The Boy in Blue

Come on. Show him, Ned.

-Look now, it's Hanlan. Yeah.

- Go on, Ned. Run that donkey. - Come on, Ned. Go.

Keep on rowing.

Hey.

Hey, you're a cheat. Hey, that's not fair.

You bloody bugger, that's not fair. Foul.

- Cheat. Foul. - Bye.

You bastard.

Pull back, Ned. Come on.

Pull!

Come on, Ned. You got him, Ned.

Hey, Neddie, you pissed right down his backside.

Lookie, who's here?

Mr. Hanlan? Bill McCoy. We met on the water.

Dulcie, say hello to Mr. McCoy, the famous oarsman.

Hello, Mr. McCoy, the famous oarsman.

- Joining the minstrel show, Mr. Hanlan? - Putting on my business suit.

Good. I'm here on business myself.

Five bucks a case. Good stuff. Throw in the glass.

I don't need your moonshine, but I have a proposition for you.

Have you heard of the Centennial? Regatta in Philly?

All the top oarsmen will be there. The real grease-bum boys.

- So? - So I'll be your manager.

Make you some real money.

- And I'll get you a proper shell to row in. - You want me in the race?

-I saw you today. You're a natural. He was just coasting.

You should see him pulling by moonlight with the cops up his arse.

Yeah, rowing in the hot sun? Too much like work.

Who wants to go all the way to Philly for that?

Listen, nobody knows you from Adam, some hog grubber from Canada.

I could get 50-1 odds on you easy.

I've been waiting years for a sure lay like this.

No, not for me.

You don't know how good you are, do you?

Sure I do. Don't I, sweets?

I got a delivery to make.

Be nice to him, Dulcie. The man had a crushing defeat today.

-All loaded, Cooney? Yep, eight boxes.

Yeah, well, then cast off. I'm on my way.

Isn't he cute?

Strike her up, Toad.

Bye!

Watch out for the coppers, Ned. Good luck, Ned!

Bye, darling. I'll be here when you get back.

Who's there?

Repent, repent, repent, ye sinner.

Seize his godless cargo of foul liquor.

Stop where you are!

Bring him to retribution.

Shoot the bugger! Hanlan!

Come on, grab the bastard.

Come on, lads, lend a hand. Pull!

Smite him with the light, brothers.

-Shoot him! Shoot him! I said no guns!

Get the bastard!

Head him off. Get him!

Nab him. That's it, men.

Piss off.

He's getting away! I'll get you!

I'll get you, you little scum.

Boys, I can't stop. I got another delivery to make.

Oh, Ned.

Ned.

- Should we let them finish, sir? - Finish?

Give mercy to that degenerate up there? Disgusting.

It's not bad enough that he breaks the laws of God and man...

by selling illegal liquor, but he also fornicates out of wedlock.

Arrest him.

- Edward Hanlan? - Hanlan!

Oh, Ned. Hanlan!

Oh, Ned. Oh, Ned.

- It's the cops. - Oh, my, God, yes.

Edward Hanlan, stay where you are!

Edward Hanlan?

Ned!

Oh, God.

-Good morning, Mr. Hanlan. What are you doing here?

Let's just say I'm here to help you. Come on.

- What are you doing here? - We'll talk about it later.

- Maybe you'd better start rowing. - Rowing? Where?

Are you crazy? I can't catch that.

Oh, Ned, go! Stop, Hanlan!

Edward Hanlan, stop where you are.

Stop where you are or I'll shoot.

Ned! Hey, John, get the boat.

Hanlan, get back here. You're under arrest.

Not where I'm sitting, I'm not.

Beautiful morning.

I guess you won't wanna be showing your face around here for a day or so, eh?

You're in luck.

This docks at Rochester.

We'll lay low in the States for a few days.

Yeah, great, without a shirt on my back.

Not to worry. I got connections down there.

- In Rochester? - No. Philly.

Get you some new clothes. Find us a nice little room.

- You bilge rat, you set the law on me! - The qualities you'll need in a manager.

- You stool pigeon. - The suit! The suit!

