Inside Men

'It's a counting house. I make sure it all tallies up.'

I need my money.

Wheels are in motion.

'What does that even mean, "Wheels are in motion"?'

Going to make us rich again?

Don't.

Buy me a drink?

Yeah, sure.

'Looks like we're going to be 50 down.

'Not a good month, John.'

When I find out who's responsible I'll...

You'll what?

We only took a couple grand, see for yourself.

If you're going to do it, if you're going

to cross that line, has to be worth it.

What if we took the lot?

My husband's not a hero.

Open it! No.

Go, go, go, go!

I'm going to do your knees and then your elbows.

We're full, let's go!

Something went wrong.

You didn't get it? We got it.

We got it all but, Chris. He was hurt.

Shot.

By who?

I don't know who, and I don't know why.

Is he dead?

'What do you remember?

'How much do you retain?

'This is when the real work begins.

'This is when you have to be strong.

'This is when they think they know you.

'But they don't.

'They can't.'

All persons accounted for. One male...

I'll need some new swabs, Steve.

Swabs.

I'll need the saw next, please. Thank you.

Christopher Lebdon! Christopher Lebdon!

Are you related to Mr Lebdon?

'The robbery took place late last night

'and it's thought an extremely large sum of money was taken.'

'Police haven't yet given details

'of how the gang broke into the counting house,

'nor how many were involved.

'We expect more information at the press conference this morning.'

Hello?

Dita?

OK, calm down.

What's happened?

Here we are, sir.

'Confirm subject is approaching hotel.' Confirmed. Over.

'..Released yet, but early indications suggest that the number

'is going to be big, perhaps the biggest cash robbery in UK history.'

Hey. Hey...

It's all over, promise you. I promise you.

It's all over.

'..What we do know is that the gang was heavily armed

'and several shots were fired.'

We don't have to do this. Yes, we do.

We can go, me and you, take off. Who knows what he'll say if he wakes up?

We have a plan and we're sticking to it.

Tell me this wasn't your fault. Of course it wasn't!

Excuse me.

You poor baby.

Question eight. What s-superhero did actress Linda Carter p-p-p...

Spit it out, John!

Play from 1976 to 1979.

Was it W-W-Wonder Woman?

Question nine, in what sport do players take long and short corners?

What?

Question 10.

Need a lift?

No thank you, I'm still sober.

You could always down a few and jump in with us.

I'm in no rush.

I promised I'd give a couple of the guys a lift.

See you tomorrow. Night.

Here you go, mate. Thanks.

Finish your drinks, please! Fancy going on somewhere after this?

I know a good titty bar we can get into.

We've got other plans.

What, just the two of you? Romantic meal somewhere?

A kebab and a bumming down an alleyway?

You jealous?

I think you're his type, he's been eyeing you up.

Can you two leave it out for a change?

Finish your drinks, please.

Right, I'll leave you boys to johnny up and get sweaty, then.

You'll be thinking about that all night, won't you? Me? No.

I'll be in the titty bar

putting a pound coin in your girlfriend's pot.

Leave it, leave it, leave it! Leave it.

Good night, benders.

Why d'you always let him wind you up like that?

We need a place to meet.

We can't keep doing this every time we want to talk.

I thought it was a pretty successful quiz night, to be fair.

What is that? Sarcasm?

Sorry, comes out after a few beers.

There are things we need and things we need to do.

Our first task should be to... delegate those items.

Should someone be taking minutes on this? Just let him talk.

The plan's pretty simple, as far as I see it.

We set up a dummy collection, load up with as much as we can,

then get the hell out of Dodge.

No, that won't... that won't work.

It'll take 'em all of three minutes to connect it back to us.

By which time, we'll be long gone.

No, we cannot run. That is not the way.

Agreed.

I'm not doing this cos I want to move to Brazil.

All right, Mr Bigshot. What's your plan?

See, normally a job like this...

will start on the outside and then they'll recruit someone...

well, someone like us. We're approaching it arse about tit.

So far we have three men on the inside

and no-one on the outside.

We need labourers.

Is that something you can help us with, Chris?

Why are you asking me? I might know someone.

Who? Let me sound it out first. Friend or family?

Just let me test the water. I won't give out any specifics.

Can I ask a question? Shoot.

When are we supposed to be doing this? A week from now?

A year from now?

Soon as possible.

September.

Six months.

And you don't think we should have a vote on this?

The Southampton site is due to close in late August.

A third of their business is going to be taken on by us.

So, more cash in the vault.

Plus, any amalgamation could create confusion in the interim period.

Fine, September. I'll mark it in the diary.

I wouldn't...

It was a joke!

Right, listen.

If I am going to talk to these guys, I'm going to need some play money.

I thought you were just going to sound them out?

I am.

But I want to show I'm serious.

If I can prove to them that I can get something out.

Well, how much?

A couple of bundles should do.

What? You think I'm going to do a bunk?

We have to put it straight back. We can't miss an audit.

I might only press a couple of buttons for a living,

but I'm not stupid.

OK.

OK, but I will get it out.

All right.

See you in the morning, campers.

'Ey! 'Ey!

I thought you two were friends.

We are.

But he doesn't know about your father?

What do you know?

You're a security guard in a cash warehouse, Chris.

Your background was checked the moment I employed you.

I assume nothing's changed in that time.

Gordon, what a surprise.

Not stopping you from doing anything, am I?

No, no, no. No, not at all.

How do you feel about the North West?

Of what?

Of England. It's a region.

I'm not sure.

Well, be sure.

Be certain that you love it and are prepared to move your family there.

Harriet Lynne is leaving for health reasons.

I don't know what that means, but I assume it's cancerous.

I've been asked to suggest a few replacements, promoting from within.

I've given them two names.

You and Mr AN Other.

Really?

The other guy's a dead cert, but I wanted to put you forward

to make him look better in his interview.

Right, right.

I'm joking with you! Lighten up and brighten up.

Be a few extra quid in your pocket.

Come in handy with another mouth to feed.

Thanks.

Night, Chris. Night.

Three days, no longer.

Gina!

'Posh Chinese on a Tuesday. I'm spoiling you.'

It's cold.

I'll take that as a compliment.

Be a love and nuke it.

I don't want to go down downstairs, I'm cosy.

Don't make me walk around, I'll get sticky thighs.

You are a class bird.

Just try one of these.

I don't want a cold pork ball! You're ruining the moment.

What moment? This moment.

There we go.

Someone's fried a gift into me food.

What a brilliant surprise!