Home from the Hill

Behind you.

Who the hell did this to me?

- Cut him off. - Are you bad off?

Well, I'm hit. I know that.

Cut him off. Hustle him over to the captain.

Come on, get in there.

Get up, you varmint.

Get up there and stand on your feet.

This here was what was out there trying to pick you off, Captain Wade.

I don't believe I know you.

You know my wife. You stay away from her.

What do you want us to do with him, Wade?

You want to call the sheriff in on this?

What do you say, boy? What am I gonna do with you?

I don't care what you do with me. Stay away from Ellie.

Come on, kid.

Turn him loose.

If you've got troubles at home, maybe that's where you ought to be.

Next time, I won't miss.

You ain't got one more shot in you, boy.

Before I bleed to death...

...I'd like a swallow of whiskey and some medical attention.

No. Never mind.

Wade, I'm gonna tell you...

...how we small-town Texans get our name for violence.

It's grown men like you still playing guns and cars.

You never will grow up, will you?

It's getting to where a man isn't a man anymore unless he uses up a car a year...

...goes down the road at 100 miles an hour...

...owns six or seven fancy shotguns, knows six or seven fancy ladies.

How long is it gonna be before I can use this arm?

You just be thankful that you still got it.

This sporting life's gonna do you in yet, hear?

- That's possible. - That's for sure.

Here.

It's open season on you as long as you go poaching on the preserves of love.

That is the way it happened, isn't it?

I take it as my right to cross any man's fences when I'm hunting.

Game, yes, but women, no.

Your job is just to bandage me up, Reuben, not to preach.

I believe I know my job, captain.

In case anybody wants to bring it up, this was a hunting accident.

Nobody's gonna hear anything different from me.

I'm a friend of your wife, remember? A good friend.

Light me a cigarette.

And drive slow. I'm in no hurry to get home.

That young hothead that was laying for me this morning, you know him?

- I see him around. - What's his story?

- He loves his wife. - Well, I gathered that.

I'll tell you something...

...I can't even remember which one she was.

Well, he's only got one woman, so he has no trouble keeping them straight.

Well, you think that gives him the right to take a shot at me?

I would have.

That reminds me, I haven't gotten around to thanking you.

Sir?

I'm in the prime of life. I'm anxious to stay that way.

If it hadn't been for you, I'd be cold meat right now in the back of this truck.

Well, as long as you're so glad to be alive...

...such a generous frame of mind, I wouldn't say no...

...if you gave me that double-barreled, 12- gauge bird gun you keep locked up.

I'm not paying you for my life, Rafe, I'm just thanking you for it.

What you don't ask for in this world, captain, you don't get.

Look, I take care of you. Good care.

You get seed. You got liquor, tobacco.

You hunt my woods, you fish my streams.

You own a change of clothes, live rent-free. Got steady employment.

You wanna improve your station in life, you can just move on any time.

No, sir. I go where you go.

Well, then don't press, Rafe.

You pick me up here at 6:00 in the morning.

- Right. - And you be on time, hear?

Hey, Chauncey?

Chauncey.

Melba?

Chauncey!

Melba!

Is there anybody in this house?

I'm here.

You need some help, Wade?

Yes, I need some help, Wade, if you can stand the sight of blood.

Oh, it doesn't bother me.

Hannah, you're a cool one.

I could walk in here with my head under my arm and you wouldn't turn a hair.

You look a little pale, Wade. Would you like some whiskey?

I've had some whiskey, Hannah. Lot of it.

Is there something you want me to do for you, Wade?

Yes, there's something I'd like you to do for me, dear.

You might offer me a kind word.

I'm very sorry you were hurt.

Well, I guess that will have to do for the moment.

Now, come on over here and cut me out of this shirt.

- Let me tell you about this little accident. - I've already heard.

News travels fast in this town.

I've had three telephone calls about it.

Who was it couldn't wait to call?

The one said she was a friend...

...and two were anonymous.

What kind of scum would call up to spread dirt...

...and not even have the guts to say who they were?

They've called before.

All right, Hannah, here's my version.

I kicked Ben Ramsay's shotgun getting out of the truck...

...and it went off in my face.

You're not about to believe that story, are you?

Some day, some husband's gonna kill you.

