The Durrells

r Get your hat and get your coat, babe 4‘

J‘ Leave your worries on the doorstep J‘

J‘ Just direct your feet J‘

J‘ On the sunny side of the street J‘

J‘ Don't you hear that pitter-pat J‘

J‘ And that happy tune at your doorstep? J‘

J‘ Life can be so sweet J‘

J‘ On the sunny side of the street... J‘

Hello... Bournemouth 2353.

Yes, Gerald Durrell is my son.

Gerry?

Mrs. Durrell!

You have just caned my son!

In a just society,

you would be tied to a tree and whipped

for beating an innocent child!

He would rather feed the rats behind the cricket pavilion

than attend his classes.

Yes, because he's been bullied

ever since arriving at this pitiful school!

And why do you think that is, dear?

Because“.

...he's a bit different.

That's why children are bullied, you moron.

It's easy to see where his incivility comes from.

Don't use that language!

Don't instruct me.

lam not one of your witless flunkies.

No offense.

I'm sure you would be lovely if you were allowed to be.

The purpose of education

is to draw the best out of children,

not to beat fear into them.

Afather would no doubt

have ironed out more of their shortcomings.

I look forward to a letter of apology.

Oh, he won't be returning.

I'd rather he were taught by monkeys.

Mom, I'd love that.

Can we do that?

Don't be daft, Gerry.

Ow!

What do you mean I'm a bit different?

How could you have stood by

and let me become an estate agent?

I am a writer.

You don't actually write, though, do you, darling?

Yes, I'm a fashion model.

Fighter pilot.

Oh, by the way, I've left school.

No, you haven't.

Look, if Gerry can do it, so can I.

Anyway, I've taken my uniform into the garden

and shot it, so...

I might as well leave too.

I'm as thick as two short planks.

As soon as I can find a husband, I'll be off.

What is the matter with all of you?

Roger.

Here he is, the unteachable leading the untrainable.

We should go to Corfu.

I've been.

Corfu Castle.

I'm not going back till they put a roof on it.

It's Corfe Castle, darling.

Jesus, Margo!

No, Corfu's a Greek island.

I told you I was dim!

Darling, you are not dim!

You're 16!

What's all this about a husband?

My friend Donald lives in Corfu.

He says it's dirt cheap, so I can write there,

full of disgusting animals for Gerry,

and Leslie, you can shoot them.

Hey, Margo!

I'll pack.

We are not going anywhere!

We can't just run away from our problems.

Good afternoon, Mrs. Durrell.

Oh!

Louisa, please.

Indeed.

We widowed folk must stick together.

You should come

and have that sherry.

Yes, I should.

Since I've retired,

I've played a lot of bowls.

Do you play?

If only I had the time.

And the bowls.

Let me speak plainly.

You are an attractive lady and I am an attractive man.

The children need a father figure,

and I'm a big admirer of boarding schools.

Come on!

Oh.

Hello.

Why are you so miserable?

Perhaps it's because I thought I was a good mother,

and yet all I've managed to do is bring up

one unteachable son, one psychopath,

one vacuous daughter, and you.

What's wrong with me?

And worse than that,

none of you seems happy.

There's no laughter in this house anymore.

A writer shouldn't be happy.

It's counter-productive.

You're not a writer, darling.

You sell houses.

It's a flag of convenience.

What about you?

You drink like a fish,

if fish drank gin.

And I know we've got money problems.

There are no secrets in this family.

There are secrets, actually.

Oh god, you're not dying, are you?

No, I'm not dying.

The secret is...

...that I can't live like this anymore.

When you were all small,

it was like we were on a journey,

always moving forward.

And now we've stopped moving forward,

and we are sinking.

So for once in my life, Larry, I have decided...

...to take your advice.

Which advice?

You know, a taxi would probably cost

the same as a banana in Bournemouth.

We should start as we mean to go on.

Wanting to kill each other?

Economizing.

Look, I can see the village up ahead!

Look!

You are not serious.

Now look, the house sale barely covered our debts.

We have no money.

I have a miserly widow's pension.

You are a miserly widow.

Be quiet!

And you all earn precisely nothing.

We are not on holiday.

We are here to live

like local people, in joy and togetherness,

without the trappings of so-called civilization,

which as far as I can tell

basically means cruelty and alienation.

It's going to be wonderful.

Don't talk to him.

Everybody here only speaks Greek, anyway.

Hi! You peoples want a taxi?

No.

Yes, absolutely.

Where are you going?

We like walking.

Ignore her.

We're going to that guesthouse

in the far, far distance.

That's a nice motor.

It's American.

Nothing like it on Corfu.

Spiros Halikiopoulos.

Leslie.

Margo.

Larry.

I'm... Mrs. Durrell.

The mother.

The most important person.

I'll get your luggage.

Where's Gerry?

Gerry?

There's a lizard!

It's a tree with a lizard on it.

How could that possibly be interesting?

Gerry!

You's very pale.

Yes, we plan to do a lot of sunbathing.

No, we don't.

It's the main reason we came here.

No, it isn't.

How long are you staying?

Uh, we don't know, but...

Well, we don't have a house to go back to in England.

Honest to god, if I wasn't Greek,

I'd like t0 be English.

Oh! Thank you.

Oh, this must be it.

No, you don't stay here.

Too expensive.

Lots of empty houses on the island.

I'll find you one.

Yes. Good.

Mrs. Durrells, come!

Gerry!

There's a zoo in the lavatory!

Wow!