Twisted Metal

Remember, baby,

this is our first time at the Council.

Those fuckers are gonna try to railroad us

into taking a shit deal. Gotta be tough.

I am tough!

This is Kreel, the scavenger I told you about,

from Rancho Cucamonga!

Wow.

That's my seat.

Why don't you go, uh, fuck off with your lipstick,

'cause the men need to talk shop.

Sorry, Boxer.

Still breakin' her in.

Well, don't just lurk in the shadows.

Come here.

You're with the new one, right?

Yeah, for now.

- I'm Krista, by the way. - Hey!

Can I have a swig of that? Thanks.

All right, let's get down to business.

Laur, you owe me a make-good from last month's trade.

What the fuck? Half those shells were duds.

Yeah, that's my fault.

Derek spilled an entire can of Surge on them.

I'll just stop with the bullets and throw in some extra medical.

Anyone have any wide tampons?

Me.

But I want the batteries

you've been holding onto for a rainy day.

I'm gonna need the tampons first.

Whoa, hold up.

I thought the guys out there were making the deals.

Oh!

We're the ones who make the real trades back here, babe.

Outside is just the monthly dick-measuring contest.

So, we go to open the door, right?

And I'm expecting to see a dead body,

'cause, the smell.

And you wouldn't guess what it was.

Aw, come on!

That was, like, the most awesome fart, Jess!

And this sucks so much.

Oh my god!

Okay, so I totally don't wanna kill you girls,

but Boxer said, um, that I have to.

It's a whole power play thing so he can control the supplies.

But just to be clear, I so do not wanna do this.

Oh, fuck.

Fuck, I don't want to.

But what if you didn't have to?

We put up with their bullshit for protection, right?

But...

...look at us!

We're in the driver's seat.

Pedro said we can't drive.

Well fuck Pedro.

He loves to fuck so much.

We make the deals.

We deserve so much more than just a seat at the table.

We deserve the whole goddamn room.

Or, do y'all just wanna be the bitches

banished to the ladies' room forever?

All right. It's time to measure our dicks.

Hiya!

So the ladies and I have been talking,

and we've all decided that we're dumping you.

Now, this is an amicable split, so...

we'll leave you children the baby food

and take the rest.

Those are our terms. Take it or leave it.

You ungrateful sluts can leave us,

but you try and take our supplies

and we'll fucking kill you--

Anyone else have shit to say?

I think you're a bitch.

You're nothing without me.

I was your ride or die!

Well, the ride's over, so...

Oh...

God.

Oh...

Uh--hey.

Hey!

Hi.

What the hell are you doin' here?

Don't worry about your pants.

I had to search you for weapons.

Only found one, small caliber.

So you escaped New San Francisco?

Hmm, impressive.

Or rather, it would be if you weren't a spy.

Spy? I'm not a spy.

Oh, playing dumb? Classic spy move.

You either start talking,

or mama's going to start tweaking

those pesky little pepperonis.

What the fuck, Ashley?

You were supposed to come and get us when he woke up.

You meant, like, right away?

Ugh! Fine.

You used to be cool.

Oh. Quiet.

I'm so happy to see you.

Oh, I have so much to tell you.

New San Fran, it was a trap.

Raven tried to get me to play video games all day

so I could enter the tournament and win her her wish,

to help her creepy coma friend.

Um...

I'm happy to see you.

It's good to see you, too.

And I'm not the only one excited to see you.

Lionel, it's me.

Krista.

You must be confused. My name's John.

Right, your memory.

Sorry.

God, you look exactly the same.

Minus the braces.

How do you know I had braces?

I know because I'm your sister.

Huh.

Wow. Okay.

Uh, it's, uh...

Well, it's, uh,

nice to meet you, again.

Yeah.

Okay.

Um.

Sorry.

Okay, okay.

So...

what's up with the masks?

- We call ourselves the Dolls. - Let's go.

The divide between insiders

and outsiders grows by the day.

So we fight to make things even Steven.

We're making real change.

Our numbers grow with every community that we free.

What started off with just four women

became all this.

This should be your size.

You know all that from a weird hug?

Wasn't that weird.

Hey, baby, would you help me out of this?

My tits can't breathe.

Maybe later.

Here, try this on.

It'll go good with the pants.

So, catch me up on the last 20 years.

I want to know everything.

Well, you know, a little bit of this,

a little bit of that.

Milkmanning.

Had a cool car.

Met Quiet.

Here we are.

Uh, the scouts are back.

You want to be briefed now or...

Now's fine.

Seriously, John?

Your sister hasn't seen you in 20 years.

And the best you can come up with is milkmanning?

I thought I would feel some way,

shit, remember something, but I don't.

I look at my own sister and...

she's a complete stranger to me.

Just don't shut yourself off.

Just because you don't feel it now

doesn't mean you never will.

Sure.

Come on.

I got someone you'll definitely remember.

Oh.

Oh, you're a sight for sore eyes.

He looks beautiful.

So since I've been gone,

it looks like you've made some changes...

...to the car.

I would call them upgrades, but, yeah.

Upgrades, right.

So has, uh, Roadkill had any new passengers since me?

A few.

Not that that's any of your business!

No, no. it's not. Your car, your call.

So what's a few, like, two? 12?

- John. - Okay, okay,

So you're not going to believe this,

but I found a place that we can go away to.

My grandfather, he had a family cabin.

It's remote as hell.

It's up in the Sierras, right? It's a lot of fishin' holes.

We can catch our own dinner.

Nobody'll find us. We'll be safe.

We could live together, just you and me.

I mean, if your posse

wants to come, they can sleep on the couch.

That's cool.

That cabin sounds great, John.

- Yeah? - It does.