grown-ish

Junior: When it comes to dating, it used to be that all a guy

could hope for was a light peck on the first date.

But if there's one thing I've learned in my time at Cal U,

it's that hookup culture is real.

Let's just say that the time until tip-off

is significantly shorter.

Less talking. Let's get these pants off.

Uh...

And I ain't mad at that.

Well, this has certainly been a lovely evening.

If you want, I can come up if you want to get down.

Um, I don't think I'm up for it tonight.

Oh, okay. That's cool.

We did have burritos.

All that sour cream.

No, it's not that.

I'm just having a... a herpes flare-up.

- Herpes? - Mm-hmm.

Like, um... Like "herpes" herpes?

Yeah.

You're not gonna freak out about this, are you?

Yes!

No! No, no, no, no, no, no.

Wow. Uh, I just feel like I would remember,

you know, you telling me last week

that you had herpes when we had sex.

Well, that's because when we hooked up,

I didn't have an outbreak and we used protection,

so the chances of you getting it were relatively small.

Relatively?

Girl, what are you, S-Sir Isaac Newton?

Why didn't you tell me?

Because I shouldn't have to.

I'm the one living with it, and we were safe.

Plus herpes, herpes, herpes.

Herpes, herpes, herpes, herpes, herpes, herpes,

- herpes, herpes, herpes, herpes, herpes. -

Guys, I just got the worst news a guy can get.

Oh, you found out Batman isn't real?

Oh, your mom is mad at you!

Uh, no.

No, no.

Candice may have possibly exposed me to an STI.

That's hilarious.

I mean I'm so sorry to hear that.

- Are you okay? - I don't know.

My junk could possibly be a World Health Organization

hot zone for all I know.

Come on, man, it's not that big of a deal.

Just go get you a Z-Pak.

You know, you get the clap, gotta clap back.

Yeah, dude, just go to the health center,

ask for Nurse Tessa.

She is the second most popular girl at this school.

Yeah, uh, you know what's funny about that.

I don't know if, uh...

I don't know if the Z-Pak is gonna cover it.

She may have exposed me to herpes.

- Oh! - God is good.

Junior: Wait a second. Wait a second.

You guys just said it wasn't a big deal.

Zeke: I-I mean, it wasn't, when it was, you know,

your garden-variety chlamydias and gonorrheas,

but this is not the move.

This is so unfair.

I do everything right.

I'm responsible.

I wear condoms.

I think we are beyond whispering,

my little S-T-Diva.

Sure, they prevent some STIs, but they're not foolproof.

You know what is foolproof?

Please don't say Jesus.

The only way to not get an STD is to not S the D.

We knew what was coming.

That's my youth pastor always said.

You basically said Jesus.

Being responsible goes both ways, Junior.

You're awfully judgey for someone

who didn't even know his own status.

Okay, so it's cool that this girl is out here

tossing around herpes like free T-shirts at a Clippers game?

That's what I'm saying.

- Hey. - Right.

When you go for a ride on Splash Mountain,

sometimes you get wet.

- Sploosh. - Uh...

Honestly, all this just makes me happy that

Black people can't get cold sores.

No one take medical advice from him.

Aaron W. Jackson.

You're a hard man to track down.

Oh, shit, are you... are you from the FBI?

Okay, listen, I swear to you that the tweet

I posted about punching Clarence Thomas in the throat,

- it was... it was a joke. Purely. - Uh-huh.

Symone Andrews.

I run our panels for Diversity and Inclusion at Metaverse,

and your speech at headquarters last month

really sent shock waves through the company.

Mm. Thank you.

So you came all the way from Seattle to give me a compliment?

No, no, no. Um, I'm here because

I'd like to put you on another panel,

but you stopped responding to everyone's e-mails.

I mean, I'm starting to take this personally.

Yeah, I'm sorry. I'm just not... not interested.

Okay. Why?

Well, because the company that you work for builds profits

off the backs of working-class people

while also donating to political candidates

who essentially are destroying this country.

Okay, okay. Well, um, the school you work for

literally built its profits off the backs of inmates

at San Quentin, so...

Right. Well, that's why...

I mean, I organized the orange jumpsuit demonstration.

Yeah, but you still took the job here.

Because just like me, you realize that the best way

to effect change is from the inside.

So, how about this?

Meet me here tomorrow,

and if what I have to show you doesn't change your mind,

then I promise I'll stop stalking you.

Yeah.

Hmm.

Annika: Junior. Who needs men anyway?

I got this.

Let's do this.

Is your... temperature rising?

No, that's not right.

You look like you need to be hosed down.

Nope, really dry over here.

I'm just an emotionally available guy who goes to therapy.

Ugh! What's wrong with me?

After a good night's sleep and a deep dive on WebMD,

I was pretty sure I didn't have herpes.

But possibly a tilted uterus?

Oh, no!

Oh, my God! Was that there before?

That wasn't there before.

Oh!

I think I need a second opinion.

Doug: Hmm.

It was either this or calling my mom,

and I might've made the wrong choice.

Huh. Interesting.

If you think about it, Aaron's probably gonna be

my brother-in-law one day,

and Doug, he was just here.

It just looks like a mild razor burn to me.

What do you think?

Unless you're chafing. Are you a chafer?

Come on, guys, I need to know.

Okay?

I have never played this game before.

Like Frisbee golf.

Wait. Why are you even coming to us for this?

Great question. Your mom is a doctor.

Why isn't she doing this?

I just got a little nervous.

I haven't gotten my test results back yet.

- Hmm. - Wait, you already got tested?

I just thought you didn't have insurance.

- What are bros for? - Literally anything else but this.

- Not that. -

Uh, Candice is checking in to see if I'm free tonight.

Don't even answer that. Don't do it.

Okay, okay, a little harsh, but I think he's right.

I think ghosting is an appropriate move

- in this particular situation. - Guys, are you kidding me?

What other girl is gonna be down if I do have it?

- Hmm. - We're basically together.

It's like Candice locked me down with a kid,

except my herpes aren't gonna grow up to become president.

I wouldn't sweat it.

Bro, I mean, yes, you're benched right now,

but once you're cleared for play,

you're gonna be back... wa-ow! ...

sinking threes.

Swish.

Thanks.

Yeah.

- -

Well...

it's a little awkward now.

- Yeah. - Um...

I guess I should leave before it gets worse.

- Yeah. I didn't want to say it. - Yeah, okay.

Well, gentlemen, I, uh... I bid you adieu.

I made it worse, didn't I?