The Venture Bros.

All right, I got 50 smackers for each and every man...

willing to work an honest day at my compound.

Who's up for it? I'm taking rocket engineers...

radar-tracking operations managers...

super fusion fuel-rod insertion specialists...

with venturilium-handling experience...

and I'm gonna need one or two guys...

who can do phased-plasma spectrum analysis.

Any takers?

Anybody?

No?

Geez. They never learn.

And they get lamer every week.

Yeah, looks like Manosaurus.

Better go check if he's got any henchmen stuck further down.

All right, all right... enough about how great you're doing!

It was a rhetorical question.

What I'm really calling about is just to...

give you a heads-up.

I've got a meeting this morning with a certain 4-star general...

to discuss a certain hot business deal with a certain me.

You got a meeting with Manhowers, huh?

- That's great, Rust. - Yes, it is.

Tell him I say hi The choppers he ordered

will be ready a week ahead of schedule.

So, anyway...

next time you do a photo shoot for one of the science rags...

get ready to move over...

because I'm lifting my self-imposed media blackout.

Hey, you saw the super-scientific American piece, did you?

That must have been one of the gals in my P.R. Department.

- Hang on a sec. - You have a Puerto Rican department?

- Hello? What? Rusty? - Still here.

- New phones. Hello? - Hello, Dr. Venture?

Hadji. Give me good news, buddy.

I wish that I could Dr. Venture, but this is not so!

Hello. I can hear you.

We have had some problems on the line.

Come on, Raj are you snowballing me?

You promised you'd put on extra shifts to make the street date.

- A thousand pardons, Dr. Venture! - Get off! Get off!

We are trying to work for you!

But I I have Jonny staying with me and he is in a bad, bad way!

- Car! - He's early.

Boys, inside. Doc! Doc! Code green!

The eagle has landed!

What am I to do?

My wife will leave me if I bring him to the house again...

but he is like my brother to me!

Brother! Hold on, Raj, I forgot.

I got Rusty on the other line.

Rusty? Has he asked you for money yet?

Hold on, Hadji. Rust, you still there?

"Crap, did he hear us?"

Places, everyone. Places!

Turn on the juice!

Dr. Venture, please.

- I got an appointment. - And you are?

General H.I. Manhowers

- United States Armed Forces. - OK, now.

Yes, yes, of course. 10 million dollars will be fine.

And anytime the European Space Agency needs more...

- you know where to find us. - Grazie, signore Ventura.

- Ciao. - Guten Tag.

Hello, you must be General Manhowers?

Well, shall I give you the grand tour?

But wait. Why walk when you can ride in style?

Moving walkway.

- "Hold all my calls!" - Venture Industries?

Dean, they can't hear you.

You don't have to pretend that hard.

They can't?

Oh, OK. I'm on.

- Morning, dad. - Hello, son!

Say, is that where my top-secret experimental hover boots have gotten to?

Sorry, pop. I couldn't resist.

They've got 1,001 uses around the home, at work...

- or in combat situations. - Boys will be boys.

Morning, Dr. Venture.

Hey, pop! Hey, pop!

Hey, pop.

All right, what's next?

Future man

Costume's on the rack, wig's over here...

- makeup's in the bottom tray. - Line? Line!

Dr. Venture, come quickly The future is in peril.

"She swoons"

"Dr. Venture catches her and they kiss passionately."

Who writes this crap?

Jeepers creepers! What do you got there?

Oh, you like that?

It's just a little stealth bomber...

I've been noodling around with in my spare time.

Now you're talking

What say we get down there for a little looky-loo?

Well, it's not finished yet

Maybe next visit.

Though I got to wonder why you'd put a big logo...

on a stealth plane.

So we can find it, of course.

And now for the coup de grace

The most highly restricted area of the Venture compound

our Rocket Research Observation Command Center

or Rrocc!

Just a sec.

Looks like it's seen better...

- Say, where is everyone? - Yeah, I gave the staff the day off.

The week. Jewish holidays.

- What the... - Not now, not now, not now.

Venture Face me, Dr. Venture!

Face me, if you dare!

I'll take care of this.

Hey. Hey!

This kind of thing happen a lot around here?

My archenemy quit

So, lately I've got every Tom, Dick, and Skeletor...

out to make a name for himself knocking on my door.

Who's that other fella talking to him?

He's another valued customer of mine.

Diplomat.

Hell of a lot of brand loyalty from the big Indian.

- Stop it! Please! - Come here, you little...

Come here!

Well, since everything seems to be under control out here...

what say we head back inside and talk business?

Nah, I think I've seen enough.

Wait. Wait! That's not all I've got.

Look! Zero-gravity pen!

It writes in space.

You keep it, son.

Truth is, you got a lot of impressive stuff here...

No two ways about it, a lot of it's the same impressive stuff

I saw back when your dad was running the show

- only it all still worked. - Is this about your shoe?

Because if you wait 20 minutes it'll come back around.

Oh, I don't know how gum got on the walkway.

Yeah, yeah, thanks for showing me around, Dr. Venture...

and for the Fruitopia.

Can't remember the last time I had one of those.

And speaking of shoes...

you haven't seen these yet Spy shoes!

The soles flip around so that the Russians

can't follow your footprints!

I call them sneakies.

Oh, stop it. It's over.

We're not really gonna have to sell the compound, are we, pa?

I don't know, Dean. I don't know.

Why don't you ask Uncle J.J. for another loan?

He's rolling in the dough.

Perhaps I can be of assistance.

I am Dr. Henry Killinger.

And this is my resume

"Freelance business consultant and executive motivational coach."

- I don't know if I can afford... - I work pro bono.

Great! When can you start?

I already have.

You cannot hope to reverse your regrettable financial straits

without increasing production and workflow.

To do this, you will need a highly skilled...

full-time staff, and here they are.

How did the...

Well, team building is a specialty of mine.

I can't... They don't look Mexican!

How am I supposed to pay all these people?

You won't. The state will.

These men are part of a work furlough program.

I call them the Venchmen.

Do you get it? Venture? Vench-men?

No, no, I get it.

I'm just imagining what the super-science workers union...

is gonna say when they get a load of the scabs.

They've been on strike for like, two years.

Dad!

The manufacturing wing It's on fire!

Looks like we're under attack again.

Everybody in the panic room. I'll take care of this.

Relax, my friend. There will be no more attacks.

What you see is not fire but industry breathing

new life into the corpse of the Venture compound.

- I've never seen it do that before. - Me neither.

Wow! You're some kind of magic man!

No, you are the magic man.

Wow!

I suggest you put that into a high-yield mutual fund.

Now, if you will excuse me I have much work to do.

Gentlemen.

Esteemed representatives of the machine workers...

nuclear engineering and custodial super-science unions

I have read your list of grievances

and am prepared to make you a very generous offer

on behalf of Venture Industries.

Who the hell are you?

Killinger, Dr. Henry Killinger.

And this is my magic murder bag.

Well, gentlemen, we have a deal on the table.

What do you say? Any takers?

"Notice of hostile takeover"?

Who? Venture? What a dick!

Wait, we're not even a publicly traded company.

FYI, I issued some shares back