Enlightened

This feels so cool.

Getting to feel like this together. It's been so long. What do you expect.

What are you doing?

I'm gonna bump.

Oh, fuck!

- Oh my god! - Aw!

I need to talk to you.

I'm not doing so good these days.

I just need some *

I know who can help.

I called * and they have a place for him.

I don't see how anyone can help him.

Shh! Ginger, quiet. You be quiet now.

All right.

What are you doing?

Are you trying to read my mail?

Wha... it's from Levi.

I see that.

Read it to me.

Right. Because you're so supportive?

Well, I mean, come on, Amy.

It's from Hawaii.

You're gonna want me to read it sooner or later.

I want to know. Did you finally get him there, what?

Yeah, Mom, he's there, OK?

Well, read it to me, please.

It's personal, OK?

LEVI, VOICE-OVER: Amy, well, I made it here barely.

They took away my phone,

so I have to write this shit out.

Can't remember the last time I wrote a letter.

First couple days were brutal.

My heart rate was fucking skyrocketing,

and the way everyone was talking so quiet and sympathetic

made me really want to drink...

or kill myself.

I've calmed down, but I'm not feeling at all.

It's like I'm in a Hawaiian prison.

Honestly, I can't believe you fell for this shit.

The philosophy is just so cheesy.

I may be desperate,

but I can't fall for just anything.

They want me to look at my dreams.

My dreams are chaos.

They want me to look at the past.

The past is a junkyard,

everything dead, rusted, and broken.

They say to live in the moment.

So all's I ever do is eat.

LEVI, VOICE-OVER: Well...

what if the moment is endless

and it's headaches and phlegm and farts

and whiners whining about every fucking thing...

In that moment...

that ever happened to them.

I realized he was never gonna come back.

These people are just so pathetic.

And even though I had these kids,

you know, these beautiful... these kids...

I can't look them in the face

when they talk about God...

It just wasn't enough.

and a higher power and the presence of grace.

You're OK.

We're animals, Amy,

and some animals like to party.

For me, God is a beer on the beach.

Maybe that's fucked up, but at least it's honest.

It's not wishful thinking.

I went snorkeling yesterday.

I wanted to find the turtle you told me about.

There was no turtle,

just a bunch of garbage at the bottom of the ocean.

One of the locals told me the bay here

has been polluted by all the boats.

I got to hit it.

All the turtles have gone or died.

Anyway, your turtle, if it ever existed, is gone.

At least I can't find it.

It's all I got.

I guess we'll see.

Counting the days, Levi.

What'd he say?

Oh, stuff, you know? I don't know.

Is he getting better?

Yeah. You know, it's a long road, right?

Is that all?

What else?

Nothing else.

He's there, and he's getting help, right?

That's all that matters.

Amy...

all the treatment centers in the whole world,

they can't help somebody unless that somebody really wants to get help.

You got to let him go.

Mom!

Oh, man.

Ohh! Heh heh. Wow.

Ha ha ha. I, uh, just finally... wow!

Oh, I feel a lot better now.

No wonder my back ached, you know what I mean?

That was, like, a week's worth there.

Thank God, thank God, you know?

It's really all I've been able to think about

the past 3 days.

Yeah? Well, it's all I can think about for the last 3 days

because you won't shut up about it, man.

Am I gonna have to hear about every shit you take

for the next couple weeks, huh?

Because if I am, I'm gonna out there and fucking drown myself, OK?

It's disgusting, man.

Makes me want to fucking puke.

Have some fucking dignity, man!

I'm sorry, man. I'm sorry.

Fucking...

Fucking air.

Fucking... not gonna have this shit.

I knew it was me just alone,

that I had to take care of myself.

I mean, she resented me.

Maybe she hated me.

Is there something you want to say, Travis?

Ohh. No, no.

Levi?

Ahem.

You have something to say?

No. I didn't say anything.

But you want to say something.

No.

It's important we all share here.

Yeah? Why's that?

Because when you share, you not only heal yourself,

but you help others.

Do you feel judged?

No. I don't feel judged.

I just don't feel like telling you about it.

And to be honest, I think that you're full of shit.

Ooh.

Ha ha! OK. Mm-hmm.

Good. Good, Levi.

No. You know what?

Good for you.

That bitch needs to be called out.

I fucking hate her.

You know, she called me into her office yesterday

to tell me that I was sexualizing the group.

Yeah. Like, the outfits that I wear

are too provocative or something.

You give dudes boners, Dani. Heh.

Whatever.

Face it. Look at those.

What, am I supposed to wear a fucking nun's habit in Hawaii?

No. Fuck her.

Come on. Should we tell him?

Come on.

Hey, Levi.

Tonight after dinner, we're gonna meet here,

and then we're gonna go down to whatever that hotel is down the beach,

do a little partying.

Um, and guess what.

I keistered in party favors for everybody.

Yeah. For everybody.

You guys are crazy.

You want to come with?

It's tempting, but nah.

Eh, but nothing. Ha ha!

Come on. You know you want to come with us.

You know, I'm trying to behave.

Dude, let go, let God.

No. I appreciate the invite.

I'm just... I'm gonna pass.

Why are you even here, Levi?

I-I don't know.

I mean, me, I'm just trying to get my head straight,

I'm trying to make a few changes.

I'd like to start eating healthy,

I'd like to start exercising,

and I would like to take a break from the drinking.

Why do you think you use?

Because my mom died, my dad's a dick,

the things I thought I should get, I didn't get them,

and I'm pissed.

Why not talk about that in group?

Because I can't stand Patricia's face, man.

I hate her fucking face!

And even if I did tell her,

she probably wouldn't get it, you know,

and I hate the jargon.

I'm sick of my room.

Tony is a fucking pig, man,

and I really need a new iPod.

I busted my iPod, and I am having a hard time, Jonah.

Sounds like you have a lot of frustrations.

Heh. You think?

Levi, this takes time.

Man, just...

These feelings that you're having, they're valid,

but you need to express them here

and in group.