The Leftovers

I need to cancel.

Just for tomorrow.

Yeah, sure.

You know, that's fine, so....

Okay, okay. Okay, goodbye.

Hello?

Oh, hi.

No, I have appointments all day.

Oh, yeah, we can set up ourselves.

How many chairs?

Oh, great. Great.

Okay. Okay, I'll see you after 4:00, then.

Thanks. Bye.

- So, how was your run? - It's fucking hot for October.

- Want some French toast? - Yeah.

Hey, Jill? Come on, honey. Chop, chop.

They pushed my afternoon sessions so I can meet the rental guys.

- All you have to do is get the cake. - Yeah, okay.

- Do you think he knows? - No way.

Jill, I'm waiting. Hey, when does Tommy get back?

He said he had a morning class and he'd come after that.

- All right. - So I'll see you at noon.

- You have the breeder's address? - The what?

The breeder? For the puppy?

- It has to be today? - Yeah, we have to go today,

otherwise we go on the wait list and lose our deposit.

All right, okay. Noon. I'll be there.

Have a good day.

- I love you. - Love you, too.

Don't. Please.

Mommy attack.

- Yeah! - Yeah, way too early.

- God. - Way too early, guys.

Way too early.

- Good morning. - Good morning.

Hi.

- Hi, hi. - I love you.

My bunny is really soft and...

...its ears are, like, this big and it's pretty big.

He only eats cheese crackers even if he's--

Get your hand out of the box, miss.

- And he also eats carrots. - No.

Jeremy.

Don't feed the dog.

- Hey, Dad. - Yo.

- You look nice. - Today's my interview.

Today's your interview.

You said you could take the kids to school.

Of course, I'm taking the kids to school, right, kids?

What's an interview?

- Mommy's getting a job. - Trying to get a job.

Do you want it?

- Yeah, I do. - Then you're gonna get it.

Come on.

- Mommy's getting a job. - Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

- Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! - Hey. Mommy.

Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!

- Hello? - Laurie, hi.

Dr. Singley. How are you?

Oh, hi. Fine.

I was told you canceled your appointment?

Yeah, yeah, my daughter has a science fair and I wanted to--

I really think it's important for you to come in tomorrow.

We're reaching the point of no return.

I know. I just....

I need to talk to my husband.

Well, you should do that.

- And then you'll be in tomorrow? - Yes.

Good. See you then.

Good morning.

Patti, you ready to come in?

- It's a cat? - Yeah.

But it has a pop tart for its body, and it's just shooting through space,

and it has rainbows coming out of its butt,

and it's just really happy about it.

I don't get it.

No, Dad, you don't.

And come home straight after school.

Your mom and I need help setting up for the party.

He knows, you know. It's not gonna be a surprise.

Yeah, I know, I know. Just please don't tell your mom.

- You smell like cigarettes. - What?

Bye.

What happened?

I don't know. They just all came running out.

It's a monster!

Is it gone?

- What was it? - It was a deer.

I think something terrible's about to happen.

Tell me what that feels like.

- What it feels like? - Yeah.

I mean...

...why is this time different?

Because you've said this before and we're still here.

Those times...

...they were like tremors.

This...

...this is the big one.

Like the world is gonna end.

Then tell me how it feels.

Like a hand is inside my chest.

And it's squeezing my heart tighter and tighter.

And he won't let me go until it's over.

- "He"? - What?

"He" won't let go?

- It's not about that. - It isn't?

- No, no. - It's not about Neil

telling you to leave your own house?

He paid for it.

It's his house.

That's not how it works, Patti.

But he told you to go, so you went.

And all those abusive things he said to you?

That's what makes you feel like the world is ending.

Because instead of ignoring those things,

you believe them.

You absorb them.

Well, I guess I better shit 'em back out.

Maybe you should.

Maybe you should put them in a bag,

and write Neil's name on it,

and just drop it right back off on his doorstep.

Come on.

Well, if it'll stop the world from ending, why the hell not?

Nothing's gonna stop that.

I know why you're telling jokes

because you can feel it, too, can't you?

I know you can.

Something's wrong...

...inside you.

Sorry, Patti, that's just not true.

There's nothing wrong with me.

Well, you're on the council but nobody knows who you are.

Buddy Menlo is the incumbent.

He's popular, he has built-in name recognition

and we're a month out from the election.

So if I'm being honest, barring a miracle,

I don't think you stand a chance.

Uh-huh.

And why should I hire you if you can't help me win?

Because I think you have some progressive ideas for the town--

Oh, fuck my progressive ideas.

Why do you want to do this, "Nora Durst"?

Because...

...I want to use my brain for more than figuring out

which juice box is certified organic.

I want....

I need something for myself.

I know I'm not running for mayor of New York City...

...but for the next four weeks, I need this to be your priority.

And what does that mean for the, um... juice boxes?

As far as you're concerned, for the next four weeks,

I don't have a family.

Councilwoman.

I'm in the middle of an interview.

You coming to my thing tonight?

You're not supposed to know you're having a thing tonight.

And yet I do know. You coming or not?

I'm in the middle of an interview.

Hey.

- You tell her she could beat Buddy? - Nope.

Hire her.

Now get the fuck out of here, Man of the Year.

We're just friends, so....

Moorland, you've got first and Broadway.

And don't any of you think you dodged a bullet

because you'll all be getting traffic control

until Con Ed's done with the gas lines,

which should be in about a week.

Now, in other good news, or bad news,

this heat wave's gonna continue.

So water restriction is still in place

which means you issue a ticket

to anybody who's sprinkling their lawns between 6:00 and 10:00.

And it looks like we've got ourselves a deer problem.

Reports of the fuckers getting stuck inside buildings.

One wandered into the Biggie superstore,

another jammed through Rosalie Darmody's baby shower--

Think it's just one.

- Sorry? - Deer. I think it's just one.

- Why do you think that? - I saw it this morning.

At the school?

No, I just missed it at the school. Before that.

Just a theory, Chief, maybe this thing's in heat

and just wants to fuck the lieutenant.

Fuck you, Lou.

It doesn't matter to me if it's deer singular

or deer fucking plural.

You are authorized to put it down.

Well, we don't need to kill it.

If it's dangerous and unstable, yes, we do.

We get tranq guns from animal control.

If we see it, we knock it out,

bring it back to the woods, let it go.

- Let it go? - Yes.

Okay, I'll make you a deal.

You get a tranq gun,

I'll have dispatch inform you of any sightings,

and you get there before anyone with an actual weapon....

...hallelujah. Set Bambi free.