Abbott Elementary

Mm. Vision. I love it.

Lil Uzi Vert.

I'd be sure to throw away all my trash today.

Oh, right. Of course.

Ant season?

Ghost season.

That's funny.

Nothing funny about it, playboy.

The janitor used to work right here...

spent his days picking up trash.

Was good at it, too.

But he couldn't stop people

from leaving their trash everywhere.

And it haunted him till the day he died

mysteriously on Halloween, right here,

in the very basement of this school.

What?

Every Halloween, if you listen closely,

you can hear the wheels of his mop bucket

rolling down there.

Ohh!

Happy Halloween, Gregory.

Or, uh should I say...

Kareem Abdul-Jabbar from "Airplane!"?

No, he's my friend Steve. You'll meet him.

N-No, I'm Sully Sullenberger.

Chesley Burnett Sullenberger?

A.K.A. the pilot who landed the plane on the Hudson River?

Ooh, ooh! Guess mine.

The Hamburglar?

Clearly, you're wage theft.

Ah! Exactly!

So that's the costume you get?

Happy Halloween, y'all!

Reap the whirlwind of Storm!

Look at all these bee-autiful costumes.

Hey, baby!

Oh, I love Halloween.

Best holiday... by far.

Disguises, crime, lookin' hot?

These are my specialties.

We're both Scarlet Witch!

We look exactly the same.

Yeah, I don't know about exact.

I started working on my costume in July.

So did I! Look.

That costume is trash.

Oh, look, Mr. Johnson, he's you!

That's pretty cute.

But I didn't approve my likeness rights.

You better lawyer up, kid.

Let's play the mirror game.

Or you know what?

They turned the library into a haunted house,

and they're keeping all the candy in there

till the end of the day

when they hand it out to the kids,

so why don't you go in there and guard the candy?

Doesn't that sound like fun?

That sounds super boring.

You said you didn't want to play the mirror game,

but it honestly feels like we are.

It's crazy.

Ah.

Black Frank Abagnale Jr.!

Uh... Uh-oh.

Somebody's going hard in the paint.

Bewm, bewm, beww!

That is the best and maybe only

James Harden costume I've ever seen.

Thank you.

Oh, my God. Did you see Jacob's costume?

He's wage theft.

I guessed it on the first try.

Mm-hmm. Oh, my God.

- That is a good costume. - Thank you.

Yes, millennial Tuskegee airman.

I love that.

"Red Tails"? So underrated.

Oh! Ooh.

Ha-ha! Got him.

I knew he was a regular Tuskegee airman, not a millennial one.

Did you see his face?

Where is it?

Oh.

Ooh, she a basketball fan. I am.

Hey, Amber.

- What are you dressed as? - A bad bitch.

Oh, language.

Okay, see you later.

Good morning, everyone.

Janine?

- Oh, my God! - Oh, my God. Erika?

I haven't seen you since high school.

I know!

It's been forever! I know.

Last time I saw you was at our graduation party.

Yeah. You brought "Trivial Pursuit."

Yes, and people had fun playing it

in between illegal drinking.

What are you doing here?

Oh, well, I guess my nephew's in your class.

He's dressed as Baby Thanos.

I'm helping my sister with drop off this week.

How are you doing, though?

I saw on Facebook you and Tariq broke up.

He made a memorial page for your relationship and everything.

Yeah, I asked him not to do that.

Um, but, yeah, I'm... I'm doing fine.

Just had to take a step back...

Oh, oh... sorry...

It's okay... from the relationship.

No, it's okay. Yeah.

Oh! Did you hear about Malik and Brandy's party tonight?

You going? I was invited,

but they were always more of Tariq's friends.

Oh, all right. Yeah.

Well, my girl Michelle

throwing a Halloween party tonight, too.

You should come through! Oh, no board games.

Thank you, um, but, you know,

I-I actually have plans already.

Okay. Yeah.

Cool.

Erika's super nice from what I remember,

but I just don't know her that well.

And I won't know anyone at that party.

And I really do have plans tonight.

I put up a camera to try to keep kids from egging my house,

and, as of this morning, it has not worked.

But maybe tonight.

- You busy, it's cool. - Yeah.

Whoa, whoa, Louis, hey! Baby Thanos!

No candy until the end of the day.

Oh, my bad.

I passed out the little candy bags we made,

but I'll take 'em back.

Okay.

But it's Halloween!

We should be able to have candy whenever we want!

Oh. Ooh.

That boy loves his candy.

Yeah, well, we try to wait until the end of the day

to pass out candy, you know?

Make sure the parents have to deal with the sugar rushes.

Oh, okay. And that's why I'm glad to be the aunt.

Thank you.

Oh, and can you give this to Gregory?

To Mr. Eddie? Mm-hmm.

Something special in it.

Oh, my God, drugs?

No.

Now that's a bad bitch.

- I know. Every morning. - She looks amazing.

- Even Mondays. - Does she take Pilates?

I don't know.

Hey, Ashley.

Got more candy for the stash.

I'm so bored.

This is hell.

'Kay.

Oh, hey, Ron Burgundy.

Oh, look at you... you shaved.

Look, I got this bag of candy from Joel and Carolina's mom.

She wanted me to give it to you.

Maybe she wants you to get a cavity or something.

Oh. That's nice of her, but no thanks.

I truly hate candy unless it's 96% cacao.

Uh, but you can hang on to that, and I'll tell her thank you.

Okay.

Well, thank you to your donation to my mouth.

Sorry, no.

Ooh, Werther's!

"Here's a little extra something sweet."

Am I going to steal this candy?

We shall see.

Okay. So, what did we learn?

Don't go to Salem. Or Boston.

You know what? Just skip the whole state.

Hey! Hey, hey, hey!

Guys, what has gotten into you today?

Gu... Come on.

They're really on one today.

Venus: Ava, could you please come out here?

- No. Stop right now. - I said have a seat.

Man: You know you're not supposed to be doing that.

What the...?

Witch!

No candy until the end of the day.

Enjoy the haunted house.

Hello?

Where's the candy that's supposed to be here?

Oh, hey. The candy's right...

Oh, dang.

Where'd the candy go?

Guys, what is going on?