So Random!

Give it up for the casts of "so random!"

Hey everybody. We've got a great show for you tonight.

Yeah, Amy and Charlie Duncan from Goold Luck Charlie are here.

So give it up for Leigh-Allyn Baker.

And Mia Talerico!

- Where are they? - She's taking a nap.

- Okay, excuse us for just a minute. Okay. - One second.

- Yes, you're coming. Come on. - We'll be right back.

Hey, wake up. It's show time.

Yeah, we've got your sippy cup of warm milk.

And your favorite stuffed animal.

Oh, it's open. Let's go.

Shh, she's napping. She's napping.

Aww, she's so cute all curled up.

Oh, she's such a little angel.

- Come on, wake her up. We've got a show to do. - I ain't waking her up.

I'll do it.

- Get up. - Who's there?

What do you want? How dare you?

- Oh oh oh. - I...

Yay, milky time!

We've got a great show for you tonight.

Pia toscano is here.

Mia, you get to meet Pia.

Mine.

All important questions.

But the most important is...

This is "why? With Mia."

Please welcome donald trump!

Let me just say it's a honor for you to have me on your show.

Why?

Because people want to know what the Donald has to say.

Which is why so many people tune into.

My very successful tv show "the apprentice"

In which I fire people for the huge fun of it.

Why?

Why not?

Why?

I did not see that coming.

Why?

Most people just want to know about my hair.

Why?

Because everyone wants to know why it looks like this.

Why?

You want to know? You really want to know?

Okay, I was walking through central park.

When a bird fell out of a tree into my hair,

Built a nest. I liked the way it looked.

Why?

Because the squirrels that lived in there looked ridiculous.

And I like the sound of chirping in the morning.

Why?

'cause no one else will chirp to me, okay?

Why?

Why? Why?

'cause I'm the kind of guy who goes on tv and fires people.

You know who should be fired? Me.

Donald Trump, you're fired.

Why?

For being a mean mean man.

Oh, wait a second. It's feeding time.

Here you go, little birdies.

There you go.

This has been "Why? With Mia."

Join us next time on...

Hi! It's me... Fred. Argh!

- Why? - I like talk shows.

- Why? - And I like toddlers.

- Why? - And I like toddlers who have talk shows.

Argh!

- Why? - Oh my gosh.

- Why? - Whaa!

- Why? - I'm Fred. I'm Fred. I'm Fred.

Why why why why why?

I'm Fred.

Oh my gosh.

Check your local listings.

Welcome to north mid-valley South high.

Cheerleader squad tryouts.

Thanks for the welcome. Ready? Set.

Okay, Billy.

Come on, I told you last time when you tried out.

You just aren't ready for the squad yet.

Oh, but it's a new day. Ready? Set.

Five, six, seven and eight.

Hi. I'm Billy. Go Billy!

And I still want to be a cheerleader. Go cheerleading!

I've got the talent, coordination.

And energy to keep a crowd on its feet.

Let me hear you say, "crowd on its feet."

Go crowd on its feet!

Some people say if you want to be noticed.

By the head of the pyramid... kristy Walker...

You have to be an athlete just like my brother Steve.

Go athletes!

So I tried out for the track team,

The baseball team and the football team.

Go rejections!

But that's okay because cheerleading is my sport.

Go backup plan! I just know.

If kristy Walker sees me cheering,

It'll change everything.

Go unrealistic expectations!

I will literally pay you $50.

If you let me be on the squad.

Go bribery! So what do you say?

No one has to know I paid.

Go our little secret!

Oh.

Oh, you probably shouldn't do that.

Congratulations, you did surprise me.

A good surprise?

You got worse.

In a good way?

Goodbye, Billy.

Does that mean I'm on the squad?

Next!

And I look forward to cheering with you.

Yay, I'm number one.

Billy.

Keep it.

Pardon me, do you happen to have any anti-dia...?

Hello, Tommy.

Oh hi, Ms. Stone.

You know, I have to say, excellent class today.

You sure make history fun.

Yes, well, thank you, thank you.

Oh hey, this is my teacher.

- She's my history teacher Ms. Stone. - Hello.

Oh, I'm sorry. You were asking about anti-dia-something.

- No, I was not. - Anti-dia...

- I was not. I was not. - Anti-di...

- I was not. - All right, my bad. That's cool. That's cool.

- I'm gonna start scanning your items. - Well, about that...

All right, we've got one industrial-size package of toilet paper.

Well, Tommy, it's not all for me.

Well, I hope not,

'cause that is a whole lot of t.P.

You know, in fact I don't even use toilet paper.

- Oh, well... - I don't use it.

Different strokes, you know?

Different people... different kinds of strokes.

Let's see. We've got a 12-pack.

Of burly man bathroom air freshener.

You know, I've got to say, I love the ads for these.

"ooh, gnarly smells.

Come out of burly men."

Yes yes, well, you know, that's not for me either.

- Oh. - No, I have a...

I have a burly neighbor downstairs.

Oh cool, you're picking it up for him...

- The burly neighbor downstairs? - Yes yes yes.

So nice. So nice.

Oh wait, it's not scanning. One sec.

Can someone please have a price check.

On burly man bathroom air freshener?

That is the 12-pack... not the one-pack, but the 12-pack.

Oh oh oh.

No. Oh, never mind. It's fine.

Never mind. Forget about that price check.

For the 12-pack... not the one, but the 12.

You know what, boys? I'm just gonna use the self-checkout Lane.

We've got a four-pack, industrial backup plungers.

"for when you've got to go,

But you've gone too much."

- Wow, Tommy. - And scene.

And scene, yes.

All that tv watching has really paid off.

Yeah, I know, I know. I kind of know, like, every commercial.

Wow. Let's see.

We've got some anti-fungal cream.

Oh my goodness, how did that get in my basket? That's crazy.

You know what's crazy? What's crazy.

Is paying full price for that.

Do you have the coupon for that?

No, I don't know how it got into my basket.

- I have no idea. It's very hot in here, Tommy. - One second.

Can someone please bring me the coupon.

For big nasty itch anti-fungal cream?

I got your back, Ms. S.

Yes, good looking out.

Hey guys, I need that coupon for the big nasty itch cream.

I've got a teacher down here that has big nasty itches and she...

No no no, not for me. Not for me.

I don't itch. I've never itched a day in my life.

I don't know what itching feels like or even looks like.

So you just continue doing what you're doing.

And ignore everything that this person is saying.

You should really do something.

About that sweating problem, Ms. Stone.

I'm just going to pay for this and I'm going to leave.

Congratulations, Ms. Stone.

You're our millionth customer.

This is so good.

All right, okay, here. We'll take a picture.