The first 200 lines.
- I'm a detective, a private eye.
I've had my share of wiseguys,
dames, and danger...
Okay, more than my share...
All part of this terrible business.
Trust no one.
Look out for numero uno.
A client hires me to discover the truth.
You always recycle after lunch, and that takes a minute or two,
and that's right before fifth period,
so you had your notes.
- No way. - No. She used your phone.
Took a picture while your back was turned.
That's how she made it look like you were cheating off her.
I mean, no way.
Jonas does the recycling for the whole table.
Maybe it was just a coincidence.
But thanks for trying.
- No, wait. I'll redouble my efforts.
- Stanley, you did a good job, but maybe next time.
Kid Detective Agency, satisfaction guaranteed.
Tell your friends.
Yup, that's me,
Stanley Kid...
You don't know about detectives?
All right, listen up.
Basically, detectives made America great,
men like Philip Marlowe, Sam Spade,
Rex Stout, me,
men of action who always wear hats.
The better the detective, the worse the client.
Clients are people who've hit rock bottom
and started digging.
They need help.
The detective opens the case.
The case will involve a corrupt cop,
sometimes a judge,
and a bad guy...
or three.
Oh, yeah, and usually there's a dame in there somewhere.
But we keep our eyes open.
Everyone has a secret.
Play the cards you hold and live to solve another case.
That's the life of a world-famous private eye.
Famous?
Oh, yeah.
On this island, people who never heard of me try to hire me.
Trouble just brings 'em to my door.
I answer and say, "Trouble? Great.
Come on in."
Don't get me wrong.
I wasn't born like this.
I was a good kid once from a normal family:
Dad, Mom, me, my sister.
Dad used to travel a lot.
He was a musician.
He was killed when a steel strut supporting the main stage
gave way.
Tough break, kid.
Mom does her best, but her health isn't great.
She's in and out of the hospitals.
She's got to rely on me.
I'm the man of the house now,
so I'm stuck with the world-class interfering pest
who happens to be my sister.
Where are we going?
We aren't going anywhere.
Mom said you have to watch me.
- Just go inside. - But what if...
- Nina, you ask too many questions.
Just go inside.
- That's because I'm a detective.
She's not a detective.
She's delusional.
But my cases don't always start
with trouble finding me.
Sometimes I find it.
Mom, I'm home.
Mom?
Mom?
Mom?
- You have reached the Kid residence.
- Mom? - Please leave a message.
Beep!
- Stanley, this is Clorissa Hodge.
I think you remember me.
Do I remember Clorissa Hodge?
Who can forget a social worker who spreads misery
like an infected rat spreads the plague?
Listen, last time Mom went down,
I called 911...
Mom? Mom!
Mom! - Call 911.
And what thanks did I get?
Clorissa Hodge hauled Nina and me to the children's home
on totally trumped-up charges.
She didn't even read us our rights.
We didn't even get a phone call.
She's the kind who will knife you in the back
and then arrest you for carrying a concealed weapon.
I'm the kind who thinks it's too bad
we don't hang more social workers these days.
Now this...
Your mom is in the hospital.
Please call me as soon as possible
so I can arrange to come and check in
on you and your sister.
I don't know if Clorissa Hodge
has a thing against all detectives
or just me.
But this time,
we weren't going down without a fight.
I needed to throw her off our trail.
Miss Hodge, this is Detective Stanley Kid.
My junior associate, Nina, and I
are out of the country on a case for a long time.
Please close your file, because your assistance is not...
I repeat, not... required.
Thank you. That is all.
I had to get to my sister.
That message might've been just to delay me
so she can grab Nina first.
I put nothing past Clorissa Hodge.
Where is Mom?
She was supposed to drive me home.
She's in the hospital.
Let's go.
I didn't want to worry Nina about Miss Hodge.
Fortunately she had other things on her mind.
Why can't we go visit Mom?
We could ride our bikes.
- Because it might be full of childhood diseases,
contagious childhood diseases.
- But we have all our vaccinations,
and we don't bathe that often,
so we have very strong immune systems.
Plus, she's gonna be worried about us.
- She's the one who made the plan:
get Addison to stay with us, and I take care of you.
Great plan.
- I guess I have to call Addison.
I hate Addison.
No answer.
Try Max.
Who?
- You know, that goofy guy that hangs out with her all the time.
Just go inside.
Maybe I couldn't see the flames,
but I smelled smoke.
In this business, smart men don't fear the hardheads,
the half-wits, the snakes, or the seriously insane.
Smart men fear the fire and...
My cousin Addison.
This better be good.
- This would be easier if answered your phone.
- My phone was stolen. What do you want, Stanley?
I think Mom got sick again.
- I'm sorry. What do you want from me?
Can you call the hospital?
I'll do anything you say.
You'll find my phone?
- I'm a detective. I'll get it back.
All right, I'll go inside.
Thanks, Addison.
I see.
And has she been admitted?
Okay, and Dr. Kurr isn't there?
Okay, I'll leave a message at his office.
Yes, I have the number.
No, no. Thank you.
So?
- So her blood sugar was falling.
She called the paramedics
but was laying on the floor when they get here.
They're stabilizing her.
Is she gonna die?
No.
Can you talk to me on the porch?
No way, Nina. No way.
Your mom's tough.
I need you to stay.
- You can't expect me to drop everything and babysit.
- No, no, I just need an adult to be here.
Stanley.
I went to your office, but you weren't there.
- She's staying with us until my mom gets back...
maybe.
- Find my phone, great detective,
or I'm out of here.
It's my board, my skateboard.
It's gone. - Gone?
Swiped, vamoosed, stolen.
Not just mine.
Both the Erickson brothers and Jay Morton lost his.
- So you think this is some type of serial robbery thing?
Yeah, but there's more.
Okay.
But let's not talk here.
Since you're a good client, come into my lab.
- Good client? Man, I'm your best friend.
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