Wild Man Blues

You know, B-flat. B-flat.

Yeah. Not too slow.

Go.

I think it's seen just as a hobby of mine.

Some people want to come, and others don't.

Millions and millions of people

don't have the slightest interest in this music,

whether it's played by me or Sidney Bechet or anyone else.

I never liked that dog.

I don't like dogs,

but even amongst dogs, that dog I especially hate.

'Cause it's wild...

You feed it and walk it,

but there's no return.

I'm always afraid that the dog will lick me.

: She french-kissed a friend of mine.

He was talking and she put her tongue in his mouth. Yes.

- Do you know that it is a medical fact

that dogs' mouths are cleaner than people's?

: I would rather be bitten by the dog

than licked by it. I mean it. - I can arrange that.

- I would rather the dog bit me than...

But I'm telling you that's true.

Dogs' mouths are cleaner than humans'.

- Yeah... - It's the truth.

It actually is. - It's disgusting.

Let me know when we arrive in Paris.

- Hold on one second. - Well, if you don't make noise

and keep the dogs away from me, maybe I can get some sleep.

- Hold up one second. You're on my coat.

- Our goal is to see that you sleep.

G'night, baby.

I don't want to be bothered.

Croissants.

: Get those buns away from that mutt.

I never eat at 4:30 in the morning.

I'm always unconscious. - It's 1 0 after 5:00.

- Ten after 5:00? I should be on the treadmill.

: The next morning, we should leave at 1 1 :00.

Don't you think? - If we leave at 1 1 :00,

when am I going to do my underwear?

Well, you know, the tour started off

just me and the banjo player

saying what a nice idea it would be

to play a couple of places in Europe just for fun.

And then, you know,

two weeks later,

this arduous tour was set.

- I think once you start playing... - Yeah.

The actual act of playing is fun,

but we're all, you know, leaving home,

then I'm going to places that I've never gone to in my life.

- You're only going overnight. - Yeah... Well...

You know, in New York,

you know, I can live my life

just going from my house to where I make films,

to the theatre, to the movies,

to Madison Square Gardens, to you know, just to...

And I don't need...

I never feel a sense

that I have to get away on the weekend or anything.

In fact, it would be a punishment to me.

If someone, you know,

one of those times when I've had to,

for one reason or another, go away on the weekend,

you know, I count the minutes.

Paris...

doesn't have the excitement of New York.

On the other hand, it's more beautiful.

And I love the weather in Paris, because I don't like sun,

and Paris has great gray weather almost all the time.

Soft light. It's really beautiful.

So I'm always very happy walking the streets of Paris,

'cause, you know,

I like the idea that you can do things late at night.

The funny part of it is,

in New York, I don't keep late hours at all.

But I like to know that if it's 3:30 or 4:00 in the morning

and I want a bowl of duck-wonton soup, I can get it.

Now, I don't get it,

because who needs that at 4:00 in the morning?

I practice every day of my life, just about,

because I couldn't play at Michael's Pub every Monday night,

even at the level I play, I couldn't do that without practicing.

I mean, my lip wouldn't hold out,

I wouldn't be able to play anything at all.

They may like the novelty

for the first 1 5-20 minutes,

then, as an hour goes by,

and they're hearing New Orleans jazz, I mean...

- But they're coming to hear that.

You know,

so there'll be a certain enthusiasm.

A big problem is that...

that I'm not a sufficient-enough musician to hold their interest.

If you have a concert

and have a real artist out there who can play...

If this was, you know, Sidney Bechet or John Coltrane

or somebody that can...

then, just to hear them play, you don't need anything else.

They're endlessly creative and great.

But, you know, that doesn't obtain here.

You know, this has...

this has a different quality to it.

- So every country we go to, that you only do one show,

you see it as the closing? - Yeah.

It makes no sense.

- You see it as the opening? - Yes. Tonight's the opening.

- You know, I'm sure there's something we're going to find out.

Unless it's nothing,

unless it's the same thing we do at Michael's Pub,

you know, we're not gonna bore them.

Just say hello and a couple of lines,

and then get on to the playing.

You know, at some point, maybe introduce the musicians.

: That's it?

Yeah. That's more than it.

That's the maximum.

- D'you have a good trip? - Oh, yeah. It was a breeze.

I went over to Paris first,

just 'cause I had to get one night of sleep,

you know, to get over it.

And Paris is the only place outside of New York that I can survive.

You know what I mean?

I can't come right to another country.

I have to go to Paris, then I know I'm in Europe.

- Really? You like it? - Then I can go from there.

And they built it... exact replica of my $1 2 Ramponi.

I told them I only wanted two keys here, no more.

- It's amazing. It looks like an old one, but it's brand-new.

- I didn't want any extra weight on it.

- When you guys sit down, just start into a blues in C.

- Then we just go, play whatever we want,

take it like we're playing at Michael's. - All right.

- How many people are out there?

What's the capacity of this room?

It's... I don't know.

- I think they said, like, 1,700. - 1,800.

That's hilarious.

Yeah. Theoretically,

this should be fun for us.

You know? It should not have a sense of obligation, or... or...

You know, we should just have a good time.

- Yeah. - It should be our pleasure.

Uh, we want to say hello to you,

and I don't know if you can understand me,

I can't speak any, uh, Spanish...

'cause I didn't pay attention in school years ago.

The, uh... we're very honoured to be playing here in Madrid.

Uh, and, uh...

I think we're gonna play for you tonight

the music of New Orleans.

It's, uh....

it's the original birthplace of jazz,

as you undoubtedly know,

and, it's, um, very primitive music.

And, uh, it will be composed mostly of blues

and ragtime and dance music

and, uh, parade music,

so, you know, if you sit back and relax,

and we'll do our best for the next hour and a half or so,

and sing some songs for you and play music,

and thank you all for coming.

- It's sort of like an ancient dialect of jazz.

It's not something you can find anymore.

It's hard enough to find any kind of old jazz.

This type is non-existent, even in New Orleans,

where it originated, it doesn't exist anywhere.

- What we're trying to achieve is crude,

and makes the word "crude" a very acceptable term.

We like it. Most people think of crude and go "ugh,"

but crude is the term that should be used,

but it should be used in a very favorable light.

- When I was a teenager, I heard some New Orleans jazz

and became completely obsessed by it.

So much so that I ran out and bought an instrument

and learned to play it.

There's nothing between you and the pure feeling of the playing.

There's no cerebral element to it at all.

There's something about New Orleans jazz

that just rings a bell in me for some inexplicable reason.

It's like taking a bath in honey or something.

What do we do, we're playing New Orleans jazz.

There's very little interest in that even in its country of origin.

And they're...

they're loving it.

I mean, the problem was getting off and out of there.

I mean, that should be our biggest problem.

We'll be very curious to see

if that reaction is the same with the Swiss or the Germans.

Oh, yes, come in.

: Do you have the tip? - Yeah, I have it.

Here, guys. - Thank you.

- Okay. I have to get my multivitamin,

baby aspirin, antibiotic...

Okay. Is this you or me?

That's the Spanish omelet.

Oh. How appropriate.

Here you are. - Oh, thank you.

- Just our normal average breakfast.