Albert

*

- [humming "O Christmas Tree"]

*

*

*

All right.

The coast is officially clear.

Freedom!

This girl's got some roots to stretch!

Mmm!

- Get some water, get some fertilizer.

Now's your chance, folks!

Mmm...

- Aah! - Whoa! Oof!

Larry? Larry?

Has anyone seen my pet ladybug?

No...

- Guys, guys! I've grown a flower.

- Whoa! - Ooh!

That's just glued on.

You can't glue on a flower.

You can glue everything.

Look! I glued eyes to my butt.

- Everyone stay close to your pot spots!

Don't wander too far.

- Too late, Boo! Ha ha ha! Tag! You're it!

- Can't a bonsai get some sleep around here?

Can't catch me!

Whoa! Whoa! Oof!

Gotcha!

Uh-oh...

- Hey! - Go back to your side!

Can we share it?

- Whoa! - Oh!

- Oh... - I knew it.

- Look! Winter's coming! Herman lost another leaf.

- That means it's almost Christmas!

Shh! Don't say--

- Um, did somebody say Christmas?!

- Ah, yes! Sing for us, Albert!

Me? Sing?

Oh, I don't know if I can...

Albert! Albert!

- Albert! Albert! Albert! - Ha ha, come on, Albert.

- Who's ready to get their jingle on?

Sing it, Albert!

- I'm ready! I'm ready! JINGLE ME!

Ahhh, here we go...

- * I admit that when it comes to Christmas *

* I can get a little extreme

* It's been a year of waiting, so I'll start decorating *

- * The morning after Halloween *

* Bring on the red and green

* Come on, sing those carols and chime those chimes *

* I'm ready, so let's do this *

* Trim the trees, let's start with me *

* For the Christmassy-est Christmas *

* So come on, everyone, let's get our jingle on *

* And cover every square inch with lights *

* Hang all the bling we've got *

Right there. Ooh, you missed a spot.

- And turn up the "Silent Nights"!

- That's not too much, right? Ha ha ha ha!

* Ring those bells and light those lights *

* I'm ready, so let's do this *

* If it's up to me, this one will be *

* The Christmassy-est

all: * Christmassy-est

* Christmassy-est

- * Christmas!

Nailed it.

Eeew, Lola's got a weed!

Ahhh!

- She's got a weed. Maybe I've got a flower.

Ever think of that? Weedist.

Oof!

Aah!

- Ooh! - Eew!

- Ugh! Try cleaning your butt yard once in a while, Gramps.

Off my lawn!

- Owww! - Oh! Get outta here, jerkweed!

The name is Geeeen--

Oof!

- Be nice. It's Christmastime!

Goodwill towards all, remember?

- So warm and moist. Ahh...

Ooh-whee!

Uh, 'scuse me, guys,

I don't wanna disturb you or anything,

but there's fresh Christmas trees on the lot!

- Oh! - Ah!

- Get outta my way! - I wanna take a gander!

- Calm down. Come on. Everybody'll get to see 'em.

- Check out that bark! - Oh ho ho ho ho!

- Check out those stems! - It's me and the spirit!

- Hubba-hubba! - They're big!

That's some serious plants!

- Hey. Why are you so blue Christmas?

- Those trees outside--

someone's gonna take them home,

make 'em all twinkly and shiny.

And right on top will go a big, bright star.

Why not me?

- Uh, guys, I don't wanna alarm you or anything,

but Earth Mama's comin' back!

Get back to your pot spots--

pronto! - Ohh!

- How did you get down here and all gussied up?

- Is that your Christmas tree, Grandma?

- This pipsqueak? Ha ha ha!

He's not ready yet.

- Ya got the delivery for Baker's Hill, Ma?

- It's in the back. We just need to load the truck.

Sweetie, do Grandma a favor and take off all those ornaments.

*

- Lots of people think I'm a pipsqueak too.

*

Awesome!

But my dad always says it's okay to be small,

as long as it doesn't stop you from doing big things.

And she's gone!

- Aah! I'm so glad she plugged you in!

Oh, you look so nice all plugged in!

I do, don't I?

Aw, no.

Ugh!

Delicious bamboo...

is the panda's favorite food.

- Aah! Turn it off, turn it off!

Yeah.

- Not in front of the children!

Aw, man!

So the search is on

for the world-famous Empire City Christmas tree.

I'm here with tree expert Horton Farber.

Now, professor...

what makes the perfect Christmas tree?

- Ha ha. Right. Robust branches

are a must for any Christmas tree,

the better to hold those ornaments and lights.

Some delight at the aroma of a tree,

or "nature's perfume"...

- - As I like to call it.

But the truly perfect Empire City Tree

that captures our hearts and imaginations,

it radiates all the beauty and wonder and joy that--

I'm sorry.

That is Christmas.

- Albert! Everything he said--

that's you!

- I can be that tree!

Yes!

- Ha ha ha! You? - Why not me?

- Tomorrow, I'll be joining Professor Farber

at Baker's Hill, Vermont,

where he will select this year's Empire City Tree.

- All right, plants! Baker's Hill!

We need coordinates!

- We're here, and Baker's Hill is there.

I'd say it's about 3 inches.

That's so close!

- Ugh. What are they putting in your mulch?

- Wait, now hold on, hold on, hold on.

You're leaving us, Albert?

Albert, we--we love you.

- I will never forget you guys.

- Again, I don't wanna alarm anybody,

but Albert, your ride's leavin'!

- - You'll be sorry!

- No. I'll be a Christmas tree!

all: Go, go, go!

No, no, no!

- What the dingus is goin' on here?

Oops!

- Go, Albert. Follow your dreams!

Ha ha ha ha!

It's gonna be a very peaceful Christmas this year.

Ooh!

*

Whaa--

Albert! -

Albert!

Maisie!