Elvis from Outer Space

Okay then.

I'll tell you how I met Elvis.

It was when he came back from Alpha Centauri.

You see, he had been living there for the past 30 years

with friendly aliens.

He was almost dead when they got him.

So they transferred his energy, his essence,

into a bio-engineered body they'd built for him

called a biosuit.

He looked a little different

but he felt like he was 25 again.

At first he was happy,

they'd saved his life.

He saw what no other man had ever seen.

He knew the friendship of beings from another world

and he found new fans everywhere he went.

Turns out music really is the universal language.

So the universe loved Elvis, of course.

But as the years went by, he got more and more homesick.

Something was troubling him.

He took to singing the blues,

his heart was filled with pain.

The aliens were so empathetic they could hardly bear it

when he sang those sad songs.

So they decided to take him back home,

so maybe he could be happy again.

There was just one problem,

you see, the body they'd built for Elvis

had been grown in space,

in a low gravity environment.

The aliens didn't know how the cells would hold up on Earth.

I mean, you got your gravity,

atmospheric pressure, and whatnot,

out in space, they didn't have those kinda problems.

What they did know was that the skeleton

would start to collapse,

and the cells would age at an accelerated rate.

His organs would cease to function,

and his heart would stop beating.

If he didn't get back to the ship in time,

he would die.

But Elvis didn't care.

He was willing to take the chance,

he had to take the chance.

He's coming.

It cannot be stopped, he sends you this message.

Can you please help me find a woman named Linda?

Linda Beth Truman, born around 1960.

I don't have much time, so please,

please help me find Linda Truman.

It was 2007, out there on federal land.

The CIA picked him up...

Good evening, sir.

...somewhere south of Vegas.

Top secret stuff.

Only those with top level clearances

knew about the mission.

This group of agents was a special detail

organized by the CIA to escort and protect Elvis

while he was here on Earth.

Oh, yeah.

Kirby's in the car, they've picked up the guy

and they'll be here any minute.

Yes sir.

Why they wanna do this

in the middle of the damn night's beyond me.

I'm getting too old for this.

When they said "Vegas,"

this is not what I was expecting.

Hey, Kirby, I'm putting the president's office through

to Agent Messina on a secure line.

Agent Messina was a rookie,

but she was the expert on Elvis Presley.

Yes, sir?

Yes, Mr. President, he's right here.

He's ready to rock.

Yes, he's ready to rock-n-roll.

Um...

Yes, I understand, Mr. President.

We'll do it, sir.

Hello, sir.

Just wanted to say that I'm proud of what you're doing

for our Roswell project.

We look forward to your continued cooperation.

I wanted to tell ya that I am a big fan

and so are my daughters.

Thank you, Mr. President. Thank you very much.

Mr. Burrows, as you know,

we are in communication with your friends.

Why did you come back?

We had an agreement,

and we thought you were happy up there.

We made clear that

this is most uncomfortable for us.

We want you to take him back.

We will not.

And why not?

It is his wish to see his child.

To hell with his wishes!

They were supposed to be going to Vegas,

but they drove right through.

Elvis started to feel a little uneasy.

Has the Linda meeting been set up?

Not yet, the chief will explain that to you.

It was a simple little building,

way off the road, you'd barely notice it,

but it had levels that went deep underground,

some people say like 15 floors down.

Deep into the bedrock of the mountains.

They say government scientists had alien bodies down there

and they did experiments.

When Area 51 closed down, the government just moved

all of that stuff out there and called it Area 52.

I'm all the way down here on level 10.

This place gives me the creeps.

And don't even talk about what's in those labs.

I thought I saw a head in a cabinet the other day.

We can't just let you wander around freely.

I'm afraid you'll be considered under house arrest

until further notice.

Wait a minute, this is not part of the mission.

We're supposed to simply communicate.

We have orders, Messina,

orders which you are not privy to.

Now stay out of this,

and don't ever question me again.

Is that clear?

Now she was in over her head,

but, she had a job to do, and she was gonna do it.

Now, the guys at the top had bigger problems.

Do you know they sent in the freakin' Chairman?

What?

Now, what in the hell could be going on out here

in the middle of nowhere

that they need to send in the damn Chairman?

He's upstairs, I gotta go.

Our little friends at Roswell

are full of some pretty neat tricks.

True, but we've known that for some time.

Of course, the aliens knew all about Area 52.

They'd gone there long ago to see what the CIA was up to.

They'd gone over every inch of that place,

and had cameras everywhere.

So, what now, sir, we just keep him here forever?

No, no, no.

I tell you what, we phone home,

we tell our friends we wanna return the package ASAP.

All right, you heard the man,

let's get back to work.

The other agents closed ranks.

Messina felt the chill.

His presence here is potentially disastrous!

He is entitled to some time on his own.

He was never a prisoner.

I believe your people call it a karmic imperative.

Karmic imperative?

He needed some time at home.

Damn this thing!

I hate supercilious aliens from Alpha Centauri.

There's just something about them.

What now, sir?

Well, we keep him confined until further notice,

we don't have any choice.

Baba Duece!

Probably break the safe, man.

Give it up for JJ Fatmac

so big they call him Falvis

Right to the balls then, huh?

Tompkins, please admit the lovely Agent Messina.

- Yes, sir. - She's cleared to deliver lunch.

Hungry?

Is there anything you need?

Yes, sir, all set.

Monitor the cell at all times, do not leave my post,

and notify you of any status changes ASAP, sir.

But as it turned out,

Agent Messina had some friends of her own.

Untraceable, invisible,

and highly reliable friends.

Well, how's my favorite secret agent?

Hi, Folger, long time no speak.

Listen, I need a favor from you.

Kiddo,

you saved my life back in that Pakistan nightmare.

I still owe you big time.

Have you heard of Project King: Memphis Rising?

Well, I'm a part of it, sort of.

I'm not in the loop.

Messina, my dear, if there was something called

Project King: Memphis Rising, I'd know about it.

Would you?

Two Irishmen are walking past a pub in Dublin,

it could happen, you know?

Huh?

Oh, god.

I'm sick.

Something is happening.

Somebody, somebody, help me.

Tompkins, check on him, something's wrong.

Yes, sir.