21

"Winner, winner, chicken dinner."

Those words had been dancing around my head all night.

I mean, it's Vegas lore, that phrase.

Just ask any of the old-time pit bosses, they'll know.

It was a Chinese dealer at Binion's who was first credited with the line.

He would shout it every time he dealt Blackjack.

That was over forty years ago, and the words still catch.

Winner, winner, chicken dinner. There it is!

"Winner, winner, chicken dinner."

Yeah, try it.

I had heard it at least fourteen times that night.

I couldn't lose.

First of all, what I was doing wasn't illegal.

There were certain institutions and people that frowned upon it,

but it's legal.

And not everyone can do it.

Just those with gifted minds.

I have a gifted mind.

That's what got me into all this mess.

I was counting cards and I was up over $640,000.

All right! I'm just gonna have to split those tens.

- Splitting tens. - Splitting tens again.

Well, that's all right. I've been winning and losing for years.

We used hand signals, too.

Folded arms, the table's hot.

A touch to the eye, we need to talk.

And a hand running through perfect flowing hair meant only one thing.

Get out. Now.

"Winner, winner, chicken dinner."

Stroke. Stroke. Stroke. Stroke.

PreMed.

4.0 GPA.

44 MCATS.

President, American Legion math league.

TA to professors Wilkins and Sanders.

Both of whom are friends of mine, and who wrote glowing recommendations.

And you're accepted early into school here at Harvard Med,

pending graduation from MIT. It's very impressive.

Thank you.

The Robinson Scholarship is comprehensive, as you know.

It's a free ride. And free rides don't come easy.

Absolutely.

We have seventy-six applicants this year, only one of whom will get the scholarship

and most of whom have résumés just as impressive as yours.

Right.

Professor Phillips?

Some kids grow up wanting to play for the Red Sox.

You know, some grow up wanting to be, I don't know, a fireman.

I grew up... well, really, I just wanted to come here to Harvard Med.

And now that I've gotten accepted, it seems to only come down to the money.

Which I don't really have.

So, what I'm trying to say

is that I really, really need this scholarship.

Did you rehearse that?

Yeah. Like, fourteen times in front of the mirror.

Unfortunately, desire doesn't figure into this much.

The Robinson is going to go to someone who...

dazzles.

Somebody who just jumps off the page.

Oh, well, then, I'm also involved in a science competition.

We're building a robotic wheel

that can navigate itself using a proprietary GPS system.

Well, I'm designing the system. So...

Right.

Ben, last year, the Robinson went to Hyum Jae Wook,

a Korean immigrant who has only one leg.

Well, I have both my legs.

Well, have you considered cutting one of them off?

That was a joke.

Ben, it's all about the essay.

You need to really explain to us what makes you special.

What life experience separates you from all the rest.

Life experience.

What can you tell me, Ben,

that's going to dazzle me?

I'm so sorry I'm late.

- Where is your jacket? - Oh, I got it. I got it. It's right here.

This is no way for the new assistant manager to come to work.

Congratulations. How does $8 an hour sound?

Eight dollars?

Wow! Wow. That's great, Warren. Thank you. Thank you.

You slept with him, didn't you?

- Yes, I did. Yes, I did. - Yes, you did.

I'll sleep with him, too, and I'll get $8 an hour.

So Palmer finishes up his lecture, right? And I say to him,

"well, professor Palmer, you're gonna need at least fourteen capacitance probes

"to get the kind of results that you're looking for," okay?

So then he says to me, "Miles, don't you think that's a little excessive?"

And I get up, I swear to God, Ben, I get up in front of the entire class and I say,

"you can never have enough capacitance probes."

Oh, my God. What the hell is wrong with you?

Oh, nothing.

I hope nothing. You just got promoted, man. You should be happy.

I just gotta write this essay for the Robinson Scholarship, and I have nothing.

And the reason that I have nothing is 'cause, well, I've done nothing.

- Oh, give me a break, Ben. - What?

You have everything.

You blow me out of the water, and I'm a cerebral stud. Is that nothing?

Yeah, well, it doesn't dazzle.

