Transparent

Hey!

What's taking so long?

Ahh, there she is.

Whatcha got?

Prune juice and Neosporin.

You do love me.

Actually, I changed my mind,

and I'm not gonna work at home today.

I'm gonna... I'm gonna go.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no. You're not goin' anywhere.

You're gonna stay here.

You're gonna be my little nurse.

I have a lot of work to do, and I just can't do it here.

I can help you with that, just come on.

I mean, that's... I know, bring... I'll bring food.

No, please don't leave me alone with my thoughts.

Just relax and I'll be back.

- Bye. - Okay.

Love you.

Love you, too.

How was your room?

Well, I'm pretty sure I didn't get bedbugs.

Oh, congrats.

- Are you hungry? - Yeah.

Yelp says there's a diner with a strong waffle game about a mile up.

What makes a strong waffle game?

Well, honestly, uh, you know,

a waffle is just a delivery system

for the butter and the syrup,

so I'm gonna go with the butter and the syrup.

I've never actually called out before today.

Whatever. If he fires me, I'll just go somewhere else.

It's not like there isn't a million places I can go dance.

It's kind of like being a nurse.

I... I'm pretty sure what you do is a little more interesting than that.

It's actually way less crazy than everyone thinks.

It's mostly just sad guys with cocaine problems.

Sounds like the music business.

Come on, you guys probably sit in swivel chairs,

and eat ice cream sandwiches all day.

We do not.

We sit in swivel chairs and drink coconut water all day, okay?

I like coconut water.

Me, too.

I don't know, I feel like when I was a kid

I imagined a very different picture of success.

When I was a kid I was a terror.

I used to drive on mushrooms.

Drive, like, automotive vehicles?

I was out of control.

Um, I think I'm glad I met you now.

Oh, honey, I know you are.

Come with me on the journey

to Shell and Back.

To Shell and Back.

- Okay, now... - Which one's better?

Well, they were both wonderful.

Play with it, have fun, but listen, listen...

Okay, I... I'm having a little trouble.

- My neck is getting a little... - It's okay, it's okay.

- I have a little vertigo. - Now when I come around,

say your line.

Come with me on the journey to Shell and Back.

Again.

Come with me on the journey to Shell and Back.

- And... - And now I have to throw up.

Oy! Gotenyu. Buzzy, was that all right?

- It was great. - Oh, good.

- Oh, good. Good. - I'm sure we got good, good, good, stuff.

Good. All right.

- Did it sound good? - Sounded great.

The best ever.

- Oooh. - (LAUGHING)

Oh.

This is some camera.

- Yeah. - How much did it cost?

Uh... a little over a thousand bucks.

Look, Shell, this is prosumer.

With a couple of good lenses,

we can compete with movies in theaters.

Well, I don't see why we couldn't have just borrowed

a camera from Sarah and Len.

They got that really nice one for Zachary's bris.

A few years ago, but still...

I mean, and I thought that trial take that we did on my phone,

I thought that looked really great.

Babe, this is an investment in you.

You deserve this. You deserve this.

Buzzy, sweetheart, I don't want to be a noodge,

but, uh, you've racked up a lot of electronics

on my credit cards recently,

and I don't want to max them out and pay a lot of interest.

Relax, babe, I got a system.

Yeah, what system?

I enrolled you in a points program.

It's free to join and everything you buy gets you points.

And then we return the stuff, keep the points.

All these points are good for travel.

It's amazing more people haven't figured it out.

What if this stuff gets damaged

and I'm stuck with it?

I'm not an amateur, Shell.

It's just so complicated.

You know what? I... I can't stand to see this...

This long face. Come here, come here.

Wait! What are you doing?

I'm gonna let you in on my... on my little surprise.

I'm working up to a big reunion,

and I almost have enough points with everything we've got.

A big reunion with what?

Cruise tickets for the entire family.

Really? Oh, my...

There's that beautiful smile.

Oh, G...

Don't move.

Give me your glasses.

Take my glasses, babe.

All right. (SIGHS)

Thank you.

I'd just like to say

I saw an old woman walking the other day.

Hunched and hunched.

Oh, dear, this mean world.

How the wind tried to blow her down.

Um, I need some coffee. Some coffee.

- Yeah. - You here for the open mic?

No, we're just driving through.

- So... - Cool.

So, yeah, two coffees?

- Yes, please. - Um...

Gripped the walker in defiance of the gust.

They didn't get the memo about sun dried tomatoes.

Mm.

I used to work at Wrapped It Up in high school.

And we put this nasty pink sauce in everything.

And the manager used to run around going,

"No dry bites."

"No dry bites."

Over and over.

I do hate a dry bite.

Yeah, I do, too.

And it said, brother, you gotta understand.

We are the brave men.

Brave like boulders battling the sun each day.

Our faces the hardened son of warriors,

battle and battle to keep safe.

I'll be right back.

And the boys went off to war.

- (DOOR CLOSES) - And the war went on.

And on.

And on.

And on.

- (APPLAUSE) Give it up for Ron, everybody.

Yeah.

Okay, I guess that's it for today.

I want to thank you guys for coming out.

Oh, yeah, sure. Come on up here, bro.

Um, hi, everybody. Um, my name's, um...

Kevin Johnson.

Um, and I'm from Dallas.

Haven't played in a while, so hopefully this won't be too painful.

You know, for someone who never has a Seder,

you got a lot of Seder stuff.

- Remember this? - Oh, you found the Seder plate.

Oh, I love that.

You remember that big, famous, hideous Seder of 1995. (LAUGHS)

Remember that?

- With Aunt Brina? - Oh, my God, yeah.

Right? She was on OJ's side.

What did she keep saying?

Nicole was lucky to have him.

How many times did she scream that?

- I mean, yeah. - (LAUGHING)

What is all this crap?

What are you doing?

Are you, like, starting a spy operation?

What is happening here?