Journey Bombay to Goa: Laughter Unlimited (Bombay to Goa)

"Earned half a dime, "

"spent a dime"

"how will it keep..."

"the wheels of life spinning"

"earned half a dime, spent a dime"

"how will it keep the wheels of life spinning..."

"on the road to your destination?"

"Bombay to goa"

"open up, laugh, and sing, "

"enjoy life"

"dreams of a fantasy ride..."

"hold in your eyes"

"what's the problem?"

"Bombay to goa"

what are you doing? Why are you driving so rash?

What are you doing? Is this how you drive?

Left... take care of the left

will you get me killed?

Drive straight

why are you looking behind? Look ahead

what happened?

Your mother... - what did you say?

I mean, your mother's and my mother's horoscopes match...

no wonder we can't get along. You get it?

Am i blind?

Should i ram into the rickshaw? Want me to run over the pedestrians?

Here's what you do...

i'll sit here in your place

you sit there, in my place. Drive

seth hingorani will drive?

And you'll sit behind like the boss? How dare you?

Just you come home, i'll fix you

you can settle the account later

there goes your damn job ...pick it up

listen... listen...

listen to me

i can't drive

you should've thought about it earlier

how could you mess with a chauffeur? - Mr chauffeur...

i care a damn

d asa ex- best bus driver

world famous teligali, andheri cultural club talent hunt contest

hello? Hi. I'm lal and i want dough

during ganpatis installations, people go seeking (chanda) donations

let's see the difficulties they face

this mean man opens the door, "what ya want?"

I want chanda (donation). - I see

chanda, my child... go with him

oh no... i don't want your daughter, i want donations

last time too you came asking! - That was donations for govinda

is this time for chunkey pandey? Get out from here

the boys then went to a bhaiyaji

bhaiyaji said, i can't give you donations

you guys are frauds. Last time you took 501 bucks from me...

and told me you'd sit up ganpati. - Right

i saw for all the ten days, ganpati was always standing. You are frauds

lal singh wannabe tycoon

dasa, i'm elated tonight

i can see that

a little dough makes you go off your rockers, eh?

Until yesterday i was brother-in-law, now you take my name, eh!

I'm sorry, i'm sorry...

tell me...

what will you do with 200,000

it's planned. Who's reliance's boss?

It's anil. - Shall i make him my partner?

I'll setup a snacks shop. Reliance snacks centre

his hardwork, my money

check this one out. - Out of here!

The louse dares to sleep amongst the rich...

when no one dares to sit with me. Bloody poor

you got 200,000, right? - Right

so why share it with anil? - Then?

We'll setup our own shopping mall. - Where's the plot?

Here's the plot... all over here

this place? - Of course

ass! This land belongs to the government

the government belongs to us. Who are the voters?

Go ahead with the idea, i'll talk to the government

you mean,

my shopping mall building will really come up!

Yes. Lots of shops in it. - Correct

jewellery shop at the front, - yes

then the tobacconist, - okay

sportswear, - okay

and the electronics shop at the end. - Right. Plasma tv

there's the hitch. - What hitch?

Our neighbour, the thief chandu. - Oh yes

constables from eleven countries are looking for him

he's carried out 24 "attempts" of thefts successfully

when he met me yesterday he said he's going to celebrate silver jubilee

i'll ram this bottle on his head! - I won't let him succeed

get up, you! - No, i didn't steal!

I didn't steal the tv. - We didn't ask you!

How did you know what we came for? Hit the swine

you will steal plasma tv, eh?

Please! Where was the plasma?

In the shop. - Where's the shop?

Inside the shopping mall? - Where's the shopping mall?

Damn you! On the ground

ground? The ground is empty. Nothing is there

correct

brother, sorry

lala, i got another idea

chor bazaar (mumbal)

Where are you? I'm right there

if only you take the phone off the ear. Street 4, chor bazaar. Right from here

salaam aleikom, hanif bhai. - Waleikom. What's up?

Lal. Mr lal. M. D and chairman of a1 tours and travels

i've even printed the cards. Look

sir, i want to make a bus that is air-conditioned,

with all the facilities, passengers should be happy,

right kind of windows, seats... i want to build a palace on wheels

got the money? - Money's no problem. Cash

but i want... please count it...

i want you to give me parts that'll make my passengers praise my bus

god,

since we met by chance, i thought i'd share my feelings in person

because of flop film heroes and hit tv serial producers,

meeting you has become tough. The queue up everywhere

oh no, i won't tell you like a filmstar...

"you will be really happy"

no way

i won't even speak like rajesh khanna, god, don't give anyone a mouth

if you give him a mouth, don't give him a stomach. If you give him a stomach...

i won't say anything like that. I'll just say what adnan sami does

you have given even to the fools and the idiots

i mean, to people like shahid kapur you've given kareena kapoor

i don't want kareena kapoor. I want my career

that reminds me... dasa, - yes?

You haven't shown me the bus. - The bus isn't here as yet

the bus is perfect, the conductor ought to be right

the conductor is also perfect

and god willing if i get good passengers,

the journey will be fun

i don't know

speak up! - I don't know

i won't spare you otherwise

even i'm tired hitting you

father!

Great location

can't say whether it's morning or night

camera? - It's sony

from what i see, he might not talk, but you'll certainly have a brain surgery

why don't you slow down? If your blood pressure goes high...

you'll land in the graveyard. - So you'll record my humiliation...

and sell it to the channels, eh? - You and i make a good terrorist pair

we'll be famous. - Very smart

you are not an ass like i said. What are you upto?

Ass? Son of an ass, in fact

your phone! Take the call, while i talk to him

how d'you feel sambha? What did you eat last night? Fish?

My whip talks first, then comes logic

did the old man talk?

No sir. - He must talk before he dies

else it'll be time for you guys to die. - Yes sir

you've had it! - What are you doing, father?

I don't know! - If he dies,

we've had it. Try to understand

say thanks. - I don't know

harley davidson?

It was a no-moon night and priyanka, for her honeymoon,

had gone to her forefathers' mansion

she was in her room and sanjay went to organise some food...

when she heard footsteps from the gallery

then she heard the footsteps much closer

priyanka thought it was her husband

she ran to see but there was nothing in sight anywhere...

in the gallery, balcony... nowhere. She was dead scared

her lips dried out of fear

she was thirsty, she ran towards the bathroom,

opened the door

and around 50 bats flew off

but priyanka wasn't scared, she went it...

and saw that the bathroom's bulb was quivering

was it lit? - Trying to light up

she saw the tap, the tap saw her

the tap was as if feigning innocence

priyanka didn't know whether there was a shower or a fountain above

it was watching her like this

the shower and the tap had an understanding

when the tap was on, the shower stopped

when the shower worked, the tap would stop

the tap would drip...

and shower?

Tap?

Shower?

As soon as the ignorant priyanka turned the tap on,

the tap squealed...

priyanka was frightened, she ran towards her bedroom,

and what she saw in there made her lose her senses

the fishes were swimming in the air like this

hey bro...

what is it? - Where's the morgue?

Go straight, then take a right. Is it your first time?

The first time when i came here, my face was covered with a shroud

everything will be fine. - He was dead when he came first!

You know, the graveyard is just behind the autopsy room

a fatso with a moustache sits on a big fat grave there

i asked him if he isn't scared of sitting on a grave