Hey. It dazzles me, mister.

You know, ever since I was sixteen, I crushed exams.

I took on extracurriculars. I showed up early.

I even sat up at the front and I stayed late.

Man, I gave up everything.

You know, I gave up fun. I gave up sex.

I don't think you gave up sex.

- Okay. Maybe not sex. - Yeah, you didn't give up sex.

All right, all right. Not sex, but...

It just annoys me that the one thing

that is stopping me from going to Harvard Med is money.

You know, tuition fees and living expenses alone cost over $300,000.

$300,000.

It's outrageous. It's astronomically high. I get that.

You know, I just thought there was more to life than just money.

Well, look at the bright side,

I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance.

Thank you.

- Happy birthday, honey. - Thanks, Mom.

Thank you, love. Kisses.

Make a wish.

- Make a wish. - Okay.

Bravo.

Congratulations, Benjamin.

Did you know Miles did the frosting on that? You see that?

It took me five minutes to figure out it was a fibonacci series...

Where the next number is twenty-one. Now you're slipping, Cam.

Cam, you owe another six bucks.

No, no. I didn't eat any of the buffalo wings.

Oh, really? That's great. Well, we're not doing it that way.

We're just dividing equally. So let's say you pay.

- I got it, all right? - No, no.

I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it.

It's your birthday. You're as broke-ass as I am.

I just wish now I had eaten some of those wings.

So, I nailed the specs on the 2.09 last night,

after nineteen cups of coffee.

- Check it out. - You are kidding.

- What is this? - You're kidding!

This is good. Miles, this is good.

Yeah, well, it better be 'cause this is what we've been working for since we got here.

This is called destiny.

You know, there is the... thank you.

There is the possibility that we might not actually win this thing.

Oh, yeah? Bite your tongue! Bite your damn tongue!

Look, guys,

we don't date, we don't travel, we don't have any money.

The only thing that we do have is the 2.09 competition.

If we can't even win that, what's the point?

Hey, hey. Look at this!

No, no, no, no.

Yeah. We suck.

Your father would be so proud of you, Ben.

Yeah.

Do you remember anything about him?

Not really. Maybe when he shaved?

Yeah, I think I watched him shave.

So, what are your plans for the rest of the night?

I don't know. I'll probably just go back and work on that essay.

Ben, you're working too hard.

Between the job and school and the 2.09, you've had no time for just yourself.

You have to squeeze in a little time for fun, Ben.

You only turn twenty-one once. And it goes by very fast.

Okay. All right.

- Good night. - All right, good night.

- Don't come home before 3:00. - All right.

All right.

Now, who can explain Newton's method and how you use it?

You can use it to solve nonlinear equations.

That's impressive. That's really good. I mean, I'm very impressed by that,

especially since my class is called nonlinear equations.

All right, now somebody tell me something I don't already know.

Anyone?

Bueller. Anyone? Bueller.

Newton stole it.

- I'm sorry? - Newton stole it.

Joseph Raphson published this same method fifty years earlier.

And if the start value is too far removed from true zero, then it fails.

- I'm sorry, what's your name? - Ben. Ben Campbell.

Ben.

So Ben Campbell suggests that Joseph Raphson

was the original author of this method.

Well, if that's the case, then why didn't he get any credit?

Well, for one thing, Newton had a better publicist.

And for another, after 1700, we know very little about Raphson

other than the fact that he discovered the Kabbalah about 300 years before Madonna.

All right, now, let's give Ben a chance for some extra credit, shall we?

We're gonna call this the game show host problem, all right?

Ben, suppose you're on a game show.

And you are given a chance to choose from three different doors, all right?

Now, behind one of the doors is a new car. Behind the other two, goats.

Which door would you choose, Ben?

Door number one?

Door number one. Ben chooses door number one.

All right, now, the game show host,

who, by the way, knows what's behind all the other doors,

decides to open another door. Let's say he chooses door number three.

Behind which sits a goat. Now...

Ben, game show host comes up to you.

He says, "Ben, do you want to stay with door number one

"or go with door number two?"