Columbo

What are you waiting for? Get an ambulance.

Please leave the room, darling. You know I like to bathe in private.

Mark, I didn't mean to kill her.

- Okay? - Okay.

Take it easy! What are you trying to do, break my head?

Say it.

Yes, darling, completely.

You're wasting your time and my time and the department's time.

I left Margaret at home.

Yes?

Margaret?

Is that you, Hugh?

Is, uh, is Mark there? It's important.

Sorry, Hugh. It's Tuesday. Club night.

I can always tell. Comes right after Monday.

Monday, Mark works late.

Oh, right.

Um, well, I'll... I'll get him at the club.

Mr. Caldwell, good to see you, sir.

Oh, yes, Charles. Thank you. I, uh,

I'm looking for Mr. Halperin.

Over there, sir. The usual Tuesday night game, you know?

Mr. Lawrence is having quite a run with the dice.

Simply amazing. I've never...

Hugh, how are you? It's been forever.

Play it for $3,200, Mark,

unless you want to resign at $1,600.

Hi, Hugh.

Hi, Mark.

Byron, I think your dice are about to turn cold.

The Army may have taught you bravery, Mark, but I'm not so sure about your judgment.

You still need doubles to win.

You see, Byron, sometimes a little boldness is exactly what's called for.

Uh, Mark, excuse me.

Could I talk to you for a second?

What's the matter?

I just... I'd just like to see you for a second.

All right. Be back in a minute.

Don't go away, huh. What's the matter?

Nothing. I just want to talk to you for a minute.

- Something wrong? - No.

- Danny, bring us a double Scotch, will you? - Yes, sir, Mr. Halperin. Right away.

- Are you sure she's dead? - Yeah.

It just happened.

We were... we were fighting.

We were screaming at each other.

I was sure she was gonna see somebody tonight.

She came at me, and I must have grabbed her by the throat.

All right. Take it easy. Take it easy.

I didn't know what I was doing.

I just saw her face looking up at me...

and then when I realized what I was doing, I let her go.

- And she just fell. - Calm down. Calm down.

Mark, you gotta tell me what to do.

All right.

Now, was there anyone else in the house when this happened? Was the maid there?

No, she, uh, she left about 8:15, when I got home.

Right. Right.

Did you call anyone?

Just your place. Margaret told me you were here.

- But you didn't say anything to her? - No.

Or maybe I should call Fred. He doesn't handle criminal cases.

- But he must know somebody... - No. No.

Or maybe I should go to the police.

Mark, I didn't mean to kill her.

Hugh, you can't afford to do that.

Everyone knows the problems you and Janice were having.

Now, listen to me.

It's almost 10:00.

I want you to go in the other bar, there are more people in there.

At exactly 10:30, I want you to call your house.

I'll answer the phone.

You pretend it's Janice.

Make sure the bartender and anyone else in the bar overhears your conversation.

- Why? - You want me to help you, don't you?

All right. Do as I say.

All right, Mark. Fine.

Janice, is that you?

Are you in a bar?

Yes, yes, that's right. Is everything all right?

Everything's just fine.

Now listen to me.

She's gone to bed early,

she's not going to wait up for you. Do you understand?

Yes, yes, darling. Of course, you must be exhausted.

Get a good night's sleep, and I'll see you in the morning.

All right.

Say it.

All right, you get a good night's sleep, and I'll see you in the morning, huh?

All right. Fine, Hugh. You're doing just fine. Now listen to me.

You stay right there in the bar and don't move...

until the police contact you. Do you understand?

Yes. Yes, dear. Yes. Perfectly.

Yes, good night, darling.

Ah, she's been out all day shopping. She's exhausted.

Yes, sir.

She's gettin' ready for bed now. I guess it won't hurt to have another one.

Mark, is that you?

It's me.

Hi.

Ah.

You're home early tonight, Mark.

I was a little tired.

What's this?

