Get Duked!

The Duke of Edinburgh Award.

An outdoor adventure challenge set up in 1956

to take young delinquents out of the city and into the countryside.

Established by the Queen's husband, the Duke of Edinburgh,

it centers on four days' camping in the great outdoors,

away from the perils and distractions of urban life.

By completing tasks such as teamwork,

foraging and orienteering,

you will receive not only a laminated certificate

but also the sense of pride that you are part

of the promising youth of tomorrow.

It's quite the challenge.

Four days on your own.

No phones.

Just your wits and nature.

I'm Mr. Carlyle,

your new substitute outdoor education teacher.

I'll be leading the award this year.

I promise you it'll be a life-changing experience.

I'm so glad your headmaster volunteered the three of you.

Right, get your bags.

Oh, my God.

Ah, smell that air.

It smells of cow shit.

Welcome. Lose yourself in the beats of DJ Beatroot!

Oy, yo, DJ Beatroot's PR campaign is kicking off nicely.

This is, like, literally grassroot marketing, untapped territory.

Right, guys? Guys?

DJ, shut up a sec.

Who are you?

Ian. Hello.

Where'd you come from?

Minibus. I got on just after you.

I said hello.

Quite a few times, actually.

What'd you do to get volunteered?

I really wanted to do the Duke of Edinburgh Award,

but I didn't have a group, so...

Why didn't you just do it with your friends?

Right. You three, stop hanging around.

Line up, boys.

Expedition start.

One, two, three, four bodies.

All healthy. Tick.

Okay, Duke of Edinburgh camping expedition roll call.

- Who have I got? - Dean Gibson, sir.

- Terribly disruptive. - Appalling attendance.

Banned from all local parks.

Burned down a school toilet.

Dean Gibson. Okay, and...

Duncan MacDonald.

- Allowed to run wild. - Undisciplined.

- Poor standard of hygiene. - Reckless. - Harebrained.

Claimed he was trying to light his sh...

- Okay, and... - DJ Beatroot.

Who?

DJ Beatroot.

Can I have your real name, please?

- That is my real name. - No, your original name.

Well, I mean, last week, I was MC DickFire.

"DickFire."

Uh, sir, it's just... Just that third one down there.

William DeBeauvoir.

- William DeBeauvoir. - Oh.

- Now introduce yourself to the class. - DJ Beatroot.

A very disappointing start to the year.

Filmed a hip-hop video in front of

the burning wreckage.

D-DJ Beatroot. Thanks.

- What did you tell him? - Told him to go fuck himself.

Nice.

Right, you've all met Ian.

Dear Mr. Carlyle, Ian is a sheltered and sensitive boy.

Placing him with like-minded, good Christian children.

A perfect environment for him where he can make friends and thrive.

Yours sincerely, Silvia Harris.

If I hear

you're ever anything other than incredibly nice to him,

- you'll fail the award. - What?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, sir, can't do that.

Well, actually, teamwork is a core element

of the Duke of Edinburgh Award, so he can.

Sir, come on.

Right. Get your bags.

- Come on, boys. - Oh, smell that air.

So, you excited about the expedition?

Aye. I'm gonna blast this.

I'm gonna run the whole way.

No. We didn't have a choice, mate.

'Cause Duncan burned down a toilet!

Hey, I was trying to light a shit.

Exactly, you knob head, and now we got to do this.

This is punishment? This?

They were gonna expel him, weren't they, so we all took the blame.

That's very loyal.

I wish they'd just expelled us. That'd have been amazing.

- Yeah, trust me, man. - This, though? Ugh.

Oh, best mates ever, these lads.

Mate, and the fire was amazing. I wish you'd seen it.

Yeah, he did make a shit explode.

Well, turns out they don't really burn,

so I had to use loads of lighter fluid,

which is kind of how it all...

Think of the stupidest plan you can, okay?

It's not gonna come close to Duncan's plan.

Uh, actually, it worked so well,

it burned the whole toilet block down,

so, uh, who's stupid here?

- Uh, you. - It's definitely still you.

It really is you, mate.

Hurry up, you lot.

Come on, come on.

Okay, boys. I'll meet you at the Bàs Valley campsite at 6:00 p.m.

You all set?

Just give us the postcode, sir.

Oh, you can put that away, you numpty.

There's no reception in the Highlands.

What?

- He's right. - Shit.

So, I mean, do we just go home then?

We can't do this without a map.

- Ian. - I was told that my-my group

- would have a planned route. - Take a breath, Ian.

Okay, this is the route you'll take.

It's really quite simple. So, initially,

follow the natural contours of the valley, towards the cliffs.

This is active farmland, so respect the County Code and avoid electric fences.

Once you reach the volcanic plug

by the old oak tree, watch your step.

Try not to run, as it can be very unstable around there.

Climbing the hill should bring you to the valley of the campsite,

where I'll be waiting with a campfire.

We'll spend the night singing some rousing, hearty songs.

Though very remote, there is a road by the camp, so be aware.

We don't want any car accidents.

Setting off the next morning, do stick to the path,

as the road has severe drops on all sides.

Travel through the woods. At all costs, avoid the ruined villages around here.

Very dangerous inside those walls,

and there'll be no one to come to your rescue out there.

Final stretch, you can forage for lunch before heading to the coast,

where we'll be reunited, and I'll award you as having passed.

To be honest, the whole thing is fraught with danger, really,

and I'm amazed they let teenagers do it, but there you go.

- All clear? - Huh?

Duke of Edinburgh Award, start.

- But, sir, no, you can't. - Sir!

- Come on. - Good luck.

You'll need it.

Oh, and don't get lost.

Every year, people go missing round here.

It's...

- Ah. - Oh.

- Oh, right, yeah. - Okay.

It's north.

Oh.

Watch out, man!

Okay, boys, let's just get far enough away from the teacher,

walk around in circles and cover ourselves in fucking mud.

They'll think we've done the award.

We'll sit down by a tree, just chill out.

Hey, yo, guys.

New kid, yo, wait up.

- That'll be mad. - Oh, shit. That looks good.

- It will be. It'll be fine. - That could work. That could work.

- Still got a map. - Yep.

Can make good time, achieve all the award goals. It'll be fine.

Oh, you've got to be kidding me enough. Yo, Duncan.

Give us a lift.

Oh, this is shit. Why'd you want to do it?

It looks good on your CV.

Gives you the extra edge in a job interview.

Yeah, well, I'm gonna be a hip-hop star,

so that's not really relevant.

Oh, yeah, good one. I-I could be a hip-hop star.

- What? No. - My parents are pretty keen for me to go into law,

so it looks good on the university application.

I could be a lawyer.

What university will you go for?

I'm gonna work in the factory with my brother and my dad.

Oh, aye. 6.50 an hour.

Seriously, 6.50 an hour for just packing fish.

Probably just do that.

Well, my family have a saying. It's, um,

"Work hard at what you love to do,

and all your dreams can come true."

Just did a gig here last week.

- Did you, actually? - Yeah.

Oh, no, better be better than the last one.

All this fresh air is horrible.

What?

Hurts my nose.

Oh, look, over there.

There he fucking is. DJ, hurry up!

Oh, yeah, you're all right 'cause you got shit shoes.

Look. We found something for you.

What the fuck are they?

Yeah, put them on instead.

Bub, I am not wearing fence shoes, man.

It doesn't matter. Look, you're taking forever. Just put them on.