Saturday Night Live

¶ ¶ i heard there was a secret chord that david played and it

¶ i heard there was a secret chord that david played and it pleased the lord ¶

chord that david played and it pleased the lord ¶ ¶ but you don't really care for

pleased the lord ¶ ¶ but you don't really care for music do ya ¶

¶ but you don't really care for music do ya ¶ ¶ well it goes like this the

music do ya ¶ ¶ well it goes like this the fourth the fifth the minor fall

¶ well it goes like this the fourth the fifth the minor fall and the major lift ¶

fourth the fifth the minor fall and the major lift ¶ ¶ the baffled king composing

and the major lift ¶ ¶ the baffled king composing hallelujah ¶

¶ the baffled king composing hallelujah ¶ ¶ hallelujah hallelujah

hallelujah ¶ ¶ hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah ¶

¶ hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah ¶ ¶

hallelujah hallelujah ¶ ¶ ¶ maybe i've been here before

¶ ¶ maybe i've been here before i've seen this room and i've

¶ maybe i've been here before i've seen this room and i've walked this floor ¶

i've seen this room and i've walked this floor ¶ ¶ i used to live alone before i

walked this floor ¶ ¶ i used to live alone before i ya ¶

¶ i used to live alone before i ya ¶ ¶ i've seen your flag on the

ya ¶ ¶ i've seen your flag on the marble arch and love is not a

¶ i've seen your flag on the marble arch and love is not a victory march ¶

marble arch and love is not a victory march ¶ ¶ it's a cold and it's a broken

victory march ¶ ¶ it's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah ¶

¶ it's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah ¶ ¶ hallelujah hallelujah

hallelujah ¶ ¶ hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah ¶

¶ hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah ¶ ¶ i did my best it wasn't much i

hallelujah hallelujah ¶ ¶ i did my best it wasn't much i couldn't feel so i tried to

¶ i did my best it wasn't much i couldn't feel so i tried to touch ¶

couldn't feel so i tried to touch ¶ ¶ told the truth i didn't come

touch ¶ ¶ told the truth i didn't come to fool ya ¶

¶ told the truth i didn't come to fool ya ¶ ¶ and even though it all went

to fool ya ¶ ¶ and even though it all went wrong i'll stand before the lord

¶ and even though it all went wrong i'll stand before the lord of song ¶

wrong i'll stand before the lord of song ¶ ¶ with nothing on my tongue but

of song ¶ ¶ with nothing on my tongue but hallelujah ¶

¶ with nothing on my tongue but hallelujah ¶ ¶ hallelujah hallelujah

hallelujah ¶ ¶ hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah ¶

¶ hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah ¶ ¶ hallelujah hallelujah ¶

hallelujah hallelujah ¶ ¶ hallelujah hallelujah ¶ ¶ hallelujah hallelujah ¶

¶ hallelujah hallelujah ¶ ¶ hallelujah hallelujah ¶ >> i'm not giving up, and

¶ hallelujah hallelujah ¶ >> i'm not giving up, and neither should you.

>> i'm not giving up, and neither should you. and live from new york, it's

neither should you. and live from new york, it's saturday night!

and live from new york, it's saturday night!

saturday night! ¶

¶ >> it's "saturday night live."

¶ >> it's "saturday night live." with --

>> it's "saturday night live." with -- vanessa bayer.

with -- vanessa bayer. beck bennett.

vanessa bayer. beck bennett. aidy bryant.

beck bennett. aidy bryant. michael che.

aidy bryant. michael che. pete davidson.

michael che. pete davidson. leslie jones.

pete davidson. leslie jones. colin jost.

leslie jones. colin jost. kate mckinnon.

colin jost. kate mckinnon. kyle mooney.

kate mckinnon. kyle mooney. bobby moynihan.

kyle mooney. bobby moynihan. cecily strong.

bobby moynihan. cecily strong. kenan thompson.

cecily strong. kenan thompson. sasheer zamata.

kenan thompson. sasheer zamata. featuring mikey day.

sasheer zamata. featuring mikey day. alex moffat.

featuring mikey day. alex moffat. melissa villasenor.

alex moffat. melissa villasenor. musical guest a tribe called

melissa villasenor. musical guest a tribe called quest.

musical guest a tribe called quest. and your host dave chappelle.

quest. and your host dave chappelle. ¶

and your host dave chappelle. ¶ ladies and gentlemen,

¶ ladies and gentlemen, dave chappelle!

ladies and gentlemen, dave chappelle! ¶

dave chappelle! ¶ ¶

¶ ¶

¶ >> thank you.

>> thank you. thank you very much.

>> thank you. thank you very much.

thank you very much. thank you again.

thank you again. you know, been a long time.

thank you again. you know, been a long time. it's been a long time.

you know, been a long time. it's been a long time. so please be patient.

it's been a long time. so please be patient. you know, i didn't know that

so please be patient. you know, i didn't know that donald trump was going to win

you know, i didn't know that donald trump was going to win the election.

donald trump was going to win the election. i did suspect it.

the election. i did suspect it. seemed like hillary was doing

i did suspect it. seemed like hillary was doing well in the polls and yet -- i

seemed like hillary was doing well in the polls and yet -- i know the whites.

well in the polls and yet -- i know the whites.

know the whites. you guys aren't as surprised as

you guys aren't as surprised as you used to be.

