

Look, everybody's got a weakness. Sit.

Mine's water. It's my kryptonite. Sit.

Not sitting in this tub. Sit, sit, sit.

Sit, Marmaduke!

What can I say? I'm a sucker for the kid.

Bye-bye.

Phil hates that.

Hey, Sarah, where you going?

Stay.

There's nothing good about getting a bath, except for this!

Come on, Phil! Not again.

Marmaduke!

Let's go! (WHOOPS)

Marmaduke!

I like to give Phil a little exercise, too.

He's cooped up in the office all day. Come on, Phil.

That's the spirit! Get back here!

Over here!

Come here, through here, Phil! I'm over here!

Yeah, come on!

Not this time...

You don't grab a tiger by the tail!

Marmaduke!

Someone call the ASPCA!

We got a crazy dog on the loose!

Freedom!

Hey, Dad. What are you doing?

(GROANING) Would it kill them to install a new dog door?

I was two months old when they got this.

I guess I had more pull before the growth spurt. Cue flashback.

Oh, he's so cute!

(CHUCKLES) See? Insanely cute.

Look at that lovable little Marma-pup.

Come here, you!

But when you grow up into this, I get it. Not pretty.

I'd ignore me, too. Get back here!

Hey, I'm talking here!

Anyway, I try not to hold things against Phil.

After all, he's only human.

That's why I make it a point to never go to bed hungry.

Let's see what we've got.

Sausage from last week's barbecue,

gonna need to let that breathe a few days.

This is our shot. California, the big leagues.

In the big leagues, they take steroids and cheat with supermodels.

It's a marketing job with an organic pet food company.

I think we'll be okay.

Pepperoni pizza.

Phil's loafer? No, I'll save it for dessert.

And that, I have no idea what that is.

Aren't we okay in Kansas?

Is that what we wanna be? Just okay?

Coming in for a landing.

I wanna give you and the kids the life you deserve.

I want a bigger house

with a bedroom that doesn't smell like a meat-locker.

This is our shot.

Well, if this is our shot, then we should take it.

But you have to tell the kids.

Done.

Give me that.

Oh! Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Hey, I wasn't done with that!

You don't have to worry, I've got my supermodel right here.

Wow!

Wait for it... Wait for it...

Marmaduke! Marmaduke!

What did you eat?

I know it's juvenile, but it's all I've got.

So, there you have it.

Day in the life of old Marmaduke, here.

It's really bad!

Guys, I am sorry.

That was a little much, even for me.

Bad Marmaduke.

All right, enough. Lights out.

Waffles, waffles, waffles, waffles, waffles!

Yes!

Saturday morning waffles! Got to love the Debster!

Take it easy, man!

A waffle is to be savored, not inhaled!

Hey, this is my step-bro, Carlos, by the way.

Say hey, Carlos. Hey, Carlos.

He's pretty cool for a cat, which helps,

since he's basically my only friend.

You ready for a bombshell?

Lay it on me.

Phil just told everybody he got a new job.

We're moving to the O.C.!

Shut up! Really?

No lie! I was so shocked, I hacked that thing up.

Carlos, that's gross!

I know it's gonna take time to adjust, honey,

but you'll make so many new friends there.

I think it sounds kind of cool.

What do you care? All you do is play video games.

This is so unfair!

I got to say, I'm with Barbara on this one.

You know how many bones I buried in the backyard?

Guys, this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

We'll have a big new house with a pool and a company car.

Pets are always the last to find out!

I don't even know where the O.C.'s at!

Okay, what's the deal? Is it something I said?

Something you weren't supposed to say.

Does anyone even own a pet in this place?

I haven't seen a single dog so far.

It's kind of hard to forgive you if you don't mean it...

Oh! She's fine.

Okay, so far, all I've learned about The O. C. is that

no one has a pet and Seth, here, is a total drama queen.

You're the biggest drama queen, amigo.

Me? That's you, Carlos.

You're, like, 200 pounds of drama, with a red collar!

Oh, really? This conversation is over.

No, no, no!

Ejector seat. Never fails.

And so, moving day arrived.

And there was a feeling of hope

and excitement for the whole family.

Even Barbara was trying to lend a hand.

That's mine...

Carlos and I would have pitched in, too,

but we were being shipped air freight and on lockdown!

Hey, let me out of here. I'm not an animal!

Oh, yeah, I am.

Look what I got. Debbie's meatballs!

That's my man, Phil!

There you go.

Looking out for his own.

I don't know, Carlos. Something's fishy here.

It's Debbie's meatballs, man. Don't question it!