Marvel's Ultimate Spider-Man

(STAMMERING)

Okay. Oh... Hey, hey, hey!

Spider-Man!

Who else would it be?

Unless you know some other superhero who spins webs and sticks to walls,

and is late for a very important date.

Not good.

Yeah, that will not be my profile pic.

Miles Morales here. You know, Spider-Man.

And it's moments like this I wonder if I'm really qualified

to follow in Peter Parker's footsteps.

Or websteps. Are "Websteps" a thing?

Hey! Personal space.

I destroyed one Spider-Man already.

Time for another.

So greedy. Think of all the other super-villains that want me dead.

I'm glad Peter's no longer around to see this.

Hello? Where'd you go, Mr. Goblin?

Why can't all my battles end like this?

Nice. Just found my new profile pic.

Peter Parker here, your friendly neighborhood

amateur sleuth tracking Doc Ock.

And I deduce he might have something to do with that.

Doc Ock with Baron Mordo?

Otto, you have the most bizarre friends.

From the dark book of Vashti,

I cast the passenger spell of Varnae!

La, ia perilous fathgen...

Baron Mordo. This guy's a wannabe Dr. Strange,

except totally evil, works for Hydra, and isn't even a doctor.

What's he the baron of, anyway? Crazytown?

You imbecilic spider, you have no idea

what you've stumbled into.

Is it a rave? Oh, and here I forgot my glow sticks.

The siege perilous is no mere party accoutrement.

The siege perilous?

That device that opens portals to the other dimensions?

I'm gonna guess this isn't good.

Huh?

I hate being right!

Oh, I'd know the pain from that fireball anywhere.

'Course. That Goblin.

You're not my Spider-Man. What have you done?

You're blaming me? Did you not see the guy

with robes and spells and a "questionable beard"?

No.

This is what I get for helping?

Okay, so I guess we're not gonna be friends.

Hope I don't hit that wall.

Don't remember the weatherman forecasting cracks in the sky tonight.

By the Eye of Agamotto, you were right, Octavius.

This goblin is truly a sight to behold.

You brought me from my world. Why?

In all the dimensions, you are the only goblin

who successfully destroyed a Spider-Man.

Hydra summoned you here to obliterate another one.

Why are they always talking behind my back?

Haters gonna hate!

Sorry to break up the job interview.

Super-sticky webs. He'll be trying to get that off for weeks.

Or milliseconds. How did I forget how strong you are?

Hunting spiders, my favorite pastime.

Never thought I'd say this, but you're making me miss my own goblin.

Yes. Destroy him.

Whoa! What's with you and all the throwing?

Oh, where is there a wall when you need one?

Or a mystical energy sphere. That'll work too.

Hey, I'm not picky.

There was a disruption on the web of realities.

I wish I could say I'm surprised to find you at the center of it, Spider-Man.

Dr. Strange. Why does everyone blame me for this?

What kind of reputation do I have in this town?

Ock and Mordo must've been missing their own Goblin,

so they brought a new one from another reality.

His presence has disrupted the balance of our world!

- (DR. STRANGE GRUNTS) - Doc!

I love to see a spider squirm.

Strike one!

Strike two! Three! And I'm outta here!

Okay, Spidey. When have you not risen to the occasion?

This is a bigger and badder goblin than my old one.

But I can be a bigger and badder...

What was I saying again?

You may have stumbled your way to victory before.

"Stumbled?" Well, now you know my secret strategy.

But that all ends to...

Quickly, we have to get the goblin back to his world

before the damage to ours is critical.

Stephen. Here for my moment of glory.

Book of Thoth...

Admonit edium!

You could do so much with your skill, Karl, yet you work for archfiends.

The lesser Book of Vashanti...

Extranous epilorum!

I told you never to call me Karl!

Intrambi coaxium!

Lorus thweem!

Sorry to interrupt your spell-ing bee. Get it?

But... Yoink!

Aah!

No!

Strange cannot handle the power of the siege perilous!

Aah!

Really? I think I'm gonna trust a doctor's opinion over some baron's.

I can only hold the portal open

for a limited time before the damage is irreversible.

Don't worry. I've got a plan.

- Hey, ugly! - Huh?

Name-calling? That is your plan?

He totally looked.

Try to catch me, you second-rate Osborn!

Man, this is easier than dodgeball in gym class, with kindergartners.

The last laugh will be mine!

Nope. Mine.

See what I did there?

No!

I'm not leaving yet.

Not when there's a Spider-Man left.

Reality's on the edge of shattering.

By the flaming tower of Radomaski!

Goblin's throwing off the balance

because I'm not the Spider-Man who counterbalances him.

Can you hold that portal open a little longer?

I shall try.

I just hope Miles isn't hard to find.

- Miles? - The Spider-Man from this goblin's world.

I have another plan.

I do hope it is superior to calling him ugly.

Make haste!

You cannot hold this forever, Stephen Strange.

Hurry, Spider-Man.

Well, here goes

nothing!

Of course the portal isn't on the ground,

because that would be too easy.

Okay, gotta find one teenager in the middle of New York

before the portal collapses and strands me in an alternate dimension.

So, no pressure.

Hello! This world's Spider-Man.

- Hey! - Anyone seen him?

Balancing a cake while webbing through the city?

No pressure.

Ay! Miles, you startled me.

I'm still not used to you having these powers.

Sorry, Mom.

Hey, there might be something in this box you'd be interested in.

Tres leches! My favorite.

The best mom in the world deserves the best cake in the world.

- Happy birthday. - I saw you on the news today.

That goblin. He looks so dangerous.

You know I have to do this.

It's kind of my responsibility.

Hmm. Your dad used to say the same thing.

He always helped everyone else before helping himself.

I know. Which is exactly why

you're going to let me finish vacuuming. (LAUGHS)

- I'm almost done. - It's your birthday.

Help yourself to some cake.

Is it really you, the one from another dimension?