Novitiate

So many people settle for love that doesn't really ask

anything of them, that they don't have to make any sacrifices for.

I don't want that.

I want an ideal love that I have to give everything to.

Where are you?

Where are you?

Why are you doing this?

In the name of the father...

Benedicamus domino

benedicamus domino

dear Christ.

I was 17 years old when I came to the convent,

18 when I entered the novitiate.

I know a lot of people could probably never understand...

Never understand how someone so young

with their entire life ahead of them

would want to give it all away to god.

They think of nuns today, and they see a bunch of old women.

Women who couldn't find husbands,

or for some reason,

just couldn't make it in the outside world.

So they ran off to a monastery to escape everything.

What they don't understand is that beneath everything else...

We were women in love.

You're all I could ever want.

You ready for this?

Okay, you can come right out this way.

Ls my hair all right?

Good morning, father.

Nora Harris? I can't believe it. Ls it you?

Hey, rob, it sure is. How you been?

I've been good. I've been real good.

Now, wait a minute. Now don't tell me. Ls this cathleen?

It sure is. Can you believe it? Look how big she got.

My goodness. Hey, pretty lady. How are you?

You know, you're not allowed to grow up that fast.

Soon, you'll be taller than me.

I gotta say, Nora, I'm a little surprised to see you here.

I've known you all my life,

and I don't think I've ever seen you within 500 yards of a Sunday service.

Yeah, well, don't get your hopes up.

I'm not here to be saved or nothing like that.

I just thought it about time

that cathleen learned what religion was about.

- Or supposed to be about, you know. - Yeah.

Plus, we were a little bored, weren't we?

Well, hey, that's all right with me. I'm just glad you're here.

- Let's get y'all a good seat. - All right.

Come on in. Right there's two, right up front there.

Blessed be god the father.

Because although you have not seen him, you still love him.

Although you do not know him, you still believe in him.

You feel his presence all around without knowing his name,

and you rejoice with an indescribable ecstasy.

Because if there's one thing we know,

it's that god's love is unconditional.

Put your napkin in your lap.

Thank you.

Did you like going to that church today?

Yeah, I did.

Yeah?

What'd you like about it the most?

I don't know.

I guess I just thought it was peaceful.

"Peaceful," huh?

Yeah, I guess it was kind of peaceful.

What kind of church was it, again?

That was a catholic church.

Are we catholic?

No, we're not anything.

I don't really believe in religion, actually.

I think it's kind of a waste of time.

But when you're older, you can decide for yourself.

Mmm-mmm.

Looks like daddy's home.

Hey, hey, hey, baby.

How's daddy's little girl? Huh?

What'd you do today? Did you have a good day today?

Daddy, where were you?

We've been waiting for you for so long.

Yeah, it's a valid question, Chuck. Where you been?

I was out. That's all.

Okay. 'Cause we've been sitting here all day, waiting on you.

You never heard of a phone or...

Come on, Nora, please. Of course I've heard of a phone.

Well, that's good. You've heard of a phone. That's nice.

What do you want me to say, Nora?

Is there anything in particular that you'd like to hear me say?

I don't know, Chuck.

Maybe I'd just like you to be a man every once in a while, you know?

Be a fucking father for a change,

maybe learn to sacrifice a little bit.

Give me a break, okay? Are you serious with that?

What, you want me to drop it, Chuck? Ls that what you want?

- Yeah! - Well, fuck you!

Fuck me? Fuck you, Nora!

As a matter of fact, fuck all this shit!

I'm sick of this!

I'm sorry that I can't be the person you want me to be!

No, you can't be the man i wanted you to be.

- You are the opposite of that! - Okay. All right.

I was out! That's all! You can't handle that, I'm gone!

Where do you think you're going, Chuck?

You're not leaving!

You got a little girl now! Hear me?

- If you leave, you get out! - Well, fuck you!

Honey, will you take this for me?

You got it?

Excuse me?

Can I help you?

Yes. Are you Mrs. Harris?

- Yes. - My name is sister Gloria.

This is sister Eleanor.

We're from our lady of blessed sorrows,

the parochial school just up the road.

We are very proud to say that it is the nuns, sisters like us,

who have built the catholic school system in this country,

brick by brick.

Your little one is so lovely, by the way.

May I ask how old?

Cathleen is 12.

Look, we appreciate your coming by,

but the truth is, we're not all that religious.

I mean, we go to church when we can, like everybody else.

But my husband, cathleen's father,

he left us a while back, so it's just me taking care of us.

Sorry to hear that, Mrs. Harris.

God cherishes your strength.

But one thing you should know,

our doors are open to everyone,

practicing, non-practicing alike.

Our first priority is just to provide an exceptional education.

Well, how much does it cost? I don't know if we can afford this school.

Well, that's just it.

Right now, we're offering full scholarships

on a first-come basis.

Silence, girls.

Silence.

How many in this room were baptized catholic?

Don't worry, this is not a judgment on anybody's background or belief.

No, the reason I ask the question

is because I wonder if any of you know

what the difference is between the catholic religion

and all the other religions.

Say like, the protestants, the baptists, the Jews?

Love

and sacrifice.

Love and sacrifice.

Because if there's one thing i know for certain,

there can be no love

without sacrifice.

Hi, there.

How come you're sitting all alone?

You don't wanna join the others?

They're all talking about their boyfriends.

I don't have a boyfriend.

Oh, no?

Me, neither.

I'm told they're overrated.

Mind if I join you?

I'm sister Margaret, by the way. You're cathleen, right?

I haven't had you in my class yet, but I've noticed you

because you're shy, like me.

You seem to like to be by yourself a lot, to think a lot?

I guess so.

I like to be by myself and think a lot, too.

- You do? - Mmm-hmm.

What do you like to think about?

Mostly about god.

Can I show you something?

You see that light in there?

That's his light.

And the statue to the side, the savior, of course, Jesus Christ.

Here, you wanna sit down for a sec?

Go ahead.

Just because someone likes to be alone

doesn't mean they don't still crave intimacy.

You really think god and Jesus are real?

Of course I do. I more than do.

'Cause I'm married to them, silly.

Didn't you know? All nuns are brides of Christ.

But why?

I bet you could have married anyone you wanted to.

Oh...

Well, I'm... I'm not so sure about that.

And either way,

I doubt any other relationship would have been quite as fulfilling.

Oh, I gotta go. I've got class.

Are you coming?

I think I'll stay for a little while, if that's okay with you, sister.

Of course.

Good night, cathleen.

Good night, miss Williams.

Hi.

Cathleeni who is he?

He's just a friend of mine, that's all.

Another one?

What are you doing up so early, anyway?

I set my alarm so I can go to mass before school.

Oh. Okay.