The Brokenwood Mysteries

Hey! Good. Johnny.

Hey. Where's Frodo?

Busy with the Christmas rush.

- Ah! Okay. - Todd.

- Johnny. - So where are we going?

Brokenwood.

I have a date with destiny and some unfinished business.

Oh, and merry Christmas, detectives.

Favorite time of year, huh?

If you say so, Frodo.

Hey, who doesn't like Christmas?

Christmas is going to be awesome this year.

- Plans? - A family get together.

My half uncle Les is coming.

He's legendary.

Legendary for?

Well, it's more like a myth, actually,

because I've never met him.

But, I mean, all I know is he's a gardener and a poet.

A poet, no less.

And Johnny gets out of prison today,

having totally mended his ways,

which bodes well for a great family Christmas,

don't you think?

Family. It is indeed what it's all about.

Yeah sometimes Christmas can be stink.

But I've got a good feeling about this year.

- Thanks, Frodo. - Thanks, Frodo.

What are your plans for Christmas Day?

I thought you hate Christmas.

Honestly, I don't.

Even though nothing good ever comes of it.

I find I get together in the city.

Cousins put down a hangi.

Lots of tamariki, lots of laughter.

- Well, sounds... - Great.

Too good to be true.

I'm just telling it like it is.

You want to come?

Um. Oh, yeah. No, I'm busy actually.

Really?

Yes, really.

Oh, deceased out on Saddler's Line.

There you go.

Someone's Christmas just got ruined.

Yeah.

Hey, boss.

Hey, is that who I think it is?

Santa no less. Want to sit this one out?

I know how you feel about Father Christmas.

Huh. A lot of people believe in Santa.

I, however, can be more objective.

- Hit and run? - No obvious signs of injury.

In the middle of nowhere. No vehicle?

No signs of a sleigh. No.

No reindeer, for that matter, either.

Do we know who he is?

You mean who he really is? Not yet.

But, uh, guess who drives an ambulance these days?

- Is that...? - Rhys Oades.

The one and only.

Rhys.

- Long time no see. - Detective. Hello.

New line of work?

I did everything I could, I swear.

I'm not detecting any sinus.

And...

Clear.

Yeah, it's kind of just been a nightmare of a day.

But you're okay now?

I just feel bad for all the kids,

you know, like not getting presents this year.

I can't be the guy who let Santa die.

I don't know if I can carry that.

I'm sure you did everything you could.

Boxes are empty, nothing of interest.

Hey, Mike.

Excuse me.

Oh.

Yeah. That's awkward.

Uh, Rhys.

Does the name Les Oades mean anything to you?

Uh, no. I do have an uncle called Les.

Apart from that, no.

Uh, Rhys, this gentleman has

ID would suggest that his name is Les Oades.

- No way. - You didn't recognize him?

No, I... I thought that was Santa.

Uh, Rhys, what about now?

Uh, it's too hard to say.

When did you last see your uncle?

Uh, I would have been, like, 3 years old.

Yeah, apparently he used to bounce me up and down

on the trampoline,

and one time, he bounced me so hard I flew off,

hit my head into a power pole.

It was a concussion, probably. I don't remember.

Hey, Rhys, why don't we contact your dad?

- He might have a better idea. - Why?

Because he's your uncle's brother.

True.

Really, I thought that was Santa. Oh.

Rhys, do you want to maybe sit down for a little bit

and have a drink of water?

Hi, Les. Mike Shepard.

Let's get you somewhere more comfortable.

Out of the sun.

Hello, Mike.

A sad day for children all around the world.

Indeed.

Uh, once Gina is finished, let's get the road open.

Oh, what a waste.

Les. Les. Lessie.

- Long time, Bobby. - Oh, it's so hard, mate.

It's just so bloody hard.

You can confirm that this is your brother, Lester Oades?

As the day is long. Oh, my heart is broken.

What the hell happened?

Uh, he was found out on Saddlers Line

dressed in a Santa suit.

Oh, that'd be Les. He loved Christmas.

Oh, well, nothing to be done. Let's get him buried.

Mike.

Uh, there will need to be a post-mortem first.

For?

To ascertain the cause of death.

Well, he's dead, mate. Gone. That won't bring him back.

It's standard procedure in any unexplained death.

Yeah, well, the thing is, he was very clear that,

um, you know,

if, God forbid, he was to be struck down,

he wanted to be buried before sunset.

Before sunset?

As you know, I am but a humble gravedigger.

And given my profession, he confided in me.

And I said to him, "It would be my honor, Les."

So I intend to fulfill the pledge to my brother.

- He was a religious person? - Could say that.

But he practiced some kind of Orthodox Judaism or...?

Oh, practice, no. He didn't really need to.

He was very good. So...

So your brother was Jewish and yet loved Christmas?

Who said he was Jewish?

Judaism is the religion followed by Jewish people.

Not solely.

- So he wasn't Jewish? - He was a little bit.

- Oh, a little bit? - Yeah.

Yeah, he was Jewish, but mainly, um...

- Mainly? - He mainly, uh, haiku.

- Haiku? - As I recall it.

Haiku is a form of poetry.

Well, that's the thing.

He loved a good poem, Les.

And followers of haiku need to be buried before sunset?

Some of them. Les definitely did.

But, you know, I'm grieving here.

My brother is lying dead,

and you are splitting hairs over his religious afflictions.

I mean, do what you have to do, but please don't muck around.

I have to bury my... my brother.

Gina, this is where you get to work.

Yeah. I'll leave you to it.

Oh, Gina, did you leave the key out?

Of course.

Thanks.

One moment.

Kristin.

A gift for you.

For letting me stay in your house.

Jellied borscht with herring.

Ah.

I always felt welcome in your home.

And I'm sorry about your sister.

What do you mean.

I'm sorry she's coming.

Well, Gina, she's my sister.

But you don't like her.

Um, I don't think I ever said that.

It's not what you say. It's what you don't say.

Herring all swimming in the same direction

like chickens coming home to roost.

You think you need to talk to someone about this?

About what?

Your negative response to Christmas.

I'm not negative.

I'm just saying that Christmas has a way of bringing

out the worst in people.

- You would rather be alone. - Who said I'll be alone?

Well, I just figured, given that you have no friends...

I... no, I have friends.

You know what? I'm sorry for sharing.

It'll just be me and my sister this year.

You don't get along?

We get along fine. Yeah.

In fact, I'm really looking forward to catching up.

Mm-hmm. No, yeah, I am.

Well, I'm sure if you say it enough, it'll eventually sound

like you mean it.

Well, I mean, we have our disagreements, but she's...

you know, she's been a lot better lately,