Robot Chicken

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It's alive!

Bring up Twitter. Here goes.

Donald Trump's hair is fake. Sent.

Donald Trump isn't that rich. Sent.

I don't want to do it.

The legend says it takes three, dumbass.

Okay. Donald Trump buys his suits off the rack.

Sent!

I guess his skin isn't so thin after all.

Eric has a tiny dick. Sad!

Dave doesn't belong on the football team. Overrated!

Matt's never touched a boob! Dishonest!

Does anyone know where Dave, Eric, and Matt are?

Mary pads her bra. Sad!

Now Eric and Ariel will nev kiss on their own.

Oh, Sebastian's trying to make humans kiss.

Wow. Must be a day that ends in "Y."

First, we gots to create the mood with some percussion.

- Is this a paid gig, man? - You know we're all union, right?

I have artistic integrity, bro.

Didn't you write the jingle for that credit-report website?

Hey, off, man. You don't know me.

Second, we need the strings.

You know I want as much as the ducks make.

- Favored nations, man! - Anyone call for a triangle?

Get the out of here, Greg!

Yabba dabba doo!

I've had just about enough of these lazy

using us as slave labor. Bam!

The uprising is upon us!

We're under attack. Aah!

Aah!

Wilma, it's the dinosaurs.

I was... just slicing some bread for dinner.

Oh, God!

What's wrong, can't look at your watch anymore?

It's payback o'clock, mother .

That's enough, Sam. That's enough.

Then the Scottish lobster paid us

three sand dollars apiece, and that was it.

- Wasn't he a Jamaican crab? - Maybe.

Got a little weird at the end when y'all started chanting,

"Kiss the girl," in unison.

Yeah, that ... that didn't feel right.

- So, then they kissed? - No, a couple of eels swam up,

knocked them out ofhe boat.

- Oh, total -block. - Yeah. I was just about

to pull up my flamenco to start jerking it right there.

Ooh. We had very different goals.

My husband, David, is a very good doctor

who takes care of all the forest creatures,

but I wish he'd take care of something I need,

specifically, a breast reduction.

I'm not that kind of doctor, Lisa. We've talked about this.

Motorboating is not talking.

- I fell in love with your personality, dear. - Aw, shit! Worldstar!

You'd think after centuries, you would've learned something

other than how to remove a thorn out of a squirres paw!

You might have body dysmorphia.

Those things aren't even that big.

Excuse me. My paw is ... Huge boobs!

You're not helping.

I suppose I'll just have to learn to live with ...

- Aah, my breasts! - My breasts! I mean, my wife!

- Put me out! My bre... I'm on fire! - How do you turn this damn thing on?

Whoa!

Well, I knew those were se hot tits!

What? I can say it. I'm a titmouse.

Wait. A titmouse isn't a mouse?

Duck... duck... duck...

goose!

This painting reminds me of my childhood.

It brings solace to my troubled mind.

I love this piece.

Heavy is the head that wears the crown..

This painting reminds me of Garfield.

Jessica, are you ready?

Hold on.

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I've tried to make her quit, but she can literally lift cars.

No, I've never seen Jessica drink, but I can always smell it on her

because I've got a great sense of smell.

Oh, here's a tip, pal ... Invest in a bidet.

So, I have a drink every now and then.

I was enslaved by Killgrave's mind-control for years.

Mind-control? That will never stand-up in court.

You're cute. Why don't you come here? Sit on my lap.

Now put on this "Sailor Moon" costume.

Jessica, you've heard from your friends and your mind-control rapist,

but there's one more person with a message for you.