Ugly Aur Pagli - Ugly and Crazy (Ugly Aur Pagli)

'Percept Picture Company.'

In a search for myself.

I hope that if only I had found a bit of you in myself.

Undoubtedly, you're an individual. There's a difference between us.

As if we're walking together but there's a road between us.

I experience different aspects of life.

I enrich my world with different feelings.

So what if you're not like me...

...you're still a part of me.

You're another aspect of my identity.

So what if you're not like me... you're still a part of me.

You're another aspect of my identity.

In a search for myself.

I hope that if only I had found a bit of you in myself.

'It's said there's somewhere a girl made for every boy.'

'But until the age of five, I didn't even know...

...whether I was a boy or a girl.'

'That's because when I was small...

...my parents always used to dress me like a girl.'

'Can you imagine? '

'Actually, they wanted a girl. But, what to do? They got me.'

'That's me. So sweet, am I not? '

'I grew up in Mumbai.'

'And staying in Mumbai for twenty years...

...you do come to know the difference...

...between a girl and a boy, right? '

Shut up! I will become a qualified engineer this year.

With my own money! - Great! Great!

Not like you guys, living on pocket money.

Right! Right! - Hey, you have been doing...

...the same thing since the past three years. Just killing time.

Come on! Come on! Come on! - Come on, have the free snacks.

Yes, have the free snacks, you horse.

'Now I was less of a boy and more of a dish antenna.'

'An expert in catching signals of the girls.'

'Thought I didn't catch a girl for myself as yet.'

'But I felt all that is about to change.'

Guys, I am going to get lucky tonight. - You?

You!

Who is it? - Your mother!

You are out, right? - Mother!

Yes! You are in a disco, right? - No. - I can hear the music.

No, mother. I am not outside. It's the wedding music.

Someone's wedding procession is passing by.

Useless, why didn't you go to aunt Sandhya's house?

You know that she lives alone. - Yes, mother.

And she wants you to meet some unfortunate girl.

I don't want to meet any girl, mother.

I am concentrating on my studies.

You concentrate on your studies and graduate this year.

Okay, mother. Then I will be concentrating on my work.

Forget that. You first go and meet your aunt Sandhya first.

Yes mother, I am going to meet aunt Sandhya.

I am on my way. That... actually... the bridge is coming...

The network is getting... - Hello, Chiku!

Listen! Chiku!

Okay guys, sorry. I have to go. Bye. - Hey, bill...

'I lost another chance. This is the story of my life.'

'Fate used to make me go up and down. Up and down.'

'Just like this lift. Why is it going up? '

'Beer and grams are a very deadly combination.'

'Whoa! What a sound! I should name it.'

'Debu.'

'Hello, what is this lift doing? '

'Well, hello! '

'Welcome again.'

'I knew I was going to get lucky tonight.'

'My destiny was finally favouring me.'

'This Debu is still here? '

That button. If you press that, the lift will stop.

'Go away, Debu, you will ruin my chance.'

'She hates Debu, then how will she love me? '

God, lift! Stop please!

'Oh no, Debu.'

'So this is how my, Kabir Archarekar's...

...another day was about to end.'

Hey, are you crazy?

That 11:07 Thane local moved her tresses...

...and made her intoxicated eyes meet mine.'

'She was beautiful.'

'Not just her eyes, even she was intoxicated.'

'Who would want such a wife? '

Hey, what have I done? - Aren't you ashamed?

An old man is standing and you are sitting!

Idiot! Get lost!

'Drunkard was doing social service.'

Thank you, thank you. - Please sit.

'Oh no, mount Fuji was about to erupt! '

Hey! Hey! What are you doing?

What are you doing?

Look! She ruined my clothes.

You saw she made me sit and then did this.

Darling... darling...

Darling... - It's stinking. It's stinking.

'Darling, me? '

What have I done? I don't know her!

Okay.

You should clean it. You should clean it.

This is a public property and not your private property.

You should clean it.

Hello, pussy cat.

'She was very heavy compared to the figure she had.'

'But she was completely out now.'

'And this was the chance! Run, Kabir, run!

'Run! Run, fast! Before she wakes up! That's right, Kabir.'

'Leave this drunk girl alone at Parel station...

...in such a condition and run! '

'I wish I could do that. But what to do? '

'I had to make sure she is safe.'

'I felt that this is my responsibility.'

'And hence I will have to take care of her.'

'Why do girls have their entire wardrobe in their bag? '

'I will never be able to understand that.'

'I don't know why I was stuck with her at midnight.'

'Had she fainted at Dadar station instead of Parel...

...then at least I could have gotten a taxi.'

'I had only one option.'

Sir, I need a room. - She?

She is with me.

She is with you or... - Nothing like that.

She is just a little unwell.

The ones feeling unwell come here instead of going to the hospital.

Payment? Cash or card? - Cash.

Rupees 2,000 only. - 2,000!

Do you have it or... - No, I will give it. I'll pay.

Chotu! - Come, sir.

Come in, sir.

'My plan was that I will make her sleep...

...in the hotel and return home. But... '

Okay, thank you.

Goodnight, sir. - Goodnight.

Goodnight, sir. - I said good...

Sweetdreams, sir.

No, sir.

'He won't accept change. He wanted currency notes.'

'My last reserve 50 rupees came down to 30 now.'

Happy birthday, sir.

'My God! He looked a distant relative of Jaadu.'

'I didn't feel it's right to leave this drunkard...

...here in this condition.'

'But don't get any ideas, okay? '

'Just trying to make sure that she is safe and sound.'

'Speaking of sound, wow, perfect.'

'She snores too. Just my luck.'

'So this was the first time I was alone in a room with a girl.'

'And that too like this.'

'Disgusting.'

'It was hot.'

'So like a thorough gentlemen, I decided to do something.'

'They should have at least installed an air conditioner...

...worth 500 rupees, in a room worth 2,000 rupees.'

'Oh no.'

'Never mind. Even I am an engineering student.'

Hey manager, put the power back on!

Oh no! - You have charged us for it! Switch on the lights!

I haven't done anything. I am sleeping.

No, nothing happened from our room.

The car is moving in north direction instead of south!

I don't know. Look, I don't know anything.

Hello! - Switch on the lights! - Call the police!

'Even after everything happened...

...the story doesn't end here.'

Come on, come on! Come on! Go back! Go back! Go back!

Come on! Bend down and catch your ears!

Public nonsense! Bend down and catch your ears!

Should I SMS it to you?

Come on, sit down, catch your ears and bend over!

Come on!

Hey public nonsense, come on, lie down.

Come on, lie down.

Head down! Head down!

Come on, lie down.

Hey, come on.

See, his ears are so soft.

If his hears are so soft then...

Take me... c'mon...

'Mummy! Mummy! Mummy! '

Hey newbie, it's time. Hey you, come on.

Move! Get going!

Wake up! Wake up!

Hey handsome, at least give me your phone number.

We will play together when I get out.

Hey pickpocket, keep quiet or I will give you a tight slap.

Romeo! - Pickpocket?

Hey... hey, come... come.

'I always wanted to do something different.'

'I told my parents ample number of times...

...to help me in opening a beer bar.'

'But this tormenting society... '

Look where you're going!

I don't know how much more tea he will drink.

This is the fourth serving. When will I cook?

And this boy hasn't come as yet too.

This is your last tea.

Newspaper... newspaper...

Hi, father. - Hi! - Where is your tee shirt?

Mother, there was a naked child.

He was feeling cold and hence I gave it to him.

Did you go to meet aunt Sandhya at Worli?

Yes, I went to Worli! - You are lying! - Mother! Mother!