Another one of your bleeding-heart friends get into print?

Did you win tonight, Mark, or is that a silly question?

Oddly enough, I did.

- Wonderful. - Yeah.

That means I won't have to write you a check this week.

That will be refreshing.

Won't it be? For both of us.

Did I tell you I'm speaking at the Holcombe House tomorrow evening?

- They've named me "Woman of the Year." - Really?

- How much is that going to cost you? - Oh, don't be crude.

My, my, "Woman of the Year," that's quite an honor.

Playing queen bee to a motley assortment of junkies, pushers, and losers.

You know, I don't know how much money you've pumped into your assorted charities,

Margaret, but it's a lot more than any $10 trophy they're going to hand you.

Not tonight, please.

Darling, if you're embarrassed by all your millions,

why don't you just sign them over to me?

They wouldn't embarrass me in the least.

Money is a weapon, Mark,

a tool to be used for good, if it's used properly.

Hmm. Properly? I see.

That means handing it out like Halloween candy to a bunch of grifters...

who've never done a day's work in their lives?

- 'Cause nobody has ever given them a chance. - Come on, Margaret.

Do you know what it's like to be an ex-convict trying to find honest work?

Margaret, please.

Please don't lecture me on ex-cons.

I wrote that book.

- Margaret. - What is it?

A man. I just saw a man running from the Caldwell house.

What?

Yeah.

All the lights are on over there.

I don't like the looks of that.

I don't see anyone.

Uh, do you think the man could have been Hugh?

No, no, I left Hugh at the club.

There's no answer.

I think something's wrong.

Police headquarters. Sgt. De Maio.

Sergeant, this is Deputy Commissioner Halperin.

Yes, sir. Yes, Commissioner.

Uh, I just saw a man,

a strange man, running from a house on, uh... on Fairfax Drive.

I want you to dispatch a unit over there immediately. Will you?

Uh, the number is 1278 Fairfax Drive.

Right.

I dropped my cigar.

- Is that it there, Lieutenant? - Where?

Under there.

Wait a minute.

I don't want to burn up the Commissioner's car.

Oh. I got it. I grabbed the wrong end.

Come here, you little rascal. Okay.

That looks okay.

Officer, do me a favor, huh? Look under there and make sure nothing's burning.

All right, Lieutenant.

- Uh, everything's okay, Lieutenant. - You sure?

- Positive. - Look again.

Right, Lieutenant.

What's missing?

Just her jewelry.

He never went near the paintings nor the silverware.

There's a vase out there worth a couple of thousand dollars.

He never touched that.

It's the same guy, all right.

All right, I want you to pick up every known burglar in the morning.

If you talked to them before, talk to them again.

- If you need any extra men, let me know. - Yes, sir.

Columbo, it's about time you showed up.

Yes sir. I'm sorry. It was my car. The battery went dead.

Commissioner, your car is here now.

Tried to get my wife's car. She was at my sister-in-law's,

so I called there... It's a boring story.

Thank you very much for sending your car. I appreciate it.

It's quite all right. Duffy will fill you in on what's happened.

It's the same man who's been hitting this area in the past few weeks.

The M.O. 's identical.

I see. Well, maybe I better look around.

Good looking broad except for the marks around her neck.

Certainly is.

What do you figure happened?

Looks like she was getting ready to hit the sack.

Probably heard the guy down here, came down to see what was goin' on.

Could've just called us, but she's gotta make like a hero, right?

How long has she been dead?

Not too long.

She talked to her husband on the phone about an hour ago. Yeah, an hour ago.

Okay. It's all yours. Thank you.

Find anything yet?

Just a few smudges on this jewelry box. But everything else looks pretty clean.

Sergeant, did you dust these handles yet?

Not yet, Lieutenant.

Well, let me know if you find anything.

I think you're wasting your time, Lieutenant.

This is the fourth time I've been in this neighborhood in two weeks.