Well, that shouldn't cause you too much concern.

I'm heavily insured.

When it happens, what am I supposed to tell my son?

That you were caught in some out-of-the-way hotel...

...or climbing into somebody's back bedroom...

...in the dead of night with your shoes in your hand?

Or that some poor young boy, married three months, shot at you?

You might tell him I'd have stayed at home...

...if there was anything at all to stay home for.

Theron's only 17 years old.

We won't tell him anything, Wade.

Hey, ain't that the captain's boy?

Captain's boy nothing, that's Hannah's boy.

Getting old for apron strings, ain't he?

I don't know how old he is, but that kid sure is mossy green.

You can send him after pigeon's milk or a left-handed monkey wrench, he'd go.

I bet we could even get that kid to go on a snipe hunt.

He doesn't even know there's no such thing as snipe hunting at night?

No, he don't. I show you.

Evening, Theron.

Good evening, Mr. Gibbons. Mr. Macauley.

Mr. Bradley, Mr. Stiles, Mr. Skaggs, Mr. Dinwoodie.

You kicking around town all alone on a Saturday night?

Where's your girlfriend?

Oh, maybe he's got more than one girl and just can't make up his mind.

Ain't that right, Theron? Sit down.

- Well, you sure? - Oh, come on, Theron, sit down.

Well, thank you.

You know, this is a mighty nice night for a snipe hunt.

- Yeah, it is at that. - It is snipe weather, all right.

Oh, they like it when it's balmy like this.

Yeah, this is the mating season and they'll be out there in droves.

What do you say, you boys interested in snipe hunting?

Yeah, I ain't been snipe hunting in years.

- I'm game. Let's go. - I was hoping you'd ask me.

Hold on, Peyton, there's five already and the tires on my truck ain't so-

Oh, come on, Hugh. One more ain't gonna hurt.

Well, all right, but no more.

Tarnation, tarnation, I can't go. I forgot I promised to drop in on Louella.

- You don't suppose- - What's that, son?

Oh, nothing.

I was gonna ask if you'd mind if I came along.

I'd just watch and I'd keep out of the way, because-

But you ain't never had hunting experience, now, have you, son?

- Well, no sir, but I- - Well, there you are. Sorry.

Now, just a minute, Hugh...

...you had to get a start yourself once. Don't be hard on the boy.

Remember, the captain's the best hunter we got in these parts.

- He is that. - He's the man...

...that killed the last wild boar in northeast Texas.

Oh, I know that.

And the fruit don't fall too far from the tree.

All right, but if anything goes wrong, it's your fault.

Remember, I was against it.

Come on, Theron, pay no attention to him.

We're glad to have you with us.

- Glad to have you with us. - All aboard.

Come on, boy.

This looks like a good place.

They'll be coming down here to the pond to feed.

- Who's gonna be the catcher? - Why not Theron?

Make Theron the catcher? Are you out of your minds?

You see, I haven't had much experience-

Oh, come on, Hugh. Let's let Theron catch.

Sure, there's gotta be a first time, Hugh.

All right, but I hope you don't ruin everything.

- No, sir. I'll do my very best. - Come on, Theron. Be very quiet.

Right there by the stump. That's a good place there.

Right there.

Now, get down there and hold this sack wide open.

They'll come when they hear you whistle. Hugh, where's the whistle?

Oh, thank you, Mr. Macauley.

Now, you keep blowing this whistle real soft, like this:

We're gonna go through the bushes and drive them towards you.

Everybody get a stick.

- Soft. - I'm sorry, I didn't mean-

- Understand? - Yes, oh, yes.

Be quiet.

You two best be quiet.

Two hours.

Most of them catch on they've been had in about 15 minutes.

Think we ought to go back and end it?

Yeah, the joke's over.

- Evening, men. - Evening, Wade.

- Hi, Wade. - Captain.

Have any of y'all seen my boy? He didn't come home.

His mama's worried.

He's out at Miller's Pond, Wade.

- What's he doing there? - Well, maybe we'd better show you.

Catching any?

Looks like you're the victim of a little local humor, son.

I guess this makes me out to be a real jackass, doesn't it?

Well, you're not the first one.

I was taken on one of these things once myself.