Bob Hearts Abishola

Previously on Bob Hearts Abishola...

- The food is delicious. - Mmm.

Yes, very good.

They put on a nice wedding here, too.

Are you thinking of one couple in particular?

A mother can dream, right?

- So can aunties. - Aw...

So what's the first step?

Abishola needs to finalize her divorce in Nigeria.

And they'll need to start looking

into neighborhood schools for Dele.

And I'll have my lawyer draw up a prenup.

What?

Well, it's just this thing you sign

to make sure everybody hangs on to what's theirs.

We know what it is.

But why does Abishola need one?

Do you think she wants Bob's money?

No, but it's a family business,

and it needs to stay in the family.

But wouldn't Abishola be a part of the family?

Well, yeah.

Sorta.

Do you remember a moment ago, you asked us to tell you

when you are being offensive?

It's happening now.

_

Dele, get the door. Tunde, move it.

Kaale.

Kaale, Bob.

My mother will be right out.

Great. Where's your auntie and uncle?

Hiding. They don't want to talk to you

because you are the son of a monster.

Hey, you don't get to pick your mom.

All right.

So how's it going with you? How's school?

Fine.

Your mom says they're moving you up

to an Advanced Placement math class.

- They are. - That's exciting.

Yes.

You're not really selling the excitement.

I'm sorry.

I'm just gonna grab some water.

Thank you, Tunde.

You're welcome, Bob.

You gonna come out?

AUNTIE OLU (WHISPERS): Tell him no.

No.

Okay.

Would you like an ice cube?

No ice cubes for him.

Oh. N-Never mind.

Ready?

Wow. You look great.

Hang on.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

They're a fun couple.

_

- To us. - To us.

It was so nice to see Dele tonight.

He's a good kid.

Yes, he is. Thank you.

He's a bit of a Glum Gus, though, isn't he?

Glum Gus?

Oh, you know, he's not a big smiler or laugher,

anything pleasant.

My son is a very happy boy.

I'm sure he is.

He just seems like he's under a lot of pressure.

If you mean the pressure to succeed, then yes.

That's cool. Just keep an eye on the shower drain

in case his hair starts falling out.

Dele is fine.

I didn't say that he wasn't.

He is ambitious, hardworking and focused.

And a little sad.

You know they make the Caesar salad right at the table?

It's quite a show.

You have no business telling me about my son.

I didn't mean anything by it.

He just seems so serious for a kid his age.

- Eh? And what's wrong with being serious? - Nothing.

And let's let that be the end of it

and the beginning of a nice dinner.

Well, we know who Dele gets the serious thing from.

Boy, if looks could kill, I'd be...

: All right.

HOST (OVER TV): You know how our game is played.

Yes, I watch...

- You are home early. - Where is Dele?

I-In his room.

Poor Dele.

Are you unhappy?

Excuse me?

"Excuse me?" Are you a Glum Gus?

- Am I putting too much pressure on you? - No.

Good. Then you need to smile more.

- Why? - This is America.

We have to look happy, even if we're not.

- Okay. - But you are happy?

- Yes. - If something was wrong,

you would tell me?

- Yes. - Good.

Because if you did not, you would be in big trouble.

Let me see you smile.

You need to work on that.

_

MAN (OVER TV): Hi, nice to meet you.

Hello. How are you?

I'm good. How's tonight?

- Douglas? - Yeah?

Come over and sit next to me, honey.

Okay. (GRUNTS)

- Knock it off! - Aah!

Hey.

You're home early.

Yeah.

- Everything okay? - Not really. Anything to eat in here?

I thought you went out to dinner.

Yeah, I thought so, too.

You want to talk about it?

Nope.

Grapes.

Good choice.

Oh. Sit here.

Watch her right hand. It's still got some snap.

So, tell me.

Oh, everything was fine.

I was talking about how great her son is.

- I made one little critique and... - Stop.

- What? - You're wrong.

I didn't tell you what I said.

It doesn't matter what you said.

No single mother wants to hear

her child be criticized by some random guy.

I'm not random.

In the eyes of God, you are.

We all are.

Okay, that was random.

A-And what I said was true.

Her kid's depressed. She refuses to see it.

Douglas? Tell him.

Rule number one for dating single moms:

never give parenting advice.

I mean, never.

Even if the little guy's in the basement

making a suit out of human skin, you keep your mouth shut.

And yet you kept seeing his mother.

I'm going to sleep.

Sweet dreams, sad man.

Geez, I don't even know I'm doing it.

Well, now you know!

_

Sounds like he's just trying to help.

Hey, I don't need his help. My son is fine.

Straight A's and an honor student.

And that's all that matters.

What mother would not choose a smart, sad child

over a happy, dumb one?

He is not sad.

Are you sure?

'Cause every time I see him...

He is not sad.

And why would he be?

Ah, Chukwuemeka.

The bee wants more honey.

What?

He texts me all day long.

Loves the emojis. Look.

I miss you, Kemi.

Man,

you really did a number on his head.

I did a lot of things on his head.

I don't understand. Do you like him or not?

I like that he likes me.

Ugh. Kemi, that is not enough.

Hmm. Maybe I misspoke.

When I said "he likes me," I meant he worships me.

Oh, come on.

Kemi, I worship you.

The only problem we have is his mother.

She disapproves of me,

so I have no choice but to keep seeing him.

Shouldn't you respect her opinion?

I do respect it. That's why I wait till after she's asleep

before I sneak into his apartment

and let him worship my brains out.

So you can't be making no noise.

No. And it's not easy.

At the moment of truth, I have a tendency to squeak.

Oluwa mi o.

Now, when you say "squeak," you mean like a dolphin

or like a mouse?

More like a leaky balloon.

_

You wanted to see us, Mr. Wheeler?

Yeah, guys, come on in, sit.