American Dad!

Hayley. Hayley, wake up.

It's a horrible family emergency!

What?! God what?!

The emergency is your life isn't going anywhere,

so we're going to get you some drive.

We're going for a drive?

In a car?

No, we're going for a walk.

In our bodies.

As you know, every day I leap out of bed

and fly into my slippers.

Of course, your "leap of faith."

It shakes the whole house.

But what you don't know is every morning before my leap,

I take a brisk walk around Langley's historic

Gaslamp District to get the blood up

and the laziness down.

You go on this walk and then get back in bed?

This healthy routine gives me the drive

I need to have a successful career.

I want that for you, too.

But I already have a successful career at SubHub.

They even trust me enough to let me have a key.

A key to where?

The bathroom.

Just as I feared.

The room so awful it's where we hide

our disgusting toilets.

Hayley, SubHub is not a career.

It's a dead-end. But I'm showing you a way out,

complete with breakfast at a little place

I like to call...

Johnny Fifties!

I remember this place!

We used to come here all the time.

Johnny, my man!

Gimme a piece of toast,

and mash up these peas for me.

But only if you promise not to charge me for the peas.

They're my property, Johnny.

I won't pay for what's already mine, Johnny.

Again, Stan, my name is Sal.

The restaurant is Johnny Fif...

I'll have a shortstack of pan...

No, the food is terrible.

You just come to soak up that authentic 1990s-style

'50s atmosphere.

Stan, I've got some bad news. We're closing.

Closing?! How could this be?!

Well, people just don't care about 1950s nostalgia anymore.

Or maybe we'd have survived if, I dunno, every day

you bought something more expensive than toast.

Johnny, 86 the toast.

You can't expect people to eat

after getting terrible news like that!

No! No! Stop the music!

Not today, big brass band!

Shut up! Shut up!

You okay up there, Mr. Smith?

Johnny Fifties is going under.

It's bad news, or to put it in terms

you'll understand, bad music.

Well, if you love the place so much,

maybe you could give them a loan?

I just don't know where I'd find the money.

Anyway, you and the boys take the rest of the week off,

fully paid of course.

Well it's official, gang.

I have Hep C.

I think it's time for some major lifestyle changes...

Red alert! Family emergency!

What?! God what?!

I'm too upset to say what the emergency is.

I must carve it.

J...

O...

Oh, it's about Johnny Fifties closing.

I heard him tell the Bandleader.

Oh, yeah, Johnny Fifties!

Their food sucks.

And no Shock Top.

Okay, my fingers hurt.

It's Johnny Fifties.

I cannot let this restaurant close.

- Why? - Well, for one thing,

it's part of my morning routine.

But also, let's be honest.

I'm a '50s kind of guy.

Exhibit A... My suit.

Oh, yeah, your suit is sort of '50s.

For a '50s guy like me, letting Johnny Fifties

close would be like admitting the '50s were over.

But the '50s are over!

Don't you get it?! If you're truly nostalgic,

nothing is ever over!

As someone who was alive back then

with a Wolfman Jack-type radio DJ persona

and a number-one doo wop hit, I think Stan's onto something.

Look around this house, guys.

Not a lot of love for the '50s.

He's right. No Jell-O molds.

No hula hoops!

Plus, you're not watching TV while you eat!

And even if you were, Happy Days is never on!

There it is, but it's a bad one,

doesn't count... too much Potsie.

That's it! If I'm going to

save the restaurant...

You have to improve the food?

I need to get people to love the '50s again!

There's no time to lose!

Did you know glory holes were much, much larger in the '50s?

One time me and both Everly Brothers

stuck our junk in one together

all at the same time.

And you know who was on the other side?

The Big Bopper.

At least that's what it felt like, I never saw him.

What? Never seen a successful person before?

Is this supposed to be like Dad's

"leap of faith" out of bed?

It's a natural expression of drive.

The Regional Manager's coming to SubHub today

and I am gonna show him, and Dad,

that I've got what it takes to get ahead.

Mr. S throws our food on the ground

and she jumps all over the table?

Someone's gotta say it.

They made a mockery of breakfast.

As your regional manager, I'm here

because by now, most of you have seen the leaked documents

referring to your positions as "dead-end jobs."

What documents?

It doesn't matter.

The point here is your jobs are not dead-ends.

Yes, dead-ender in the back.

So are we allowed to drink

the Oranginas or what?

Give me a promotion!

I've got the keys to success!

Or should I say the bathroom?

Pee pee? Poo pee? What's your pleasure?

Tell me what you need, what SubHub needs,

and I am on it.

Well, we would like to open a new location

in the hugely-desirable- nearly-impossible-to-find-

an-open-space-in Gaslamp District.

I know just the place.

Johnny Fifties is closing and SubHub can take its place!

Great idea!

You're promoted!

The rest of you... demoted!

You live here now and get paid in pepperoni.

According to math,

Johnny Fifties can stay afloat for eight weeks.

And we're gonna need every minute of it

to get people to love the '50s again.

'Cause you really have to love the '50s

to stomach your signature nauseating burgers.

I mean you no disrespect, Johnny.

My name is Sal.

I call it "Operation '50s Heat Up:

Get 'Em Interested In The '50s And Save Johnny Fifties!"

What if we call it "Operation '50s Fever?"

Horrible idea. Klaus, you're going to Milwaukee

to get the statue of Arthur Fonzarelli,

aka The Bronze Fonz.

I need it! Go now!

I don't really need the Fonz statue.

We just can't have Klaus around

sloshing his bowl water all over

everyone's classic cars.

Everyone will have classic cars?

And more! Here's some concept art

I had made to inspire us.

Cruisin' cars, lawn darts, asbestos chunks,

Johnny Fifties bursting with hungry Fonzie impersonators.

Stan, you seem to be leaning pretty heavily on Fonzie.

People also like, I don't know, Elvis?

Oh, you mean Singing Fonzie. Good idea!

I always wanted to be like Marilyn Monroe

and have an air vent blow my dress up!

You'll do it! And Roger, you do your old

Wolfman Jack DJ persona.

That persona was unforgettable.

What was his name again? Wolfman Puck?

No, that's not it. Don't worry,

it'll come to me on the air.

Jeff, you're a beatnik,

and Steve, you can be a nerd or "square."

Easy. True to the time period,

I'll put tape on my glasses to make them appear broken...

No need!

Just like James Dean, I pulled my punch

so I only hurt the glasses.

No you didn't!

Hayley, you can be Spudnik.

He was a very famous potato.

Dad, you won't believe this. Your walk gave me drive.

And that drive got me a job as manager of a new SubHub