Love & Jane

Oh, fiddlesticks.

I am sorry.

Oh.

I was going to buy this.

-Sorry. This one has already been purchased.

-How could it have been purchased?

I just found it on the shelf.

-It was bought online exactly... one minute ago.

-Wait a second. Wait a second.

You're saying that someone who bought it on the internet

trumps a real-life human

who wants to buy it in the bookstore?

I'm afraid so.

But I can order you another one,

it'll be here in... two days.

I need it now!

-You're so desperate for Jane Austen, you can't wait two days?

-Yes. I left my copy at home.

-Wait. You already have a copy?

Oh, okay. Have you read Northanger Abbey?

We have that one. It's Jane Austen as well...

-You cannot just trade out one Jane Austen novel for another.

They are all unique.

Right.

Well, I can't sell you this one

because it's already been bought.

But I can order you one and it will be here in two days.

This is preposterous.

I am outraged!

I cannot believe this. The audacity.

I hate the internet.

Okay.

-No rush Lilly, they've all got their drinks.

Oh, thank you Mr. Whitcomb.

Oh.

-I was afraid you weren't going to make it.

-I encountered the most disagreeable man on my way here.

Wait... isn't that...

What?

-Isn't that what Elizabeth calls Mr. Darcy

when she first meets him.

-Trust me, Alisha, this fellow was no Mr. Darcy.

Tell me, dear.

Have you booked your trip to England yet?

No. Not yet, but soon.

-I heard that there's a National Jane Austen Society Conference.

I mean, maybe... we should all plan a trip there.

-Could be fun. I'll do some research.

But in the meantime,

I think we should get tonight's meeting underway.

Welcome everyone to our third Jane Society meeting

of the year.

And since this is the first time some of you are joining us,

I thought we could start with having you share something

you love about Jane before we get to tonight's topic.

No one?

No one at all?

Alejandro, welcome.

You don't have to raise your hand.

Oh.

What do you love about Jane.

I... I love the characters.

-Is there one character in particular

that you especially adore?

Emma.

From the novel Emma.

Of course.

So um, why do you enjoy Emma so much?

Oh, um, it's hard to explain.

-Couldn't you just try? A little.

I just...

I think...I just like the way she wants to help the people

around her find love,

like even if it kind of goes wrong sometimes.

That goes right to my heart.

-Well I for one could read that novel a dozen times...

and I have!

Well, I know that I'm new here

and haven't read as widely as some of you...

but when I finished Pride a couple of days ago,

I immediately thought about my sisters

and how much I love them.

How many sisters do you have?

-Four! -Oh.

Just like Elizabeth!

Wow.

-I mean who would have thought Regency England

would be so similar to a Punjabi household.

-Well, Jane definitely has a lot to say about families,

that's for sure.

Yeah.

Anyone else?

Barry?

-I work trucking and I just enjoy listening

to the audio books when I'm on a long haul.

There's nothing like losing yourself in the tribulations

of the Dashwood sisters to make the miles pass by.

Do you have a favorite one?

Do you have a favorite sister?

-Uh, no I mean they all drive me crazy.

Lilly, since you're president,

I think you should tell us what you especially love about Jane.

-If I had to say one thing that I love the most about Jane...

it's the romance.

Seeing the passion grow between the characters,

seeing them come together.

Feeling the inevitability of that.

Just seems very far away from today.

-It's a lot more romantic than hoping the perfect guy

is going to swipe right.

Yeah, well...

when it comes to the lack of romance that's nothing.

Believe me.

-Every Jane book ends in the perfect marriage of two minds,

and I think that's what everyone wants.

Mmhmm.

Okay Let's get to tonight's topic.

Surprise proposals and secret engagements.

Ooh.

Muriel, you start.

Alright everyone, our topic for the next meeting:

“Wickham, Willoughby and William Elliott -

"Austen's dastardly rakes”

Don't forget, do your reading.

Thank you.

-Thanks again for your suggestion of which audiobook

of Pride to listen to.

There were so many to choose from.

My pleasure.

Are we going to see you at the next meeting?

For sure.

I arrange all my long hauls around our club meetings now.

Wonderful!

-I never would have thought Jane would be for him.

-Oh Alisha, you'll learn Jane is for everyone.

Where is the lie?

Exactly.

Lilly? Could I have a word?

Of course.

-I'll meet you outside. -Here, I'll take this.

Okay.

-Mr. Whitcomb, thank you so much for hosting us.

Can I please pay you something?

Noooo.

Having you Jane lovers around elevates the place.

So, there's no need.

Plus, you all don't mind a glass of wine.

Your very sweet.

-Well, I hope you still think that after I give you

some bad news.

I've decided to...to sell off this old place.

What!?

-I'm afraid it's time for me to retire.

Congratulations Mr. Whitcomb!

Why would I think that's bad news?

-Well, it's just that there's very little chance of this place

remaining as is.

You know, with all the tech money

flowing into the neighborhood.

I'm almost positive you'll have to find somewhere new

for your meetings, dear.

Don't you worry about that.

How long before you close your doors?

-It's all happening terribly fast.

We'll be shuttered by the end of the month, I'm afraid.

Thought I make take up one of those Jane novels

you lot all love so much, give it a try.

-We'll make a Jane-ite of you yet.

Goodnight Mr. Whitcomb.

Goodnight dear.

So, what are you going to do?

-I don't know, when I first started looking

for locations for our meetings everywhere was so expensive.

Mr. Whitcomb never charged us a dime.

-Okay well, couldn't we all chip in a little?

I'm sure we could come up with enough.

-It's not just about the money. It's about the location.

An old English pub was so perfect.

-And you can't find another pub in all of Boston?

Of course, I'm sure we can,

but they're filed with Celtics fans watching the game

and that is not exactly...

...the atmosphere for what we're up to.

Oh Martin.

Boyfriend check-in?

But you know what?

He might have an idea for us,

he's got plenty of suggestions for how I should live my life.

Ah, that type.

-I always wanted to have a relationship

where we didn't just finish each other's sentences,

we could begin them.

“There could have been no two hearts so open,

"no tastes so similar, no feelings so in unison”

Wait, is that Jane?

Of course.

She has the perfect quote for every occasion.

-Hey. -Hey.

Sorry I'm late.

Oh. You look wonderful.