Xiara's Song

Subject matters.

And now, the Cinemax ReelLife documentary.

She's going to start singing because I just forgot the song.

I forgot.

No, you were like,

Remember, you were like this.

You were like,

Try to sing it, please.

You started doing that.

And then we turned around.

to hear about you.

Remember?

To--

She's going to cry, because her father went to jail too.

Can y'all hold it down?

Hold it down!

I know.

Don't fuck me.

Fuck with me.

Don't fuck me; fuck with me.

Yeah.

Fuck you.

I'm called The Lyrical Don Arson, rap terrorist.

And my real name is Harold Linares.

I'm basically incarcerated for criminal possession of a weapon

by an ex-convict, okay,

which carries some heavy time in D.C. because D.C.'s all federal.

I wasn't out there hustling.

I wasn't out there living in the streets.

You know, I was doing music; I was doing shows.

I was having fun, right?

But I got caught up in too much drinking--

Yeah, that's where we at.

Before I ended up one night that I wanted to go

out drinking and partying at the Go-Go Club.

I ended up here.

See, I dream of hip-hop.

I dream of crushing this world with lyricism,

of showing the world what skills that I have,

the talents that I have.

Every set you know the whole universe will fit,

you know what I'm saying?

It's the way the world goes

round and round, round and round.

Oh, yeah, time to go.

No puedo pagarte ya.

I love you.

I love you.

What?

Hi, baby.

Hi, Daddy.

My daughter's six.

She's six now; her name's Xiara.

She's anything any parent would want, you know?

And I'm hoping that, in due time,

I would be the parent that she wants,

you know, that she needs.

This is, like, my favorite place to come

maybe because when I'm sad,

it makes me happy.

Look, I can throw.

Why does this place make you happy?

Because my dad was here

with me.

We were all the way on the other side.

But this is my favorite place right here.

She has her own little stories.

Last year, she went and told a babysitter

that her dad had killed a few people.

Yeah, she's always making up stories.

Uh-uh.

Maybe one day she's gonna be a--

she's going to write books or something.

I'm going to be a superstar.

She's going to be a-- she keeps saying that.

No, that's what my dream is.

Yeah, her teacher asked her to write something about,

I don't know--

What do I want to be when I grow up?

What do I want to be--

Yeah.

Yeah, and then she says-- the teacher said,

"Well, she keeps saying she's going to be a superstar."

I keep saying it because I want to.

What kind of superstar you want to be?

Mommy!

God!

One of these days, when I grow up and she's an old lady,

I'm going to be making fun of her.

I'm going to be telling her,

"You sit in that chair right there."

That's mean.

You can't say that to old people.

Well, you--all the stuff that you do to me,

you're going to pay it.

That's mean.

That is mean.

I know it is.

Yeah, she has her daddy's attitude.

She wants-- he loves to dance.

She loves to dance.

She likes to make her own songs.

What else she does?

Certain things that I wouldn't like her to do.

Like what?

Like steal.

No, I mean, yeah, yeah, she likes taking stuff

that doesn't belong to her--

Sometimes.

I want to go inside, and she still keep talking about me now.

No, but that's--

Can I go inside? Thank you.

No, you're going to sit right here.

Sit; sit down.

I don't got to.

See, that is her father's attitude.

You had to talk about me.

Get down here.

No, you're embarrassing me.

Sit up, Xiara.

No.

My back is hurting.

Sit up.

No, my back hurts, I'm telling you--

unless you tickle my heel.

Mmm, all right.

I don't never tickle you, so--

My dad would.

Yeah, but that's your dad.

I'm not your dad; I'm your mom.

Hmm.

That's why I love my father more.

That's okay.

I don't have a problem with that.

Yeah, but then when he comes,

I'm going to move in with him, okay?

Mmm, no.

Yes, I am.

You can't just move right in--

I could; I want to move with him.

Mm-mm.

I do, Mama--

Well, you shouldn't be making plans now,

because he's not here, so--

1-6-28.

Come on, Harold.

Here he comes. here he comes.

Here he comes. here he comes.

Hey, baby.

Hi, Papi.

What's up, baby?

That's what I'm talking about, man.

Aw.

How you doing, baby?

Good. Fine.

Fine?

Mm-hmm.

I got you out of work?

No, not really.

Not really? smooch!

No, I was rushing.

What's up?

Xiara, look at you now.

You all right, baby?

I feel nervous.