Affairs of State

Thank you! Thank you!

Thank you. Thank you very much!

Thank you very...

Thank you, so incredibly grateful to be here.

Thank you very much.

Baines! Baines! Baines!

God bless America!

Baines! Baines! Baines!

Thank you very, very much!

History has proven that a great leader can change the world.

For better or for worse.

Once upon a time, in the not-too-distant future,

America was at war with itself.

Our political parties had fallen into crisis.

An identity crisis.

And where there is war,

there are soldiers.

And where there are soldiers,

there are casualties.

Mary Maple was once the Magnolia Queen.

Yes, it's me.

Thirty years and 30 pounds ago.

- Michael. - Yes.

Tell me about yourself, what's your background?

Where'd you go to school?

I graduated from GW.

Hmm. What did you major in?

Political Science with a minor in Journalism.

What kind of grades?

Graduated with honors.

Cum laude.

Cum laude.

My goodness.

- Sugar? - Oh, yes please.

Mary Maple.

A very good person to know in Washington.

So, how can I help you, Michael?

Well, it's pretty clear that Senator Baines

is gonna run for president.

If I can be anywhere near that, I mean...

I could learn a lot from the man.

Well, John is a good friend.

- Nothing is set in stone, of course. - No, no, of course.

Rob Reynolds is unofficially running the campaign.

I have heard of him, although I haven't made his acquaintance.

Rob is also a good friend.

He's the best at what he does.

Yes, he is.

Consider yourself invited to the Maple Foundation event,

where my good friend John Boland Baines is our guest speaker.

I'll even introduce you to Rob Reynolds myself.

I'd very much appreciate that, Mrs. Maple.

Call me Mary.

Oh! My goodness!

Oh! My goodness!

Oh! My! Oh, darlin'! Michael!

Darlin', I need you... I need you...

I need you to stop for a minute.

Oh. Oh. Oh.

- Hey. - What?

Where'd you go? I'm in here.

You know, I like you better without it.

You mean you don't like my wig?

No, no, no. I like your wig.

I mean, here.

Now.

I like you like this.

You do?

Oh, sugar, you really are something.

Oh! Oh!

A little over a year ago, at a lunch counter,

my boss, Senator Lester Garret,

told me he had a pain in his abdomen.

Less than two months later, Lester died of pancreatic cancer.

I'd been out of work ever since.

I had to make something happen.

I was on borrowed time in a borrowed SUV.

That Judge Karl?

How did you get this?

Callie, Judge Karl has a wife and kids.

Precisely.

And he's been a judicial activist

against same-sex marriage for his entire career.

Some of his legal language was actually in DOMA, for Christ's sakes.

I mean, he's a hypocrite of the highest order.

Callie and I met when we were both interning for Lester.

Yeah, but, Callie...

wife and kids.

Yeah, you're right, I can't do that to the wife and kids.

She's my roommate and my best friend. But lately...

I'll blackmail him.

How much do you think we would get?

Not much, honestly.

She had quite a collection going.

Most of those guys weren't exactly big players, though.

The judge tape...

This was different.

You know, in this little box...

is the real DC.

Yeah, and it's going to stay in that box.

For a rainy day.

Speaking of rainy days...

umm, how we doing on rent?

'Cause, uh, that's a final notice.

Yeah, we're probably going to have to bust out the umbrellas.

Really?

That was a gift from Tanya.

Oh, how nice of her.

Did you ever consider selling the coke?

Michael, I can't sell a gift.

We have to pay rent.

I know.

Whatever are we to do?

This is my friend Kevin Bidwell,

noted political journalist for a noted political newspaper

whose circulation was way down.

Who you fuckin'?

Kevin Bidwell,

former college roommate who lived vicariously through me.

I wanna work for John Baines.

I want a rim job from Ann Coulter,

but that doesn't mean it's gonna happen.

It was like college had never ended for Kevin.

All right, so what is it you actually want, Michael?

I mean, let's say you...

you get the job, and Baines became president?

Where do you see yourself? Humor me.

I see myself running for Congress.

And I see myself winning.

I'm officially humored.

You think I'm kidding.

Congress... I-- Are you even a resident of any state?

Where's the Podunk town you come from?

It's not about where I'm from, it's where I'm going.

That should be your campaign slogan.

Rob Reynolds will never take you seriously.

What if I told you...

that Rob Reynolds is going to have to take me seriously.

If it were me...

I'd go to Reynolds like I'm doing him a favor.

Give him what I have, protect my sources...

Does Callie have anything to do with this?

All right, two things,

and I want you to listen to me, very carefully.

Do not let Reynolds know

that you want to run for Congress,

or anything else, for that matter.

- And? - And...

just be careful.

These aren't Boy Scouts you're dealing with.

The Maple Foundation fundraiser.

An annual event to raise money for Mary's various causes.

In this case, the cause was the United Party.

Excuse me, sir.

Rob Reynolds.

A wunderkind who had gotten his first congressman elected

before his 25th birthday.

His tactics: questioned.

His resolve: feared.

Rob Reynolds had started a new party

and Senator Baines was gonna be the face of it.

This is not about this year, it's not about this election,

- it's about the next elec... - Rob, darlin'.

Excuse me, gentlemen.

I wonder if you've met Michael Lawson.

Michael is... Well, Michael...

Uh, Michael would do anything to get onboard.

Oh, yeah, well, good luck, Michael.

Uh, Mary.

Don't worry, darlin', I'll work on him.

Well, Kevin had been right about one thing,

Reynolds was never going to take me seriously.

I had known that.

But Mary had kept her promise and gotten me the introduction.

The rest was up to me.

Lydia Bowman. New Year's Eve a couple years ago.

Senator Barr's party, you were Rob Reynolds's assistant.

Executive assistant. Of course, of course.

Michael.

Lawson, yeah, I know.

Lydia, I was wondering if maybe you...

- Oh, Michael, I'm here with someone. - I know.

I was wondering if maybe you'd give this to Mr. Reynolds for me.

Oh, I... I thought...

- Now I'm embarrassed. - No, don't be.

I knew you were here with someone.

My great misfortune.

I'll give this to Rob. Thank you.

Ladies and gentlemen,

my dear friends,

I would like to welcome you to this party.

And when I say this party, I am not just talking about this event,

I am talking about a movement.

Yes!

Unlike that broken Grand Old Party...

...this party is United.

Yeah!

Without further ado,

I'm going to give you the man who's here to get this party started.

From the great state of Texas, Senator John Boland Baines!