iCarly

Hey, Carly. Hey, sam.

Watch me take off my glasses.

Cool.

I give "glasses with feet girl" an eight.

I give her a nine.

Seven.

But I give freddie a negative 2.

For what?

Just for being you.

You know, they say

When a girl constantly rips on a guy,

it really just means she has a crush on him.

Yeah, but I wasn't rippin' on a guy.

I was rippin' on you.

Oh, yeah?

That's right.

Hey, quit it, you two.

We gotta get through this

and pick videos for our next webcast.

Okay.

Here's one from a kid Named, andy, who has a turtle.

Playin'.

Hi, icarly,

and this is my pet turtle,

his name is doctor Nub.

Doctor Nub?

No way that turtle went to med school.

Roll over, Doctor Nub.

Come on, boy, roll over.

Ta-daa.

Zero.

Lame.

Negative nine.

Next.

Okay.

Here's one from two guys both named chris.

What-up, carly and sam?

What is up, yo?

I'm chris.

And i'm also chris.

And we're best buds.

BFBs.

I like chris,

But chris kind of creeps me out.

Not only are we best buds.

We're also the world's greatest meat drummers.

Meat drummers?

Okay, this is great. Ten.

Ten.

And the best friend meat drummers gets to be on iCarly.

Yo, meat drummers.

Hey, speaking of best friends,

you know what today is?

The 25th?

Yup.

No way.

What's the 25th?

The five-year anniversary of when sam and I first met.

Yup. I remember it like it was only five years ago.

Hey, I'm Sam.

Hi, I'm Carly.

Can I have that sandwich?

No way, get your own.

You're all right.

Wow. So, even back then,

you were obnoxious and aggressive.

Yeah.

Can you believe we became friends a tuna sandwich?

And now, you hate tuna.

No.

I hate the way that british chick

In our history class says "tuna."

Oh, yeah.

Tyooon-uh.

Oh, I just adore tyoooon-uh.

Tyooon-uh.

Yeah, don't play along, all right?

Anyway, since it's our friendship anniversary,

I got you a little somethin'.

Wait, you got me a present?

Ta-daa.

Oh, you shouldn't have gotten--gimme it.

Whoa, you got me an iCarly t-shirt.

Look on the back.

Oh, it's our heads.

In shirt form.

This is so insane.

Oh, it's no big deal.

Oh, please. I love this.

How great are you?

I don't know.

Very?

Hey, you know what i'm gonna get you?

Oh, you don't have to get me--

Tickets to the Cuddlefish concert for next Friday night.

You and me, kid.

Well, that'd be awesome.

But, that concert's been sold out for months.

You let me worry about that.

I got ways, Carly Shay.

And you know what else i got?

Pimples on your butt?

He was smart to run.

In five, four, three, two.

I know you see.

Somehow the world will change for me

and be so wonderful.

Live life, breathe air.

I know somehow we're gonna get there.

and feel so wonderful.

It's all for all real.

I'm telling you just how I feel.

So wake up the members of my nation.

It's your time to be.

There's no chance unless you take one.

And the time to see the better side of every situation.

Some things are meant to be.

So give it your best

and leave the rest to me.

Leave it all to me.

Leave it all to me.

Just leave it all to me.

iCarly S01E17 iDon't Want to Fight

Is Sam gone?

Yeah, she left.

Good.

Then I won't be needing this.

I like this song.

Pretty romantic, huh?

You feelin' the mood?

Yeah, I'm feeling the mood.

I'm sad.

Why?

I was just at a funeral.

In the bathroom?

Yeah.

It's for my fish, reggie.

I loved that little guy.

Even as I dropped his lifeless carcass

into the toilet.

You forgot to feed him again, didn't you?

I'm not good with pets that eat on a regular basis.

You're lucky you know how to use the microwave.

I know, or else

I'd be waving goodbye from spencer's toilet.

All right. You just wait.

I'm gonna prove to you

that I can be a good, responsible fish owner.

No, you're not getting another fish.

All right.

Starting right now.

I will not get another fish.

Move.

Why?

Move.

I don't see--okay.

You already bought another fish.

His name is swimmy.

Could you step back a few feet?

I get asked that a lot.

Hey, rodney,

Can you hook me up with somethin'?

Sure, but I'm with a customer right now.

So, you gotta wait.

Hurry.

Ah. how about these?

Whoa, Laotian tissues.

They're made from real peacock feathers.

Peacocks.

Twenty bucks.

Twenty?

You care about your nose or not?

You swear they're laotian?

Guaranteed.

I'll take 'em.

Look at my foreign tissues.

Yes, your snot is very lucky. Bye.

So soft.

Nice shirt.

iCarly. Awesome web show.

Thanks.

You guys sell those shirts?

Nah, this is one of a kind.

Listen, I need concert tickets.

You came to the right place.

I got Flaming Teeth,

Backflesh, Yellow Day.

Cuddlefish. This Friday.

That's a tough get.

How much?

Hundred bucks.

A hundred?

Each.

Well, I see why they call you Rip-off Rodney.

It's hurtful, yet appropriate.

Whatever. Forget it.

I don't have 200 bucks.

Wait.

You up for a trade?

What do you want?