You'll hurt yourself. You won't be able to row.

He's gonna dunk him.

-Back in the water, bilge rat. Steady now, there.

- Steady, steady, now. - I'm fine. I'm fine.

All right, everything's all right.

That's a hell of a way to treat your new partner.

With all the trouble I went to, arranging...

Oh, come on, you're just lucky this boat went by.

Lucky? It was planned to the minute.

All that hanky-panky of yours is what damn near buggered the works.

I can't imagine what she sees in you.

Oh, really? Same thing you saw: natural ability.

Round up, folks. Line up to see Colonel Buffalo Bill Cody...

and his incredible Wild West Show.

They perform amazing feats at this corral. That's right.

See real Indians from the Plains. See that Amazing Emily perform...

death-defying stunts above and below the ground.

Walk up! Walk up!

Cotton candy!

No, wrong. I do not agree.

Listen, I sent you a wire that... We made a deal.

- That's not what we talked about. - You go to hell.

You'll be hearing from my lawyer! You welsher! Gypster!

The little weasel. Went and said he had a shell for me, went and sold it.

-That's good, Bill. Psst, hey, mister.

I know where you can get a boat.

- Yeah? Where? - Cost you a dollar...

and one of them cigaroots.

She'll float on dew, boy.

- The... The seat's loose. - Loose?

It slides, boy. Slides, slides like butter.

I invented her. This will give you 40 yards on the mile, easy.

But all them Harvard boys with grease on their backsides won't give it a chance.

Laugh at me.

Just like him. Look at him.

Thinks I'm queer in the attic.

Go on, go on, get the hell out of here.

Going swimming, guys?

Have you figured how to fasten down that seat, Mr. Brown?

-Ah. Come on. Look at him. Look at him.

It will never work.

Easy, now.

Famous champion.

Looks great. What's it like? How's it go?

Slides like butter.

I see gambling. I see immorality.

I see unbridled lust for filthy lucre.

Betting and drinking.

You will cease these immoral acts. You will mend your ways.

Colonel! Good day to you, sir, Colonel Knox.

We ain't seen you since last year. Down here for a little flutter?

Five thousand down on Plaisted to qualify.

Let it ride on him to win tomorrow.

Ned, come on. What?

- I got 100-1 on you. - A hundred?

- They think you're a bum. - Thanks.

Oh, by the way, Merry Christmas.

- It's a beauty, eh? - It's baby blue.

It'll fit you.

Attention, please. Attention.

Gentlemen, oarsmen in the first qualifying heat...

hold your positions and prepare to start.

Mr. Hanlan, good luck to you, sir.

-Same to you, Mr. Plaisted. Gentlemen...

are you ready?

By the way, Mr. Hanlan, isn't that a crack in your oar?

Don't!

No, Ned, Ned. Left! Left, Ned!

Straighten up, Ned! Straighten up! What...? What are you doing?

- What the hell are you doing? - I'm too old to be a laughingstock, boy.

Pull, Ned, 100-1!

Pull! Pull!

Come on, Ned, 100-1!

You bring my boat?

- What the hell is that? - Fifty bucks...

for tomorrow's rental.

Ned finished second. He qualified.

He did it in your boat! Well, look happy, you old coot!

Gentlemen, we are rolling in clover.

I just turned down 1 000 bucks cash on the line...

- for Ned to pull a barney tomorrow. - Throw the race?

Half the guys in here bet on that Fred Plaisted and they're real scared.

Scared? Of me?

Mr. Hanlan? Compliments of the gents in the corner.

-See? They love me. Mr. Hanlan?

-Oscar Hale, Toronto Globe. Hello.

- Now, tell me... - You got a race tomorrow, boy.

-Drink up. Drink up. Thank you.

Now, tell me. How does it feel to be carrying your country's banner against...

They're not reading about me back home, are they?

Absolutely. You're front-page news.

- I've even given you a nickname. - Yeah? The Blue Flash?

Uh-uh.

The Boy in Blue.

That makes me sound like some kind of a fancy boy.