2 Guns

Hi. - Hi.

How many?

Two.

Listen, I wanted to get a safe deposit box. Can you do that for me?

Okay. Your box will be available

any time from an hour after opening

to 30 minutes before close. This is your key.

Thank you.

Oh, um, also, if you open a checking account,

we'll give you 5% off the box along with free overdraft protection.

Oh, here I was hopin' for a free toaster.

Why would a bank give out free toasters?

Hello, Ma.

I'm ordering you the French toast.

No, thank you.

Our very patient waitress, Maggie,

well, at least it says Maggie on her name tag,

has asked me to order four times.

If I don't order at this point, it's just rude.

I can come back. - No, it's okay.

You know what? I'm making an executive decision.

Pancakes. - Okay.

No pancakes. I don't like pancakes. No pancakes.

What are you, a communist?

My friend'll have the pancakes and a fried egg.

I'm thinkin' hash, but only if it's like chunky style, okay?

Listen, if you order me eggs and pancakes, I'm gonna kick your behind.

But you gotta eat breakfast. It's the most important meal of the day.

Uh, ma'am, ignore everything he said, okay?

Don't bring me any eggs and pancakes.

Just bring me some coffee and bring him a couple eggs.

I don't want eggs. I want hash.

You know what, put a couple eggs on it.

Give him some rye toast, too.

No rye toast for me. I don't like rye toast.

And a pancake. - No pancakes.

Maybe a little silver-dollar one. You got the little baby ones?

No pancakes, no silver dollars, no rye toast. I like pumpernickel.

I do have pumpernickel. Pumpernickel toast.

Hey, Maggie, wait. One more thing. - Yeah.

That's for you. You take that with you till we see each other again

in case you miss me too much, okay?

Why you gotta do that? - What?

Wink at the waitresses like that?

Waitresses like me. - Nobody likes you.

So? - So.

What do ya got?

So, it is a sleepy bank.

Doable? - That's correct.

I told you.

That is a lot of doughnuts.

I'll be right back with your hash.

Maggie, your hot homemade doughnuts, they any good?

Best in three counties. - I'll tell you what you do.

You bring us three of those bad boys.

Put'em in a to-go box for us, all right?

All right. - Thank you.

All right, time to make the move.

All right, there's gonna be some sirens in this bitch.

I'm gonna go shake the weasel.

Shake the weasel. Gonna go shake the weasel.

Hey. Good morning, sir. How are you? - Morning.

Hey, Maggie.

I'm very sorry about my friend.

He was kicked in the head as a child.

He's really not that bad. - No, he is.

What's goin' on?

Okay, I'm just gonna have you all exit the building.

It might be a false alarm, but just do it safely.

Thank you. Thank you.

Is everybody out? I'm gonna need you to step outside.

All right, Maggie, I'm just gonna grab my friend.

Okay. - We gotta pay our bill.

We should go.

Is that all you're gonna leave for a tip?

It's 15%. You leave 15%.

No, you gotta leave at least 30.

No, you don't. 15% is standard.

My Maggie's about to be out of a job, man. Don't be cheap.

Okay, there's five. That's seven.

There you go. Come on.

All right.

What? No, you didn't.

Yes, I did. - Oh, my God.

How'd you say it?

Never rob a bank across from the diner

with the best doughnuts in three counties?

That's correct.

Bobby. Papi's down in the stables.

Why don't you get somethin' to eat?

I'm not hungry.

Sure you are. - I wanna come with you.

Hey, listen. We're here to do business. Diplomatically.

Well, I can be diplomatic.

You can be hungry, too, right?

Bobby.

Wait here. - Okay.

Somebody sittin' here?

Little Toro.

Oh, well, you move your feet, you lose your seat, right?

Lose your head, too. - That's correct.

So, where is Little Toro?

Allli, where you put him.

Aqui? - Alli.

Let's play some dominoes.

Papi's ready. - Yeah.

Papi Greco!

"I-know-a-guy" Bobby.

That's correct.

Quick, an ostrich, a tank of ether, a '63 Impala convertible.

Make it a '64.

My side of the border.

I know a guy.

What did I tell you? He never says no, never says maybe,

never says, "I'll see what I can do."

Nice bull.

I hope he's a good breeder.

That's a shame about Little Toro.

Julio caught him skimming.

Oh.

That don't sound like Little Toro.

Is that for me? That's correct.

Everybody skims a little cream. It's human nature.

Just 'cause it's human don't mean you let it go.

Hmm.

Nice lines. Good color.

That's right.

He knows a guy.

What you got for me?

Cash.

Cash?

Supposed to be givin' me 100,000 to deal.

Why didn't you give me $100,000 worth of cocaine?

Where's the cocaine?

My buyer wants cocaine.

So let him buy cocaine.

That's what he's tryin' to do. He's trying to buy cocaine.

I told him I knew a guy, therefore I come to you.

You the guy I know. That's why I told him.

So take back the passports.

After Little Toro, we're not takin' on any new customers.

Well, no disrespect, but I ain't no new customer.

You been dealin' with me for a long time.

You keep the passports.

Keep the money, too.

When you're ready to give me the product, give me the product.

Till then...

You owe me.

It's not very sporting, man.

At least give the chickens a chance to shoot back.

Hey, man, I'm just sayin'. If I'm gonna kill a defenseless animal,

I'm gonna honor its sacrifice by grilling it into some tasty barbecue.

What I'm not gonna do is torture it

just to prove I can't hit anything further away than my own pecker.

Your cuate's a real junkyard dog. - Mmm.

Hey, cowboy. You, the pretty one.

You ever hear the expression, "You got a face only a mother can love"?

That don't apply to you. You are uglier than the devil's asshole itself.

Stig!

What are you doin'?

They're torturing chickens, man.

What are you eatin'?

A chicken.

Come here. It's not the same thing, okay?

See that bag over there by the table?

Buffet table next to the potato salad.

Yeah, the bowling bag. What about it?

Little Tom's head is in that bag.

Bullshit. - Yeah.

You know what? That's fucked up, man.

Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa. Let's go. Okay? Come on, let's go.

Say it in English, you goat fuck.

Suck my chicken.

That's funny comin' from you, fat boy.

You ain't seen your pecker since you were a baby.

Just 'cause you put your finger in your belly button

and brown shit comes out don't mean it's your asshole.

What did you say? - Don't worry about it, man.

Now dig 'em up and make some damn barbecue.

Bye, chica.

Did you just wink at him?

I did wink at him, 'cause he's my bitch now.

Uh... oh!

That's good shootin'. - Gracias.

You know, Little Toro never did nothin' to nobody, man.

We should rip off Papi's stash at the Tres Cruces Savings and Loan.

You know, Papi's guy delivers a briefcase

full of money to Tres Cruces every two weeks.

That's gotta add up to, what, like three million at least.

If Papi knew we were even talkin' about rippin' off Tres Cruces,

it would be our heads in that bag next to the potato salad.

No way. Our two heads would never fit in a bag that small.

Come on, man, let's hit the bank.

Little Toro was your friend. He was my friend.

So? - What do you mean "so"?

What if it was me? What if it was my head Papi ran through the saw mill?

You wouldn't come after him? - Nope.

You wouldn't kill him? - Nope.

Shit, man, he did that to you, I'd kill him. You know why I'd kill him?

Because you're my people and there's a code.