American Dad!

Aah!

American Dad 5x17 An Incident at Owl Creek Original Air Date on May 9, 2010

Hey, Shari and Buckle are moving into the neighborhood,

and they've invited us to a pool party.

Wait, next weekend.

Does that give us enough time?

Oh, no, Stan! Does this mean

we have to do another one of your...

"Are we good enough to be seen in public" Smith family fashion shows?

Yes, it does.

First up,

Hayley Smith in what appears to be

the "White Trash Going Crazy at Lake Havasu" collection.

Stop! Stop!

You are not wearing that to Buckle and Shari's pool party.

You look like you should be holding up round cards

at a dog fight in Fresno!

Steve, you've known about this party for a week,

and you haven't bulked up!

You didn't make a dent in that Russian protein powder I gave you.

Uh, I don't think it's for people, Dad.

Get out of my sight.

You made me feel like a fool for building

a professional-grade runway in my living room.

You, my darling, look perfect.

Thank you.

But you run your mouth at these things.

I'm giving you a hundred-word limit.

Here, I got you this counter. Are you serious?

You've got 97 left.

Stan, why is it every time we go out in public together,

you make us pass your silly inspection.

Yeah, Dad. Why do you care so much what other people think?

Because that's all that matters!

One's true value is determined

solely through the eyes of others.

That's from Genesis.

Their first album, I think.

Welcome neighborhood, Shari.

Glad not in woods anymore?

One year in that fershtunkinah cabin was enough.

I was going meshugie.

Buckle! Get rid of that owl!

My migraine!

But that owl was my best friend for 15 years

in the wilderness.

It's him or me. Who you gonna pick?

Who? Who?

Stay out of it!

Party's going well.

No Smith family blunders.

That's good.

Mmm, great brisket.

Careful, now.

96% of all party fouls involve food or drink.

Don't spill it, don't choke on it.

How are you?!

You're doing great, kiddo.

I love you so much.

Dad, I'm sweating like a pig in this thing.

It's humiliating. Not to me.

And show some respect--

your grandmother drowned in that bathing suit.

How family? No embarrassed?

So far, so good.

Hello, y'all!

I'm Stan Smith's brother, Appleby McFridays.

Do I smell kreplach?

Oh, no-- Roger!

I helped Buckle with his conversion to Judaism.

That was one stubborn foreskin.

Hey, Rabbi, I got a joke for you.

Two priests are hitting on an altar boy...

Uh, hello, guy who mistakenly believes he's my brother.

If-if you want to hear a joke, Rabbi,

I got a nice, clean one.

Um, uh, okay, what are the three rings of marriage?

The first one's the engagement ring,

the second one's the wedding ring,

and the third one...

the suffer-ring.

Stan, that's not a good joke,

'cause it's not racist.

Okay, here's one.

So, this lazy Mexican

walks into an even lazier black guy's bar...

Hey, uh, everyone, who wants to see me cannonball into the pool?

A mag turninhis body into an old instrument of war?

I'm in!

I am constantly doing damage control

for this family.

ALL Cannonball! Cannonball!

Cannonball!

Oh, dear, that brisket was too greasy.

Now I got to poop.

Cannonball! Cannonball!

Cannonball! Cannonball!

Cannonball!

Cannonball! Cannonball!

No...!

No way!

Oh, my God!

Great cannonball, bro.

He did that in the neighbor's pool?

That's disgusting!

People have to swim in that water.

I'm probably gonna get some kind of gross rash.

I was in the pool when he did it.

I was at ground zero.

Hayley, it's not okay to use that term.

I was actually at ground zero.

I was the first one on the scene selling erotic T-shirts:

"Osama bin Sexy,"

"Sexy bin Laden,"

and "Yo Mama Bin Fartin."

That last one was not erotic to everybody.

Your poor father.

He didn't even come home last night.

Stan!

Have you been in there all night?

Yes! And I'm never coming out!

And you were worried about me embarrassing you?

Stop it, Steve.

Stan, none of us think any less of you for what you did.

I don't care what any of you guys think.

What does that matter?

My reputation's ruined!

Soiled, like these cheap swim trunks

and the several places

I sat down when I first came home.

Sweetheart, nobody knows.

Just a few neighbors at the party.

You're blowing this whole thing out of proportion.

Okay, okay.

M-Maybe you're right.

Oh, no, oh, no, no, Frank, no, you can stay in there.

Hi, Frank.

Stan, what happened?

It was so embarrassing!

The whole town's laughing at me!

And on all days!

Bullock just appointed me

the head of the new Tactical Urban Response Division!

Francine. Francine, wake up.

I'm too tired.

Do whatever you want, just don't get it in my hair.

Wake the kids and get them in the car.

You have 90 seconds.

Stan, it's 3:00 in the morning.

Where are we going?

I can no longer live in this town.

The Smiths are dead.

There's no turning back.

Oh, my God!

It's Frank!

I see him, I see him.

Rest in peace, Frank.

You're living under God's sink now.

Stan we've been driving all night.

Do you even have a plan?

Yes. To get as far away

from my shame as possible.

Can't we just go home.

Yeah. If we can go back in time.

Can you do that, Hayley?

Have you smoked that much weed?

Well if you see me back there

tell me don't jump in the pool.

Don't jump in the pool!

Roger, what happened?

Well, I guess sometimes a hole in

men's room Stall

is a just a hole in a men's room stall.

The world needs to know

America is ready to step up

and lead again.

So inspiring.

Hey, you guys are truckers.

Wanna hear a horribly racist joke?

Hey! Where I come from

we don't judge a man

by the color of his skin,

or his religion,

or even the mistakes of his past.

Excuse me friend.

Where are you from exactly?

A small town in Indiana called Mercyville.

It's not fancy mind you.

You know we don't have

any swimming pools.

And uh, no one ever recounts

any swimming pool related stories.

But what we lack in places

to swim, we make up for in understanding.

That sounds like a perfect place

for us to live.

Well not much of a gay

scene out back either.

What a quaint town.

A malt shop, an old-fashioned barber,