you guys aren't as surprised as you used to be. and i think i speak for all of

you used to be. and i think i speak for all of black america when i say that we

and i think i speak for all of black america when i say that we are all praying for amerosa.

black america when i say that we are all praying for amerosa. i don't even know what she's

are all praying for amerosa. i don't even know what she's doing in the news.

i don't even know what she's doing in the news. but america's done it.

doing in the news. but america's done it. we've actually elected an

but america's done it. we've actually elected an internet troll as our president.

we've actually elected an internet troll as our president. the whites are serious.

internet troll as our president. the whites are serious. never seen anything like it.

the whites are serious. never seen anything like it. haven't seen whites this mad

never seen anything like it. haven't seen whites this mad since o.j.

haven't seen whites this mad since o.j. screaming white people on both

since o.j. screaming white people on both sides, aahhh!

screaming white people on both sides, aahhh! i'm not saying i'm enjoying it,

sides, aahhh! i'm not saying i'm enjoying it, i'm just saying i've never seen

i'm not saying i'm enjoying it, i'm just saying i've never seen this before.

i'm just saying i've never seen this before. i watched a white riot in

this before. i watched a white riot in portland, oregon, on television

i watched a white riot in portland, oregon, on television the other night.

portland, oregon, on television the other night.

the other night. news said they did a million

news said they did a million dollars' worth of damage.

news said they did a million dollars' worth of damage. every black person watching was

dollars' worth of damage. every black person watching was like, amateurs.

every black person watching was like, amateurs. i'm staying out of it.

like, amateurs. i'm staying out of it. it's going to be like kaepernick

i'm staying out of it. it's going to be like kaepernick and let the whites figure this

it's going to be like kaepernick and let the whites figure this out amongst themselves.

and let the whites figure this out amongst themselves. know what i mean?

out amongst themselves. know what i mean? we've been here before, we've

know what i mean? we've been here before, we've been here before.

we've been here before, we've been here before. how many of you think it's the

been here before. how many of you think it's the most important thing we're

how many of you think it's the most important thing we're dealing with?

most important thing we're dealing with? don't forget.

dealing with? don't forget. don't forget all the things that

don't forget. don't forget all the things that are going on.

don't forget all the things that are going on. shootings.

are going on. shootings. what do you think about that?

shootings. what do you think about that? all these shootings the last

what do you think about that? all these shootings the last year.

all these shootings the last year. the worst mass shootings in the

year. the worst mass shootings in the history of the united states.

the worst mass shootings in the history of the united states. pulse nightclub which she said

history of the united states. pulse nightclub which she said isis did.

pulse nightclub which she said isis did. turned out that wasn't exactly

isis did. turned out that wasn't exactly what happened.

turned out that wasn't exactly what happened. that is what happened, then isis

what happened. that is what happened, then isis is scarier than i thought,

that is what happened, then isis is scarier than i thought, because they have very deep

is scarier than i thought, because they have very deep cover operatives.

because they have very deep cover operatives. going out deep for this on i

cover operatives. going out deep for this on i might have to get a grinder

going out deep for this on i might have to get a grinder account.

might have to get a grinder account.

account. bump a few guys off to throw

bump a few guys off to throw them off the trail.

bump a few guys off to throw them off the trail. what happened was he ledged

them off the trail. what happened was he ledged allegiance to isis before he did

what happened was he ledged allegiance to isis before he did what he did.

allegiance to isis before he did what he did. which is not the same as bng

what he did. which is not the same as bng in isis, you know what i mean?

which is not the same as bng in isis, you know what i mean? like i was going to have sex

in isis, you know what i mean? like i was going to have sex with a girl, right before i did

like i was going to have sex with a girl, right before i did i screamed out wutang.

with a girl, right before i did i screamed out wutang. that doesn't mean i'm in the

i screamed out wutang. that doesn't mean i'm in the wu-tang clan.

that doesn't mean i'm in the wu-tang clan. that just means i'm shouting

wu-tang clan. that just means i'm shouting wutang out.

that just means i'm shouting wutang out. more shootings than i can

wutang out. more shootings than i can literally count.

more shootings than i can literally count. you can't even go to the goddamn

literally count. you can't even go to the goddamn zoo without seeing shooting out

you can't even go to the goddamn zoo without seeing shooting out there.

zoo without seeing shooting out there. they shot a gorilla at my local

there. they shot a gorilla at my local zoo.

they shot a gorilla at my local zoo. the cincinnati police said

zoo. the cincinnati police said shooting that gorilla was the

the cincinnati police said shooting that gorilla was the toughest decision its department

shooting that gorilla was the toughest decision its department ever had to ma.

toughest decision its department ever had to ma. i said, you're about to see a

ever had to ma. i said, you're about to see a lot of n -- in gorilla costumes

i said, you're about to see a lot of n -- in gorilla costumes then.

lot of n -- in gorilla costumes then.

then.

why do we have to say that?

why do we have to say that? why do we have to say that black

why do we have to say that? why do we have to say that black lives matter?

why do we have to say that black lives matter? now i admit that is not the best

lives matter? now i admit that is not the best slogan.

now i admit that is not the best slogan. but mcdonald's already took, you

slogan. but mcdonald's already took, you deserve a break today.

but mcdonald's already took, you deserve a break today.

deserve a break today. and i guess it's kind of catchy

and i guess it's kind of catchy because everyone else is biting

and i guess it's kind of catchy because everyone else is biting it.

because everyone else is biting it. even the police bite it.

it. even the police bite it. blue lives matter.