Psych

Shawn, what in blue blazes is going on?

You're up on the roof in this weather?

Nothing, dad.

Me and Gus were just practicing base jumping.

It's the newest thing in extreme sports.

Are you crazy?

You could get yourself seriously hurt

Or maybe even killed doing something like this.

Don't worry, dad.

We made life-size replicas of ourselves

To make sure the chutes would work.

Mine's over there.

We've made improvements since then.

Base jumping.

Shawn, there's no way I'm gonna let you

Do something that risky.

But, dad?

But nothing.

As long as you live in my house

You follow my rules.

Now, I want you to clean this stuff up,

Come inside, and do your homework.

Gus, come on.

You're smarter than this.

Well, one day I won't be living in your house.

Then I'll be able to take any risk I want.

What about that?

Okay.

When you and Gus are 30 years old

You can go out and be as wild and reckless as you want.

Best idea * ever *

People say our intense love of bunnies

Is creepy at our age, but history will prove them

To be heartless bastards.

I can't believe the French actually eat these little guys.

The French aren't the only ones.

What?

No, I wasn't counting other rabbits.

Rabbits don't eat each other, Shawn.

- Most rabbits, yes. - No, pretty much all.

You know what, this conversation

Will only end badly.

The thing is...

I have something big to tell you.

You know you can say anything to me, Gus.

We've known each other forever and there is absolutely nothing

That could dent our impenetrable bond.

I have a secret girlfriend.

- You're dead to me. - Shawn?

I can't believe you.

You brought me all the way down here

To get hopped up on bunny love

So you could spring this on me and I wouldn't make a scene.

- Yeah, pretty much. - Well, it's working.

Good.

I don't even remember what this whole thing was about.

God, this bunny is strong.

Must be Columbian.

Her name is Ruby.

I met her at Bevmo! And she's in marketing.

And I think she's really, really cool.

How do you know this chick

Isn't just trying to take you to the cleaners?

Well, one, all my cash is tied up in dress shirts

And decorative pillowcases.

Fair.

Why are you waiting till just now to tell me about her?

Because I wanted to make sure that what we had

Was real and solid.

And I didn't want you screwing things up for me.

Your decision to not let me scope her out in advance

Could have repercussions for years to come.

Shawn, the thing is, you have a tendency

To scare my girlfriends away.

Why, because I ask a few simple questions?

You asked one girl if she knew the answer

To the riddle of the Sphinx.

And bullet dodged. You're very welcome.

i>- You only knew that because you saw it on super friends.

She had the same opportunity to see that episode, Gus.

All right, you.

What are you doing?

Pick that bunny back up.

I will not be easily swayed or impressed

By the effects of an intense adorability high.

As far as I'm concerned she's starting here.

Fine.

- And she's gotta get to here. - Okay.

It's not gonna be easy.

When do I meet her? In about three seconds.

Three seconds...

Hi, handsome.

Right back at ya.

She was talking to me, Shawn.

Ruby, this is Shawn.

- Hi. - Hello.

It's so good to meet you.

I'm sorry I ran late. My last appointment ran long.

She volunteers at the wildlife rescue.

Yeah, we were just cleaning up the ducks

That got caught up in the oil spill.

Wait a minute.

That sounded a little rehearsed.

Did he give you that?

Shawn, you are as kooky as Gus advertised.

Although, you, mister,

Did not do justice to that hair.

My god, most guys I know would kill for that mane.

Some have.

Aw, well, not me.

I like Gus's head.

It would be a crime to cover this up.

Yeah.

Got some questions for you Rubes.

Okay, shoot. Anything.

- Anything? - Shawn.

- Yeah. - Oh, good.

Favorite color. - Black.

- Liar. - Prove it.

- Favorite flavor. - Of what?

Everything.

- Mango. - Too easy.

- Anything else? - Favorite...

Magnum, P.I. episode.

i>- Did you see the sunrise?

Second favorite episode.

i>- Did you see The Sunrise: Part two?

Wow.

Actually, uh, reverse those two.

Yeah.

My god, who are you?

Well, it was good to meet you, Shawn.

It was good to meet you, Rubes.

You've exceeded all expectations.

Oh, thank you.

And might I say that you and Gus have

One of the most rich and fulfilling friendships

That I've ever seen.

We're like andie and duckie

With just a Tad of Mary Kate and Ashley.

Well, aren't we glad that that's over?

Yes, we are.

I guess all that's left now

Is for me to meet your friends.

You mean, for me to meet her friends.

No, I'm pretty sure I had it right the first time.

Okay, we can change it to we.

When do we get to meet your friends?

Uh...

I'm free now.

Ten minutes from now.

Roughly, an hour from now.

Pretty much anytime between now and tonight.

Shawn, that's a little short notice.

I would love to,

But I have this thing planned today.

We would love to come.

Okay, normally I would say great--

Seriously--but we're meeting at Berman's bend

Down by the river and we only have so many supplies.

Not enough supplies.

All right, we'll put something on the books

For next week.

Okay, good. Thank you.

Sounds good, sounds good. Bye.

You know that's right.

I can't believe we're crashing their picnic.

You asked me to vet this woman.

No, I didn't.

Regardless, when I vet someone

I vet until there is no vetting left to vet.

That is how I vet, Gus.

Ruby passed your test.

Of course she was good at the pet store.

She was prepared.

Gotta catch her and her friends unaware

Before they have a chance to get their story straight.

I like this woman, Shawn

I don't want you to mess it up for me.

Dude, deep down, you want this to happen.

You want me to do this

So that you can avoid another Mira situation.

Or have you already forgotten the woman you married

After only knowing for two days?

Ruby is not Mira.

And I don't need you to tell me

Whether a woman is right for me.

You sure about that?

Almost. 90%.

- Dude. - Fine, 81%.

Then let the vetting continue.

Gus.

Ruby, I'm sorry we're dropping in.

Yeah, but we agreed to do this next week.

We don't have enough supplies for two more people.

Which is why we brought our own gruyere.

Uh, no, I think you wanted to catch me off guard

To see what I was like with my friends,

Didn't you?

Yeah, that's what I thought. Okay.