Simon Says

Uh!

Ah.

Ah! Ah.

It's amazing.

So your fellow lives here?

Well, if I was you, I'd look after it.

You sure you don't want me to stay?

Ah, no, it's fine. Honestly.

Hello?

Hello?

Hello?

It won't work.

Oh, um, uh, sorry.

You almost gave me a heart attack.

My name's Dina.

- Dina? - Yeah.

Ah, sorry, I'm here to see Richard.

Richard?

Yeah. This is his place, right?

He invited me here for a weekend away.

That Richard?

Um, yeah.

It is.

- I can see from the look in your eye what you're thinking,

and you'd be right.

- You know him? - Clearly not that well.

He invited me to stay the weekend as well.

But he calls himself "Charles."

What the...?

I told you,

you won't get any signal in here.

Nearest town, hours away on foot.

- Yeah, well, that would give me plenty of time

to think about how stupid I've been.

- What? - It's obvious, isn't it?

He's been playing us both.

Obviously.

- So why spare the embarrassment? I can just leave and...

Oh, wait a minute.

He's gonna come back eventually,

so we can have some fun.

What?

Well, he's done it to us both, right?

Yeah. So what?

- Well, he obviously thought we were coming

on different weekends, so...

If he even lives here.

Hadn't even thought about that one.

So what's your suggestion?

We snoop around the place.

Then when he comes back, one of us hides,

the other one comes outta nowhere and bang, we got him.

Yeah, I might even video it,

upload it later for posterity.

I don't know.

- I don't know about you, but I'm pretty angry right now.

So a little revenge would be nice, don't you think?

I guess.

It's good enough for me.

Hey, you coming or what?

Play the game.

- Not even a spot of dust. This place is cleaned up.

Why wasn't he here?

- What? - I mean,

why wasn't he waiting?

Guilt.

When I arrived, the door was partially open.

God, I hope he owns this place.

Being catfished is one thing,

but being done for burglary.

You as well?

I think the sound's coming from that direction.

You know, if he's having a heart attack,

I might take it easy on him, might.

There's no one here.

- Well, at least we know he wasn't lying about this place.

- Don't know whether that's a good thing or not.

Right.

Now it's getting interesting.

Looks like Richard.

What do you know about this place?

- He said it's been in his family for generations.

I looked it up. I couldn't find much.

Mm, he told me the same.

So he's not lying completely.

Mm, to make a lie convincing,

you need to drop a few truths in it.

Oh, wait.

The plot thickens.

You've gotta be kidding me.

Great. That's just great.

We're just about ready to come up here

and give him a peace of our minds.

- Well, Tony, it looks like that isn't happening, is it?

- So he's not here? - Nope.

But we haven't checked all the rooms.

This place is a bit of a maze.

Perfect. Just perfect.

- Looks like our catfish swings both ways, though.

Maybe our catfish doesn't even exist.

- Well, I knew it was too good to be true, so.

Well that's why I think we need

to have ourselves a little revenge.

Revenge?

Hey, come in here.

- Oh my God. - What is this?

Great, first legitimate man,

he turns out to be a wannabe Bond villain.

- Is this some kind of secret camera thing?

Like a prank?

Screw this.

What are you doing?

Having a drink.

It might be poisoned.

Hmm. One can hope.

- Well, he did promise us dinner and a weekend away.

Oh, name tags.

Hmm.

Hmm.

I'm starved.

What?

Well, I have to admit,

this isn't the strangest date I've had.

Hmm. It isn't?

- Oh, come on. You can't just leave it there.

You have to tell us the full story.

I don't kiss and tell.

Oh, so it did go somewhere.

You really don't talk much, do you?

I just like listening.

She's been like that since we got here.

You know, you should really learn to roll with the punches.

So we're sure that this is beyond

a catfish thing, though, yeah?

Oh, yeah.

And he is not a serial killer.

Well, we don't know that yet.

Then why? Why are we here?

Yes. And where's our lovely host?

I think we all should leave.

- What? - Why?

Because none of this is right, is it?

- I'm interested to see where this is going.

- I have to admit, I'm with Dina on this one.

What do you think's gonna happen?

- I don't know, but if we all leave together...

I'm not going anywhere.

If you wanna leave, why don't you leave?

You seemed eager earlier.

And you convinced me to stay.

- That was before I realized how boring you are.

Cats got some claws.

What? You scared of he dark?

- Okay, come on. - What?

- Fine. - Hey, come back.

- You're no fun. - Oh.

Hey, Clara. Come on.

Why don't you stay? - No, it's fine.

This place is too weird for me.

- It's fine. She won't have much fun, anyway.

- It's locked. - What?

- It's locked. - Where's the key?

I never saw one earlier.

- Oh, decided to still grace us with her presence.

Quiet.

What? You've got some nerve.

I was pretty nice to you earlier

and now you're just gonna be rude?

- What are you doing? - The windows.

They're locked too.

Do all of you have a key?

What?

No, ah, a key, why?

The front door is locked.

Back door too.

What do you mean, "locked?"

- That's the opposite of unlocked, darling.

- Oh, shut up. - Is it one of you?

No.

You were here before us.

What did you do with his body?

Huh. That's not even funny.

- We need to check all the doors and windows.

You gotta be joking, right?

We need to check them.

She's right.

You're gonna hurt yourself.

I can't get it open.

Maybe it's reinforced.

It doesn't look it.

Maybe the quiet girl was right.

What was that?

Hmm. Ring and they will come.

You've got some nerve Charles?

Or is it Daniel?

What's in a name?

Catfishing is one thing,

but if you're gonna quote Shakespeare, I'm leaving right now

Then you won't understand why it is

that I brought you here.