Supernatural

- I let Lucifer out, I gotta put him back in. - Yes.

Sammy is long gone.

Sam has been locked in the cage...

...with Michael and Lucifer.

It's his soul. It's gone.

I can't erase Sam's hell, but I can put it behind a wall.

Keep digging, Dean.

- Are you gonna be cryptic or...? - It's about the souls.

I will save Sam...

...but only if you stand down.

- What happened to you? - I'm at war.

I wanna discuss a simple business transaction, that's all.

You wanna make a deal?

- With me? - It's the souls.

They're all inside me.

Millions upon millions of souls.

Angel blade won't work because I'm not an angel anymore.

I'm your new God.

You will bow down and profess your love...

...unto me, your Lord...

...or I shall destroy you.

Well, all right then.

Is this good or you want the whole forehead to the carpet thing?

Guys.

Stop.

What's the point if you don't mean it?

You fear me.

Not love, not respect. Just fear.

- Cass... - Sam, you have nothing to say to me.

You stabbed me in the back.

Get up.

- Cass, come on. This is not you. - The Castiel you knew is gone.

So, what then? Kill us?

What a brave little ant you are. You know you're powerless.

You wouldn't dare move against me again. That would be pointless.

So I have no need to kill you.

Not now.

Besides, once, you were my favorite pets before you turned and bit me.

- Who are you? - I'm God.

And if you stay in your place, you may live in my kingdom.

If you rise up, I will strike you down.

Not doing so well, are you, Sam?

I'm fine.

- I'm fine. - You said you'd fix him.

- You promised. - If you stood down...

...which you hardly did.

Be thankful for my mercy. I could have cast you back in the pit.

Cass, come on, this is nuts.

You can turn this around, please.

I hope for your sake this is the last you see me.

Sam, you okay?

Understand.

If you followed Raphael, if you stood against me...

...punishment is certain.

There is nowhere to hide.

The rest of you...

...our Father left a long time ago.

That was hard.

I thought the answer was free will.

But I understand now.

You need a firm hand.

You need a father.

And I am your father now.

Be obedient, children...

...or this will be your fate.

It is a new day...

...on Earth and in heaven.

Rejoice.

Come on.

Come on, baby.

So you fixing her or primal screaming?

Yeah.

Thanks.

Sam?

- He's still under but alive. - Oh, yeah?

What about God part deux?

I got all kinds of feelers out. So far, diddly.

And what exactly are you looking for?

Exactly. What?

Miracles, mass visions, trench coat on a tortilla?

- I don't know what I'm looking for. - Ah, well, he'll surface.

So say we do suss out...

- ...where New and Improved flew off to. - Yeah?

Hell we plan to do about it?

Well, I don't know, Bobby. I got no more clue than you do.

I don't even know what book to hit for this.

Well, figure it out.

I'm sorry.

This ain't in no book.

If you stick your neck out, Cass steps on it.

So you know what I'm gonna do?

What?

I'm gonna fix this car.

Because that's what I can do.

I can work on her till she's mint.

And when Sam wakes up, no matter what shape he's in...

...we glue him back together too.

We owe him that.

I'm with you.

Hey, Dean.

Oh, you're, uh, walking and talking.

Yeah. I, uh...

I put on my own socks. Whole nine, heh.

Well, that's, um...

- I mean, uh, you sure you're okay? - Yeah.

My head hurts a little, but basically...

- Seriously? - I'm as surprised as you are...

- ...but, yeah, I swear. - Good.

No reason to put the gift horse under a microscope, right?

Yeah. So, what happened with Cass?

- Help me with the car, I'll fill you in. - Okay.

Plenty speak for them and their so-called lifestyle.

Media, Hollywood.

Lady Gaga won't shut up for love or money.

Yeah, funny. But that's why we raise our voices...

...and picket their so-called weddings and their funerals.

Someone has to speak for God.

And who says you speak for God?

You're wrong. I am utterly indifferent to sexual orientation.

On the other hand...

...I cannot abide hypocrites like you, Reverend.

- Okay, fun is over, friend. - Tell your flock...

...where your genitals have been before you speak for me.

- And who the heck are you? - I'm God.

And he who lies in my name shall choke on his own false tongue.

And his poisonous words shall betray him.

- Mister. - For I am the Lord...

...your God.

Castiel.

Cass.

Sam.

No. No, no, no, this can't be happening.

Sam.

Sammy.

Hey, Sam?

What, are you taking a nap down here?

- It's Cass, we think. Come on. - Yeah.

Coming.

Sudden deaths of some 200...

...religious leaders are currently under investigation.

The Vatican has yet to issue a statement.

But some are already calling this an act of God.

We all saw him, no beard...

...ho robe.

He was young and...

And sexy.

He had a raincoat.

Believed to be targeted hits high up...

...In white supremacy organizations.

The FBI now believes the Ku Klux Klan has been forced...

- ...to disband. - Can't argue with that one.

Freak lightning strike on the heels of the fire...

...that burned down the Center for Vibrational Enlightenment today.

Said a spokesman, "This tragedy represents the largest loss...

...in New Age motivational speaker history."

- Motivational speakers? - Yeah.

I'm not sure new Cass gets irony any better than old Cass.

Of course, old Cass wouldn't smite Madison Square Garden...

...just to prove a point. He is off the deep end of the deep end.

And there's no slowing down.

So, what? Try to talk to him again?

- Sam... - All we can do is talk to the guy.

He's not a guy, he's God. And he's pissed.

And when God gets righteous, get out of the way.

- Haven't you read the Bible? - I guess.

Cass is never coming back.

He's lied to us, used us, cracked your gourd like it was nothing.

- No more. We've spent enough on him. - Okay.

Hand me that socket wrench.

In biblical times.

Leprosy was once so prevalent, colonies were found around the world.

Today, we're witnessing the unprecedented shutdown...

...of India's leper colonies...

...after what many are calling a miracle healing.

Here with us, health correspondent, Rob Lewitski.

Educate me, Lewitski.

And now someone else Is gettin' all your best.

Hello, Crowley.

These boots are made for walking.

You look stressed.

And that's just what they'll do.

Bollocks.

These boots Are gonna walk all over you.

So the jig is up.

- You found me. - I never lost you.

These scratches, they're all useless.

Still, can't blame a girl for trying.

- You fancy a drink before you smite me? - No.

You like to bend them right over, do you?

Let's go.

I'm not going to kill you, Crowley. I have plans for you.

- What? - Here's our new arrangement.

I let you live, you return to your post as king of hell.

- But? - But I choose where each soul goes.

- But... - I control the flow...

...and you take whatever I give you.

I take it you intend to keep the lion's share.

So, what you're saying is hell is being downsized.

I would've done away with it...

...but I need a threat to hold over my enemies.